Today, I emailed 10 parents inviting them to my son's birthday party. All 10 emailed back saying their kids had to get a cavity filled. FML
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It was wild
Today, it was my daughter's 11th birthday party. One kid broke a vase, another lost a (baby) tooth, and two kids, including mine, tested positive for Covid. My kid parties harder than I ever have. FML
Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives in the cakes for my son's 7th birthday party. Over 40 kids came to the party. FML
Social distancing
Today, we celebrated our daughter's sixth birthday. Out of the 30 invited, 7 showed up. The last one to cancel this morning told us she was ill. My daughter was in tears as this meant the last remaining playmate couldn't come. My wife later saw her tagged on Facebook at another party. FML
Party hard
Today, I sent out a note to 300 friends saying that I'm having a birthday party in a couple of weeks. I asked to please write back if they are interested in coming. Two people replied. They said they can't make it. FML
Macabre date
Today, I had to go to a birthday party for 10 year-old triplets. They've all been dead for more than 9 years. FML
Family matters
Today, my husband sent an email invite to his family about our daughter's upcoming birthday. Upon reading the email, his aunt clicked "reply all" while emailing her husband and said, "I'd rather say we're out of town than see that dumb bitch our nephew calls his wife." FML
Today, I was uninvited from my own birthday party. FML
Thanks everyone
Today, I'd organized a small dinner with immediate family for my birthday. I’ve since received texts from every one of them, cancelling due to varying reasons. My parents excuse is the funniest - they went out last night for a coworker’s party, and don’t want to go out again tonight. For me. Their child. FML
Today, during my daughter's 8th birthday at a skating rink, a family showed up that didn't RSVP. The mother brought all 3 of her kids and left them at the party alone. She didn't feed them lunch and they followed me around the whole time asking for money. FML
Today, I had to go to the dentist to get 11 cavities filled. I took a wrong turn and ended up being 10 minutes late. My dentist told I had to reschedule because of his "10 minute policy." I have to wait 14 days now to get my cavities filled. FML
Top comments
Lauren324 18
Is it you or your kid that's the problem?
Bluekaren16 19
Maybe your previous parties gave them all cavities.
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Comments (129)
Bluekaren16 19
Maybe your previous parties gave them all cavities.
lambda_fml 40
OR they all could be planning a surprise party for the adorable child.
chlorinegreen 27
I don't think they would of left it a surprise for the parents too if it went that way.
Freethaawave 19
Maybe OP is a baker.
Lauren324 18
Is it you or your kid that's the problem?
Pleonasm 35
The one in their brains, OP.
picante72 24
Teenage lobotomy.
HowieDoIt 21
Your name is Paris...if that's where you live I can understand why everyone needs cavities filled ;)
StalkerChick 13
Umm, what?
Pleonasm 35
Something to do with French promiscuity, I think. Not very complicated, just use your imagination with the word cavities. I sure am.
HowieDoIt 21
No, feel free to bury...I realized too late the "don't brush your teeth" stereotype was british. I am now the stereotype of the uncultured american
gc327072 30
Don't brush your teeth.... Missouri? I thought that stereotype was for southern states, like Mississippi or Alabama.
TheDrifter 23
No, that's a no teeth to brush stereotype.
doodlecloud 26
I think you're an uncultured American because you still think Brits don't brush their teeth, not because you got the wrong country initally. We do, and actually, braces are free because of the NHS, so there aren't that many people with bad teeth over here I'm afraid lol.
HowieDoIt 21
That's why it's a "stereotype", not a fact. Just like not every meal in america is a cheeseburger lol
xXHollowIchigoXx 17
#67 In America, stereotyping other countries/cultures is part of our culture.
Poppipuff 14
70 I don't think anyone in Europe thinks americans just eat hamburgers. Stop stereotyping stereotypes.
klutz44 28
95 - I taught English in Korea for a year. My students thought I ate hamburgers and pizza for every meal. So maybe that's not a stereotype in Europe, but it is in Korea. Stop stereotyping Americans as the only ones that have stereotypes of other countries. Fun fact, they also thought I slept with my shoes on.
buddy51 23
Just like every comment on FML doesn't have to end with "lol", lol!
YepThatsMeee 23
#83 Indeed, and yet you wonder why everyone hates you
fergnasty 14
102- hate us as you may, our economy still drives your economy. So wish bad things on us, we have a recession and a drone missile coming your way.
Agore1 2
#104 really? You do realise that every single person, whether that be man, woman or child, owes $2905 EACH to china? And your total worldwide debt is 12.557 trillion. Your country, nor mine for that matter, hold the power anymore. They have to do whatever their debaters want them to.
tmmundy 17
43...I hate to inform you, but I live in Mississippi and I have always brushed my teeth twice a day, as well as my children, who are now grown. So don't stereotype if you don't know what you're talking about, thanks!
ChibiChibi_fml 27
The whole thing with a stereotype is that it is based in fact but is not actually fact. For example one of the more well known ones being that women are bad drivers. Everyone knows that not EVERY woman is a bad driver. However women, on average, do get into more accidents then men do. They just get into fewer lethal accidents. So the stereotype stands against women even though there are some awesome female drivers. Therefore it doesn't matter if you brush your teeth or not because you are but one person in a state full of people. You could, for all anyone really knows, be the exception and not the rule. One person can not a stereotype break.
_krystallynn_ 11
america has so many cultures and is so diversified, were probably one of the most cultured haha.
kewlkate 9
Actually, 110, there isn't any evidence backing that up what-so-ever. Women do, in fact, get into LESS accidents. It's just common belief that men have been and always will be better at the more masculine aspects of life, no matter the recklessness of their ways.
Coolaidegirl 18
if its any consolation most of the fml's are from the u.s so i think ur still ahead of the pack in that department
akiahara 14
What a popular day for the dentist.
Supergirl1988 16
Maybe there is a groupon!
TheSnakeDoctor20 17
Or a carpool!
woainishamu 21
Those parents must have a very active sex life.
woainishamu 21
Whoops, I read this FML wrong.
Pleonasm 35
Yes it said cavities being filled, not families being drilled.
woainishamu 21
Yea I realized my mistake but the editing time bomb blew up.
shorty6823 28
That's pretty crappy. Unless everyone hates your kid. But how can he not have one friend that likes him and would want to spend his birthday with him?
chlorinegreen 27
I'm guessing the child is young and the parents tried to invite the whole class. That's how it was when I was in school.
shorty6823 28
Just find it a little odd all 10 kids had cavities at the same time :O
andyyroxx 20
57- Nah, that's normal. Totally normal.
shorty6823 28
It's all just a plot against kids by dentists. Like that horror movie I saw about evil dentists.
BlueFlatts 20
Either that or the Tooth Fairy got angry at the last party.
shorty6823 28
The tooth fairy is an under cover dentist. She has to make money somehow to pay kids for their teeth.
hanymandy 6
Or the parents don't like him/his mom
Mossears133 15
Maybe the one kid that was actually his friend was the one real cavity excuse
happylappy 21
Writing an FML comment is a lot of pressure. All I can think of as I'm thinking to write a joke or a witty pun is:"oh god! They're going to thumb me down!" Maybe I'm just too stoned.
happylappy 21
a*
allie2590 31
Then why did you even write this comment?
Pleonasm 35
Reassurance maybe, like when a regular looking girl keeps yapping on about how she's sooo ugly. Attention. To look cool cos she's stoned maybe. Who knows? So many random posts on this site.
happylappy 21
Sure! I'll explain this to you to clear it all up. This is kind of irrelevant, but you did ask. Usually, when commenting I don't usually have a thought until I get to the comments box. Today after my waking-up morning activities I went on fml. When reading this, I had the urge to comment, but when I got to comments box; I got nothing. So in the end, all I could think of was what I commented, and in my opinion that was the best comment for me in that very moment of my life.
Pleonasm 35
.FML Couldn't resist, once I saw that "today" in the middle of your paragraph.
HowieDoIt 21
Go back to bed sir, and try again tomorrow.
Pleonasm 35
Madame ;)
happylappy 21
It's funny how whenever weed is mentioned the person automatically doesn't smoke weed, or just wants everyone to know. I feel that it would be a different situation it i somehow brought in alcohol, or a cigarette. I WAS just going to leave this alone, but I refuse to be "dissed" by an afro haired man(woman?) with a fake plastic moustache, and a color blind idiot. P.S. moustaches are amazing, but only when they're real, and on my lighter! Maybe you should grow one? It's understandable if your face is not capable of growing a manly moustache. Not every one can : )
Pleonasm 35
Took you 30 minutes to come up with that? Wasn't really worth it if you ask me.
happylappy 21
It didn't take 30 minutes. In that time I managed to make toast, butter it, boil water, pour it into favourite mug, make tea, enjoy it, and then comment back to you.
hunny797 5
Why are you trying so hard??
happylappy 21
I'm really not trying hard. In that last comment all I was doing was explaining that the above was wrong. It did not take 30 minutes to come up with a comment. It takes maybe one or two? Three minutes at the most.
ManInTheMachine 19
35-What the hell are you blathering about? You're the one that made the comment about being 'stoned', and when Pleonasm made a joke about it you go on the attack? That's pretty pathetic. The fact of the matter is, if you don't have anything good to say, or if you don't know what to say, don't bother commenting. If you see any issue with that, then this site very obviously isn't for you.
Pleonasm 35
Emeep erp Berp taloopa chuka
daniel_dd31 13
You feel pressured when writing a comment? Lol
akiahara 14
61: maybe it's the girl who was excited about Facebook likes.
laurencheese 7
I thought he was cool.
ICastillo 24
But what if all the kids are getting cavities filled and it just a coincidence that they're all on the same day...
igive 29
Either they are horrible people it you have a demon child.