Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38281) - you totally deserved it (3852)
On 06/27/2009 at 10:29am - love - by a_B_c_D_e_F_g (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Women just don't understand. I'd do the same thing.. bacon, beer, cars, women are things we need to make a great day.
#21 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:13pm by iamjtsocool
DAMN RIGHT! HAVE YOU EVER TRIED BACON LADY?! BACON DON'T COMPLAIN.
#142 - On 06/27/2009 at 11:25pm by KrAzEdMaNiAc
you should have felt happy that he was allowing you to kiss him when he obv had more important things to do...looks like you've got a keeper there
Tbh I'm not sure I would want to wrap her in bacon. There is situations where bacon DOESN'T fit, as well. :|
#203 - On 06/28/2009 at 4:17pm by TysonFawlay
mmmm bacon
http://www.saynotocrack.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/04/bacon-dispenser.jpg
#50 - On 06/27/2009 at 6:02pm by Ilovelife07
Bacon is one of the greatest things in the world, so I really can't blame him. :)
#5 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:03pm by cherlana32
Second fml that i deals with bacon... LOl
gotta love bacon i guess
#6 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:04pm by IstDasExtrem
The real FML would be if he failed to find anything to wrap with bacon. Bacon should be a food group :(
#7 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:04pm by Cormophyte
dude, he obviously is just maxing out his pleasure. Making out with a chick and looking at food porn. your boyfriend is genius.
#11 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:06pm by bellaellaella
u got yourself a good man.
bacon recipes? oh man, dont ever let him go.
#12 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:06pm by yuZj
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
he's gay. if ur a dude, then he's just not that into you
#13 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:07pm by deliapearl
@13:WTF? Everyone loves Bacon. It doesn't make him gay.
I take that back. Some people can't really have bacon.
Poor diabetics..
But anyway, OP that does suck. I was making out with a bf one time and I opened my eyes to see him looking at the TV watching Harry Potter.
#92 - On 06/27/2009 at 7:51pm by SamJHalfSTAR
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
HAHAHAHA, this comment FTW.
#14 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:08pm by yuZj
I'm kind of ashamed to say I'm a guy.
I really hope all the posters that are okay with the BF doing that are joking.
#22 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:14pm by genius_man16
I'm pretty sure they're not joking. It's just bacon, why would anyone have a problem with that?
#52 - On 06/27/2009 at 6:07pm by happylittleman
What's wrong? He's definitely a keeper! I mean.. who doesn't like bacon? Btw; have anyone tried those new chocolate with bacon in it? I can't find it anywhere, but i can't wait to try it out when i do! :)
Bacon is fucking awesome.
Damnit, now I gotta go make that bacon I have in my freezer. I was saving that bacon!
Is he the guy who posted the FML about having a sexy dream about bacon?
#25 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:16pm by purple_riot
Wrap yourself up in bacon and give him what he wants bitch!
#29 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:18pm by MeganH0LLYW00D
I personally don't like bacon so I think that sucks...
#31 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:23pm by jollyholly414
#53, don't be an idiot. I get that you were trying to be funny, but it didn't work. some people don't like bacon. I've had it once in my life.
#141 - On 06/27/2009 at 11:23pm by spirited_away33
141, how's being a buzzkill working out for you, Buzz Killington?
#156 - On 06/28/2009 at 1:42am by wafflemonger
reminds me of that simpsons episode where homer wraps a stick of butter in bacon and gets a heart attack lmfao.
You need the bacon bra. With that, you will have his full attention at all times.
#40 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:37pm by elfuzzo
i think you should start dating ur vibrator full time insead of just weekends and thursdays
#41 - On 06/27/2009 at 5:40pm by Colby_Colbert
Is your boyfriend the one who had the orgasm dream about bacon?
Because that would be freaking awesome
IT'S A SMALL WORLD
#48 - On 06/27/2009 at 6:00pm by SeventhFonons
I really hope its the same bloke! It'll be like an update on his situation.
#64 - On 06/27/2009 at 6:42pm by ZombieKnickers
Does your boyfriend also climax from having intense dreams about bacon?
#58 - On 06/27/2009 at 6:22pm by englishmuffin
another unoriginal FML about a boyfriend being distracted by something during an intimate moment approved while my fake ones go unnoticed
#62 - On 06/27/2009 at 6:35pm by hugzandkisses666
BACON! OH YESSSSSSSSSSS! SOFTERRR, CHEWWIEERRR, OHHHH YEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSss
#66 - On 06/27/2009 at 6:49pm by Timismaster
YDI, for being a complainer.
Bacon is probably more delicious than you.
#67 - On 06/27/2009 at 6:50pm by crzidancer14
And you were wondering why he was so incredibly turned on.
#74 - On 06/27/2009 at 7:05pm by CherubInPants
My cholesterol just went up reading this.. Bacon's fucking disgusting. Goes way over the 10% fat calorie limit and has lots of cholesterol.. Good luck with them heart attacks.
#77 - On 06/27/2009 at 7:16pm by Ignisin
Shut the fuck up #77. I'm really sick of the health police trying to tell people what they should and shouldn't eat. Go back to eating your disgusting bull shit health food and leave us to eat what we want. A well balanced diet has room even for 4 strips of bacon (per day if you so choose). Just get some exercise and you will be fine.
#84 - On 06/27/2009 at 7:41pm by blueknight1st
Hey you fat sack of shit. I'm really sick with the fat asses who put disgusting crap in their body while the rest of humanity has to look at them. Now take the dick out of your mouth that you love to suck on and know that healthy food is very good for the body and is great tasting. Now go eat your green fucking beans.
#135 - On 06/27/2009 at 10:46pm by Ignisin
Didn't I tell you to shut the fuck up? I guess I hurt you feeling making fun of you bull shit healt food that tastes like buffalo shit. Go to hell food Nazi.
#137 - On 06/27/2009 at 11:00pm by blueknight1st
I eat bacon and I'm a high performing athelete. Stop being a pussy and let people eat what they want.
People, people. Let's all just chill out and eat some bacon. :)
#187 - On 06/28/2009 at 11:32am by SpaghettiCat
i concur BACON and i can so see my friend doing that and to the health police he is THIN
#233 - On 02/16/2010 at 11:19pm by qwertification
are u sure it was bacon and not Beggin Strips? he might have thought u were hungry.. hmmm
#97 - On 06/27/2009 at 8:01pm by prodigy000
I actually just read an article today that spoke about the results of a survey that showed that men prefer food to sex. The survey, conducted by Magnum icecream, polled almost 10,000 people across the country. Men rated taste sensations as their top pleasure trigger, with physical arousal (including sex) coming in fourth. Personal accomplishment was second, then the need to relax.
#98 - On 06/27/2009 at 8:01pm by honeyishrnkdakid
That's a trip... I thought the need to relax was an aftermath sort of thing that tops it off.
I doubt the bacon thing was meant for you a_B_c_D_e_F_g. I love you name though! I think I get the reference even if I'm just making it up. :P
This was a purely awesome fml though.
#101 - On 06/27/2009 at 8:07pm by PepPlacid127
Erghhh I'm gagging at all these bacon comments *vomits a little bit in mouth*
Whatever it was he was he was doing, it was obviously more important than kissing you or giving you his full attention so in that respect FYL but
what a werido
i'ts just bacon ERGHH
bahaha! aww i'm sorry =/
that sucks.....but very funny
#106 - On 06/27/2009 at 8:19pm by thatWOULD_happen
Am I missing something.
Am I the only person who finds making out incredibly boring unless it is leading directly to sex?
#107 - On 06/27/2009 at 8:19pm by Lambshanks
it seems nasty..i bet the other person's mouth tastes bad ..i bet some people get so into it, they lick each other's teeth and move their tongue all around and inside the other's mouth..i but they also try to remove the plaque with their tongue because they just feel so close to the other person omg now i'm laughing so hard picturing different ways people can make out
#148 - On 06/28/2009 at 12:45am by hugzandkisses666
Welcome to the iProduct Widow Support Group.
We serve bacon-free stacks at break-time.
At least my iAddicted boyfriend is a vegetarian...
#108 - On 06/27/2009 at 8:20pm by crazy_duck
meh its not that bad really, look on the bright side, your bf can multitask and he wasnt texting some other girl
If you want to really turn him on (for his birthday or something), put some bacon in your mouth and make out with him. Let him pull it into his mouth with his tongue. Oh god I am convulsing at the thought of how much pleasure that would give me.
No offense, young man, but ewww... Food and making out don't mix, and if they do, it's stuff like chocolate, whipped cream, etc. But I should stop talking for the rest of the world. Happy baconing! I ain't gonna kiss someone smelling of it :)
Dudeee bacon is one of THE most kick-ass foods out there!!! Then somthing WRAPPEDA in bacon, well now... That's just freakin ownage!!! And hey, he was mostlikely trying to surprise u in the morning with whatever he looked up, while still giving you the pleasure of making out with him :DD so in my opinion, ur bf owns. That's deff somthing I'm going to do for my gf someday lolz
#118 - On 06/27/2009 at 9:10pm by albinoninja
honestly, this reminds me of my friend who no matter what he seems to be doing, he's on his iphone. he was on his iphone through a whole movie. i understand what this guy is doing.
#120 - On 06/27/2009 at 9:16pm by livingxcolor
Eat bacon before you kiss him!
Then you taste like the good stuff!
Mmm, baaaccccoooon.
#121 - On 06/27/2009 at 9:22pm by UseTheFrags
Oh my God! I want to marry your boyfriend! He sounds so funny. If I was in your situation, I would have laughed my ass off. That's friggin' amazing.
#127 - On 06/27/2009 at 10:06pm by musicismylife19
this reminds me of another FML of a guy who had an intense sexual dream about bacon.
lol. I guess bacon's a turn on for some men....
"Today, I was checking out some hot bacon pics on my iPhone and I was about to climax when my girlfriend suddenly starts making out with me. She stated bitching at me for looking at bacon and it killed the mood. FML."
bacon trumps making out. actually, a lot of things trump making out. it gets pretty boring.
#132 - On 06/27/2009 at 10:22pm by starvingxartist
#130, did you just make that up, or was it actually real?
#134 - On 06/27/2009 at 10:44pm by beckified
Maybe you should wrap yourself in bacon for him and make him eat it off.
#139 - On 06/27/2009 at 11:12pm by that_one_dude
Hey, is this the same guy who had that wet dream about bacon a few weeks back?
#140 - On 06/27/2009 at 11:14pm by thebigslim
lol that sucks but it's really funny i could see my BF doing that too though
#143 - On 06/27/2009 at 11:44pm by SarahsWickedGame
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH that is just 100% amazing in every single way!! omgggg haha :P awesome, just cause its bacon.
Take that as a compliment, you remind him of badass bacon, and what to wrap in it!
#146 - On 06/28/2009 at 12:05am by Person1233
*Geniusman* --compared to 99% of the guys commenting in this thread, you really are a genius..lol.
OP-your bf was either high/drunk or being plain retarded.
#149 - On 06/28/2009 at 1:05am by cutebebe778
I really don't see the problem here. Any time is a great time for bacon. And if you want to have bacon on any website you visit, put http://bacolicio.us/ before any website and you can add bacon to it! Cool beans, right?
lmao! thats so disgusting
"hey come over I have something for you, I'm in the room, u can just come in"
*walks in...sees OP covered in bacon* =)
wow, I love how many people think bacon is better than anything ^_^
If my boyfriend did this, I'd be pissed cause I'm a vegetarian.
#159 - On 06/28/2009 at 2:05am by rockonidiot45
Obvously when he asked you if you wanna strip, you had the wrong idea in mind.
#162 - On 06/28/2009 at 2:34am by doof_fisch
I'm a girl, and i have to say that that's not an fml. It's just a guy thing. At least he wants to know how to cook! That leaves less work for u! Pluse if u dont want him doing that make the makeout more exciting
#167 - On 06/28/2009 at 3:09am by nanoflacka
at least your boyfriend is looking at recipes? mine cooked me dinner once - it was cold leftover chicken from his grandmother's fridge.
#169 - On 06/28/2009 at 3:54am by miss_california
He should show some etiquette. Like say "I'm not into this right now, sorry lets make out later. Read the book He's Just Not That Into You to see if he's worth it
#170 - On 06/28/2009 at 3:55am by RIOTCHICK
hmmmmm, make out with girlfriend, or climax with bacon? It must not have been really hard for him to weigh the options. :)
#178 - On 06/28/2009 at 7:03am by ImAllFailure
the big question here is... did you start making out when he was already on his iphone, or did he start browsing the iphone after you started? in case 1, YDI for interrupting him doing something really interesting. in case 2, maybe you should take your shirt off to keep his attention! or maybe you shouldn't, so he can keep his eyesight . . .
in any case, YDI. FYL because i wouldn't want to be you.
YDI for being a sucky kisser. Toss in a tug and I bet the phone would have been put away...
#182 - On 06/28/2009 at 10:17am by LikelyYourFake
YDI got being less interesting than bacon. Don't be suprised if he does it during sex too because you sound so pathetic by posting this. Get over it.
Lol, that sounds like the sort of thing I'd catch my boyfriend doing.
#185 - On 06/28/2009 at 11:21am by ArtandLove
hahahaha Oh that's one of the funniest FML's I've ever read. I can't really even add to that. Maybe photoshop a picture of him surrounded by bacon and give it to him for his birthday. Tell him you wanted to give him something really special.
#190 - On 06/28/2009 at 12:44pm by p00p0ster0us
Dude, bacon. Maybe he wanted to wrap you in bacon. Bacon, iPhone, and a girl....that's the life.
#192 - On 06/28/2009 at 1:46pm by Syncopations
haha, oh, gotta love boys. I've been told by a guy friend that making out gets boring after awhile for them. Which is fair, because after awhile, I get a little grossed out (with only a couple exceptions). He was probably bored and hungry haha.
By the way you could also take this as a hint to try and turn him on by doing a whipped cream bikini thing--except with bacon. He'd probably like that.
Next time he does that, just pull his pants off and move south. I think he's be more fixated on his wiener than bacon at that point.
Okay, I think I would be pretty pissed, but after about 2 seconds of being angry, I'd probably laugh and make some bacon :P All you have to do is laugh it off, but it is hilarious.
Dump him! He won't live past middle age with that bacon fixation.
#207 - On 06/28/2009 at 7:16pm by pinkpiggy77
Wow. That guy gets to make out while making the all important decision of what good food would become great by introducing bacon.
I want his autograph.
#211 - On 06/29/2009 at 1:30am by der_Jabberwhock
this guy rocks. the only thing better is eating baccon while making out
#214 - On 06/29/2009 at 9:16pm by person1234man
Dont make him choose between you and bacon.
You'll never win.
#218 - On 06/30/2009 at 2:30am by ediblebadger
LOL what a man. Suggest that he wrap you in bacon: might be what he was angling for.
#221 - On 07/01/2009 at 9:34am by godyourethick
Wow, this is so something my boyfriend would do. I know he'd never cheat on me. But looking up recipes for things wrapped in cured ham while in the heat of passion? Totally.
I feel for you, OP.
bahahaha ya my boyfriend would defnitely do this. its not that bad.
#224 - On 07/01/2009 at 6:38pm by potprincess
Hah! Wrapped in bacon... Talk about random xD my bf would do that too. It isn't tht bad... But still funny =]
that's freaking hilarious... I'm going to be a chef and I totally spend most of my time thinking up new dishes... I do feel bad though, but in all fairness it could have been some other chick and then what?
#227 - On 07/07/2009 at 12:08am by maestromiz
