By SocialAnxietySucks - 26/03/2014 03:31 - United States - Houghton

Today, the clock in the study lounge was off, so I was half-an-hour late to class. I was too embarrassed to walk in late, so I sat for the next half-hour with my ear against the door trying to hear the lecture. People stopped to ask if there was something wrong with me. Yeah, probably. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 298
You deserved it 11 948

Same thing different taste

Top comments

And that wasn't too embarrassing? Just go into the lecture next time...

Don't worry, it's normal. I also did that once.

Comments

Don't worry, it's normal. I also did that once.

Breasts come in pairs... now I await the backlash

Grow some empathy, #6. She has social anxiety for gods sake! For those of you wondering- social anxiety is a mental disorder which causes you to have extreme and often irrational reactions of fear, stress, and anxiety in social settings or situations involving other people (especially strangers). OP's fear of walking into class late and having all eyes on her is a very common one, I've also missed classes because I couldn't make myself walk in late. OP- if your school has psychologists or therapists you should see one, they can help!

You have got to be kidding me! I have trouble being around large groups of people thanks to anxiety/ptsd from 2 deployments. I can't even walk down the street without getting borderline paranoid. Do I hide in my house though? No I go out and get shit done. I'll be damned if I'm going to let it stop me and you should get the same attitude.

#51, some people aren't so lucky. You know how everyone has different pain thresholds? The same holds true for mental disorders. Just because you can push through anxiety does not mean everyone else can. Anxiety's a disorder, and most people can will their way through it just as well as they can will themselves out of the flu. It just doesn't work like that. A positive attitude only goes so far. It's like telling someone with depression to just be happy already. There's something off in your body/brain, and that can't be cured with thought alone in most cases. It's great that your anxiety isn't debilitating, but don't judge someone if theirs is. You don't know what they've been through, and even if you did, you still have no place to judge.

61- Depression is a whole other situation. Depression is an imbalance in your brain, anxiety is all mental. It's only as debilitating as you let it be. I know how it feels to deal with it, you either push through it or succumb to it, but it is a decision either way. it doesn't magically go away, but you can learn to cope if you choose to do so. I'm not saying it's easy or anything, just that's its possible. being able to go to class to begin with proves that.

65- Depression is actually not "a whole other situation". What you're talking about is normal anxiety in a situation where anxiety is normal. The rest of are talking about anxiety DISORDERS which is a completely different thing. It's like the difference between saying you're depressed because something bad happened, and actually having clinical depression. Anxiety disorders are, in fact, also an imbalance in the brain, just like depression is. They are not "only as debilitating as you let them be". Try knowing what you're actually talking about before you look down on other people.

66-as someone who deals with it daily I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about. I'm not trying to look down on people and I'm sorry if it came across that way, but it doesn't make my point any less true. I could let my anxiety disorder rule my life and just avoid anything that triggers it, but I refuse to spend the rest of my life locked in my room. I choose to face it head on, and I want others to do the same. Sure that's not possible for a very small minority like my buddy that has severe ptsd and anxiety disorder. He freaks out every time he hears loud noises and spends the 4th of July doped up and curled in a ball just to make it through the night. He does what he can to be around people but he may never be able to go to the grocery store, is 100% disabled/medically retired from the army, and he's 25. if through all that he can put forth the effort to cope the best he can, nobody else has an excuse if you ask me.

I still think OP should've just gotten a bloody watch.

Actually, anxiety disorders are correlated with deficiencies of certain neurotransmitters in the body- namely GABA, serotonin, norepinephrine, and a few others. People can be genetically predisposed towards these deficiencies, so the severity of an anxiety disorder isn't exclusively influenced by experience. Granted, attitudes, diets, and actions (among others) can also influence neurotransmitter levels, so there are numerous ways people can try to overcome anxiety (pushing boundaries is one of them- that's a form of behavioral therapy). People whose daily lives are impaired by anxiety should speak with professionals to find the most applicable treatment pathways. And they should be able to do so without the judgement of others. Negative attitudes towards victims of really any disorder are likely to prevent people from seeking treatments, only causing further suffering.

And that wasn't too embarrassing? Just go into the lecture next time...

Agreed, it would have been less embarrassing to go in.

Yeah, but how many points would have been taken off if she didn't go in at all?

Some might consider what you did even more embarrassing..

Social anxiety, it's an actual disorder

"Disorder"..? It is something every person has to learn to deal with?... Calling it a disorder makes it sound like something more severe..

lexiieeex3 32

It IS severe. Hence the term "disorder."

kingdomgirl94 29

Its not just "oh this is uncomfortable" its more of "Holy **** Jesus Christ what do I do? people are watching me and laughing about me and whispering about me- no wait that's irrational... but what if they are?! God damn it why are they looking at me like that? They must think I'm such an idiot. I stand out like a sore thumb, I cant sit next to anyone, they don't want me near them, they already have their own friends to sit with... I shouldn't have even bothered to come to class... no one wants me here and now I can't even focus." Or along those lines anyways. Its extreme panic due to social situations that can be debilitating and make it hard to do anything or focus on everyday stuff because they feel so panicked. so I'd say disorder is pretty effective in relating how serious it can be for some people.

The above are correct but sitting outside being asked if you're ok is worse if you suffer from a social anxiety issue.

kingdomgirl94 29

As someone who suffers from anxiety, its actually easier to dismiss concerns for your own well being and dismiss individuals than it is to stand having large numbers of people watching you.

As someone who has social anxiety, I agree that it is easier to dismiss people that to go near them. Why? Personally, it's because people come to you, so you question less the interest they have in you. It's like ''they came to me, so it must mean that i'm not a bother because I'm not butting in'' But 2 seconds later, you think that they came near you either out of pity, or to make you realise your doing something bad or they want to go in class even if they are late but since you're stuck on the door, you're in the way and so on. It's hard to live like that, always thinking people want to ''attack'' you when it's all just in your head. I'm sorry if i'm not very clear, I'm speaking from personal experience :/

Let's not walk in and take a seat, let's sit at the door like a weirdo. You absolutely picked the least embarrassing option! Critical thinking skills unmatched!

Social anxiety = rational thinking goes out the window. If I were her and didn't want to get embarrased and get crippled by social anxiety I just wouldn't have gone to that lecture and tried to catch it up.

Sometimes the lecturers don't let you in if you are late. What OP did is not an unheard of solution. Many people would have just left and missed what could have been vital information.

Social anxiety... Yeah might be an explanation, if you weren't sitting with your ear pressed against the door where other people are looking at you and asking you what's wrong with you. People don't record lectures anymore? It always Made taking notes and reviewing later easier, that and if anyone skipped you could catch up easily.

lexiieeex3 32

People with Social Anxiety Disorder do not understand social cues. That's why OP had her head against the door. She thought it was a more viable option even though "normal" people would see it as the stranger of the two.

Social anxiety does not turn people into retards. It makes them avoid social interactions and especially embarrassment. Doing something that looks completely idiotic isn't a result of social anxiety, tripping, sweating, passing out, vomiting, sure. Making a choice to do the more embarrassing and socially awkward of two options, not so much. But I forget this is FML, the land of teenage shrinks and doctors. Where if you're fat it's all natures fault and if you do something stupid it's obviously not just being stupid.

#8, I'm happy to see that someone has some sense. I can't believe most of the FML community are actually defending the OP. Just because she has a "disorder" doesn't exclude her from the fact that she is an idiot.

lexiieeex3 32

55- Stop being so ignorant. People with REAL problems are diagnosed with REAL disorders. And don't use the word "retard." It's extremely offensive.

Everybody's late one time or another. It's better to be late then to never go in. Next time just walk in head high and take a seat. Simple as that

I would find that to be more embarrassing than walking in late to a class.

Don't be so hard on the OP, some professors are real bitches who give you a hard time if you ever walk in late

I have always HATED walking in late. everyone stares at you like they're trying to burn a hole through you and the teacher always says "OH LOOK WHO DECIDED TO SHOW UP TO CLASS" I'm sure anxiety issues make it ten times worse. Some people are rude on here.