Today, I met a great guy at the bar, and we went back to my place. He left before I woke up, leaving a badly-scrawled note saying, "Gone to work, call me!" I couldn't make out the number. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Hitting it off
Today, my friend and I went to a bar for drinks. I noticed this cute girl and went over to say "Hi." I had a great conversation with her and I asked for her number before she left. She passed it to me on a piece of paper with instructions specifying for my friend to call her and not me. FML
Today, I met a girl at the bar. Things were going really well and we ended up going back to her place. Problem? Her husband who normally works the graveyard shift was home sick. FML
Explain yourself
Today, I received a text message from my wife, who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends, saying, "I have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you in the morning." Umm… His? FML
Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. When it came time for us to leave, I saw him write something on the receipt for our waitress. I managed to get a quick look; it was his number. FML
Fat chance
Today, I left my number on my receipt for a cute waitress. As I was leaving the bar, she came running out and called me over. I obviously got excited. Turns out I'd forgotten to sign my slip. FML
Today, I woke up in bed with a one-night stand. We got really drunk the night before so I went to make a hangover-cure breakfast. Apparently he was so drunk that he didn't remember me, and when he came to the kitchen, he knocked me out with a pan and called the cops. FML
Today, I met a really cute guy at work. He asked for my number, and I wrote it down on a piece of paper. After looking at the paper, he crumpled it up, yelled "Do you think I'm stupid? I know the rejection hotline when I see it", and walked away. It was my real phone number. FML
Nice try
Today, while I was leaving a restaurant, the very handsome waiter, whom I had been trying to hit on all night, said to me, in front of everyone, "Why did you write your phone number on the table with hearts around it? You know I won't call you." FML
Today, my boyfriend didn't come home from a night of drinking with the boys again, so I told him that I was packing my things and I wouldn't be here when he came home. After all my things were packed, I realized he drove my car to the bar. FML
Top comments
kurodansei 16
You better figure it out!!! With hand writing like that you may have a Doctor on your hands!
uoeno_fml 20
Plot twist: he meant to make the note illegible.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (85)
zRatio 6
All about that chicken scratch
kurodansei 16
You better figure it out!!! With hand writing like that you may have a Doctor on your hands!
Tali147 16
It could be DocBastard!
Welshite 39
#14: Not every doctor mentioned is DocBastard.
DocBastard 38
Welshite - Don't be jealous. Tali - I seriously doubt it. I haven't had a one-night stand in Alberta since . . . Wait, what?
Zanquis 22
What is so hard? K so the hand writing sucks, but I am sure you can make out a few numbers, you know the amount of numbers and the few you cannot make out probably have only a few alternatives. My guess is worst case scenario you have to call a Thousand numbers, or you can just go the bar again, and if he is there again tell him. If he avoids said bar it is because he doesn't want to be called, if wants to be called he would also come to said bar.
grumblebum 16
Take the note to a pharmacy, they'll be able to read it.
Ali_Br_fml 33
What terrible luck OP, I really hope you find him... & Yeah 72, we usually can make out Doctors' chicken scratch because it's in a shorthand that we understand. Doctors can get away with scrawling: 1gtt OU Q4-6H PRN, and from that, we get: Instill 1 drop in both eyes every 4-6 hours as needed. We also have an idea what the directions for the drugs they prescribe should be... And we have the doctor's phone number just in case we can't read the drug name... (at least the hospital's phone number is supposed to be imprinted on each prescription.)
Horsempeg 25
He probably just wanted a one night stand..
jdeezy01 13
You don't say....
jdeezy01 13
At least he was the one that did the walk of shame.
Alexis2742 31
For men it's a victory walk
claiiire_fml 17
They went back to HER place. Of course HE did the walk.
Mr_Loudmouth 9
Doesn't matter. Had sex. I'm going to thumb myself down for this comment.
uoeno_fml 20
Plot twist: he meant to make the note illegible.
AlaskanG 27
Either not legible or illegible. Not "not illegible"
uoeno_fml 20
I misspelled note as not, ya dingus
AlaskanG 27
Ah. Note illegible. Sorry about that.
magiczebra 9
#9 Jacksfilms reference?
fucMyLifeSoHard 18
32- He might have done it so he didn't seem like a total douche, and made it seem like he wanted her to call him.
onlychildFTW 33
Yup, makes the guy look better as "I wanted you to call me; early mornings make writing bad." Everyone knows guys write it so you cant figure it out. I bet it onset even his number either.
whathefuckislife 11
my thoughts exactly.
with_teeth 14
Perhaps it was unreadable by design and the guy just wanted a one night stand.
alycion 38
So he doesn't look like the ass that didn't call if they bump into each other. It can now be turned into I didn't think you were interested since you never called and am now with someone sort of thing.
DREAMCATCHERoooo 4
I always have one question on my mind when I read stories like this. How can you bring a stranger into your home? I am not judging, just kind of curious. Perhaps I am a bit paranoid. I would be worried that he may steal, or try to kill me. Anyway, sorry you can't make out the number OP, better luck next time?
randomT 3
I think I'm paranoid as well cuz I can't bring a stranger to my flat or go to the flat of some guy I just met. anything can happen
DREAMCATCHERoooo 4
atleast I am not alone. :)
sammyjo06 14
Anyone could steal something or try to kill you. You're always taking a risk inviting someone into your home. Sure, maybe after meeting them in public a few times you're feeling comfortable enough to take them into your home, but you never know. Some guy you've dated for months might decide to hurt you, a friend you've known for years might be desperate enough to steal from you, and someone you met tonight might actually be an amazing person just looking to have mutual fun. You never know.
Voij 16
31: And if the person you met seems just that great, then they won't mind waiting at least for a first/second date before either home is visited, because they understand that a single random encounter at a bar is not enough to trust someone. Unless, of course, both of them were indeed just looking for some short "mutual fun"... which is something I highly doubt in the case of the OP, however, since she seemed to have wanted more out of it than just plain sex.
jazzy_123 20
11, well if I find the guy attractive... then that's a chance I'm willing to take! lol.
FlyingPie 17
If someone trusts a stranger enough to have sex with them, then it's not much of a stretch to invite them into his/her home.
NeDaroft 5
.
DocBastard 38
I wouldn't worry about the illegibility of the number. It's probably just the Rejection Hotline anyway.
asherm 15
It's amazing how many people don't know about rejection hotline
JhovannyA 7
Did you ever get the number right?
perdix 29
I can read it: it's 1-800-EAT-SHIT. Sorry :(
Kibaruto 33
Unless that's part of what they did that night, somehow I don't think that'd be the correct number.
kinky44 28
@23 Is that what you think? Well you may be on to something, its almost like that number was made up on purpose, for some reason. ( A joke)