Miscellaneous: Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding...

By NewBride - 14/08/2013 17:39 - United States - Lincoln

Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding and everything was going perfectly as planned. That is, until a bird flew over us and left a present right between my boobs. I had to stand at the altar for 30 minutes as bird poop melted in my cleavage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 831

You deserved it 5 591

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Same thing different taste

Wedding dress

By Anonymous - 24/01/2020 20:00 - Netherlands

Today, I walked down the aisle when a bug flew into my mouth. In a response, I threw up on my beautiful white wedding dress. I had to party and be in the pictures in someones spare pink dress for the rest of the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 238

You deserved it 265

Nervous?

By Anonymous - 28/02/2015 14:16 - Denmark - Nørresundby

Today, I sharted during my wedding vows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 717

You deserved it 5 135

By whatevershit - 13/05/2012 06:28 - United States - Theodore

Today, it was my wedding day. The best part was when we were taking photos and I threw up on my dress. At least the pictures were outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 292

You deserved it 3 011

By Kim422 - 28/06/2010 06:18 - United States

Today, I gave the toast at my sister's wedding which was outside. Before I started, the wind blew up my dress and wouldn't let up. Instead of giving my heartfelt speech, I spent five minutes fighting with my dress as 130 people pointed at my floral-printed underwear and laughed loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 992

You deserved it 4 598

By Oops - 18/11/2018 21:00 - United States

Today, I had diarrhea and shit myself. During my wedding. In my wedding dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 899

You deserved it 251

Check this out

By AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone - 13/12/2012 14:35 - Australia - Newport

Today, I finally got my wedding photos in the mail. As I looked through them, I soon realized that the lace material on my wedding dress was completely see-through in the sunlight, and my bra and panties were visible in every single outdoor photo. I had an outdoor wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 304

You deserved it 9 001

By DutchOven - 04/07/2009 21:07 - United States

Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 386

You deserved it 25 949

By Husband to be....maybe - 09/06/2018 09:00

Today, I found out I was allergic to bees, the hard way, at my wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 413

You deserved it 234

Classy

By 1234 - 11/07/2009 16:41 - Canada

Today, it was my wedding day. I had my butt clenched during the ceremony. I was giving my husband the ring, but dropped it. When I went to retrieve it, I let a huge one rip. My husband yelled, "She likes to eat beans." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 573

You deserved it 10 438

By bride - 27/03/2009 01:38 - United States

Today, I got married wearing a strapless dress. As I walked down the aisle, our wedding photographer stepped out behind me to get a shot of me approaching my husband. Instead of stepping out, though, he stepped on. Stepped on my dress. Pulling it completely down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133 957

You deserved it 10 278

Trivision 10

Thursday 15 August 2013 0:11

Well shit.

JustJumped 22

Thursday 15 August 2013 0:13

Surely someone had a tissue

Comments

fancyturdhat 11

Thursday 15 August 2013 2:18

birdie birdie in the sky. why'd you do that to my ... ****...?

Empoleon123 6

Thursday 15 August 2013 2:37

Well, shit

Rick1969 6

Thursday 15 August 2013 2:43

Sorry newbride, but i couldn't help but laugh at your predicament. lol

sassy2085 16

Thursday 15 August 2013 2:52

It is good luck to be left a present from a bird. It could be worse and dribbled down your hair.

nicholasj96 9

Thursday 15 August 2013 2:56

Because nobody had a tissue you could borrow

Coeliacchic93 21

Thursday 15 August 2013 2:57

Well you got your something new :) And very unexpected at that. Congrats on getting married :D

BugzBunni 1

Thursday 15 August 2013 3:10

Nailed it

TheWorldGreatest 8

Thursday 15 August 2013 3:18

I thought if you got shit on , that was good luck! Great luck on your marriage

thomcmoore 23

Thursday 15 August 2013 3:18

It...melted?

FlyingPie 17

Thursday 15 August 2013 3:23

You were dumped at your wedding.. :(

Keywords

Music Boredom Transportation Annoying Embarrassing Awkward Cars Family Babysitter Relatable Kids Money Thief Miscellaneous Food Farts Gross Health Depression Mental health Weird Creepy AITA Pregnancy Social Media Facebook Star Wars Wanker Work Bodyshaming

The Top

Today, my boyfriend got angry and threatened to dump me, all because I wouldn't give in to his demands not to go to a birthday sleepover with my friends. He seriously thinks it's going to turn into some kind of lesbian orgy and that I'll cheat on him. Thanks, PornHub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 387

You deserved it 7 199

Today, I told my stepdad 3 times not to unload my new stove by himself, being worried about both the appliance and his bad back. When I came back to the car two minutes later, he'd taken the stove out and was wondering where that huge scratch on the side might have come from. FML

I agree, your life sucks 817

You deserved it 90

The Top

Today, my mother in-law made dessert. It was a beautiful chocolate cake, chocolate cookies, and every other thing had chocolate in it. I'm deathly allergic to chocolate and she knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 682

You deserved it 3 684

Today, my husband has increasingly been asking for doggy style, which is not as romantic as missionary, so I asked him why the change. Apparently some of my pregnancy stretch marks make a goofy face and he can’t concentrate from trying to stop giggling, so his solution, flip me over and go at it from behind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 136

You deserved it 407

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend over text. We wore each others' hats, so I gave his back and asked for mine. He “accidentally” burned it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 730

You deserved it 458

Today, I had six long hours with the same math teacher. To get home, I travel by bus. Guess who sat down next to me for the whole trip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 33

Today, someone called the police on me because one of my students was going home with me every day. The student is my son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 828

You deserved it 1 435

Today, I once again asked my girlfriend about getting married, as she had previously said she would only get married once gay marriage was legal. She still said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 087

You deserved it 3 273