Demon child

By PeanutlyDisabled - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 775
You deserved it 3 384

Same thing different taste

Top comments

..And this is the reason my husband may interact with our child, but not actually TEACH her anything. He'd do this, I know he would. FYL, she's too smart.

Comments

Reminds me of the Simpson episode.. Principal Skinner is allergic to peanuts, and Bart uses it against him.. Just like the kid you were babysitting.. But then Skinner went through Bart's records and found out he was allergic to Shrimp.. And Skinner used that against him.. Simple.. Fire fire with fire.. XD

I wouldve played with all her favorite toys

hellokittywhore 0

I'm starting a new babysitting job in 30 mins I hope that little bastard doesn't do the same to me!!! I'm alergic to shellfish. @b (does that look like a shellfish? that's what I was going for.)

Should go up anyways. She'll attack you and man, her life is ******. Or take pictures and tell her folks. Spread word and that bitch is ******.

Ouch. That's one harsh little kid. It's kinda surprising how evil they can be :P FYL

..And this is the reason my husband may interact with our child, but not actually TEACH her anything. He'd do this, I know he would. FYL, she's too smart.

Expertfail 0
Americunt 0

Just like my username, except this chick is Fritch Bitch. OP, why are you allgeric to nuts? How are you going to lose that virginity of yours when you're always sick around nuts? Anyways, when this girl turns like 14 or so, tell all the boys she secretly masturbates to lesbian ****.

daydreamstar 7

thats one twisted little girl... O.o and considering how you just met her, how could you deserve this. well, now tell her she has to clean it up or the evil peanut elves will snatch her away in the middle of the night and feed her to the troll broccoli monster!!! mwahaha! *cough* some kids just dont like strangers... :) and regarding the baseball bat, tell her that a giant bat will come for her unless she dosent hit you but im getting an awesome image of a 2 foot something kid in an army tank turrounded by a wall of peanut butter with a giant baseball bat and little three inch you, OP, just standing there with big eyes :)

really? I have an image of a 2 foot kid in a random pretsy dress with a massive baseball bat hitting op continuosly while ops on the floor shrieking.... :D

flashback.miss 28

lol but 7 was superior, 137 :)

The hilarity! what an evil kid. taking advantage of your weaknesses. i would hate to see what she does to her future ex boyfriends

Flutist 3

Their peanuts will be butter =)

Americunt 0

Crap, I was badded. Anyways OP, FYL, some kids are just born evil. I hope you told her parents.

If this is a real FML, don't you think you should have been supervising anything she was taking out of the pantry if you were meant to be babysitting her?

newsgit 0
Americunt 0

Stop being a ****. It's not like you're the one babysitting and you had peanut allergies.

No, it's not like that, you're right, because I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have allowed a kid I was babysitting to cover the floor in something fatal to me that would have taken a fair amount of time to spread and threaten me.

Americunt 0

Shove peanuts into your ****. If you think it's fake, or you're annoyed, then GET OF MAH INTERWEBZ!1!

I probably wouldn't get near a demon child with peanut butter if I wer fataly allergic she could probably put it on me I would just stay away

She was talking to the mom as the kid grabbed it

novemberlover 0

lmafo I feel kinda bad for you but that just gave me a new idea on how to get my sibblings to listen....

clever kid hahaha you should get a baseball bat and set her straight ;]