Intimacy: Today, no matter how much I begged, my friend who'd locked himself...

By bob - 11/08/2011 12:56 - United States

Today, no matter how much I begged, my friend who'd locked himself away with my iPhone wouldn't stop taking pics of his penis and forwarding them to my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 990

You deserved it 5 473

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Same thing different taste

Hard to bare

By Anonymous - 03/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was showing my boss a picture on my phone. I didn’t expect her to take my phone from my hand and continue to flip through photos. I anxiously motioned for her to give my phone back, only to realize she had already swiped to my nude picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 009

You deserved it 783

By WTF?!?! - 09/09/2010 00:11 - United States

Today, I found out that I drunkenly texted my boss yesterday asking for nude pictures. He sent them. I'm afraid to go to work tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 824

You deserved it 40 357

By Rosie - 13/06/2012 16:07 - Germany - Wesel

Today, I woke up to the sight of my boyfriend playing a game on my iPhone with his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 366

You deserved it 5 242

By Jmdezy - 05/04/2016 15:45 - United States

Today, I was drunk and sent my friend a picture of my penis. He edited the picture and put hands and sunglasses on it before sending it to practically everyone I know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 778

You deserved it 24 239

By Scarlett - 16/02/2013 06:03 - Canada - Barrie

Today, while I was babysitting, the little girl wanted to show me a picture that her mom had just sent to the family iPad via iMessage. Trying to be helpful, I clicked iMessage, only to see pictures of her father's erect penis. She won't stop asking about the "hotdog" in the picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 810

You deserved it 3 599

My wife

By Michael D. - 25/08/2012 16:06 - United States - Duluth

Today, while I was at work, my wife sent me a few pictures of her in a new lingerie, to "spice up" my day. She didn't realize that I have iCloud turned on so I can share files with my colleagues. My boss and a dozen other employees received the same pictures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 835

You deserved it 27 107

By Liz - 27/09/2010 19:30 - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend had his phone taken away by his dad for this past week. I have been sending him naked photos and other naughty things this entire week, or so I thought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 465

You deserved it 40 064

By Female_Lucifer - 20/10/2013 13:02 - United States - New Lebanon

Today, my father was taking pictures of my friend and me as we got ready for homecoming. After the pictures were taken, he offered to show us. He scrolled one picture too far and ended up showing us a picture of his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 358

You deserved it 5 167

By hb1 - 04/06/2016 18:15 - United Kingdom - Middlesbrough

Today, I caught my "best friend" on my laptop, copying my girlfriend's nudes onto his flash drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 716

You deserved it 3 148

By ikickgingers - 19/10/2011 16:49 - United States

Today, I found out my boss and some employees on my floor have bets placed on who can get the best picture of my ass. I found out when one of the pictures was accidentally sent to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 608

You deserved it 4 068

sailorzoe 14

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:19

Fired, or possibly a raise?

RodStar 0

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:19

What if you're boss liked the pictures? O__o

Comments

lokrar789 7

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:23

Hehehehehe ur screwed

Wirbelwind 2

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:24

Kick his ass. Truthfully, he deserves worse (?_??)

SeasonedLemur 5

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:25

should have shat through the key hole.

johnnyboy12396_fml 4

Friday 12 August 2011 0:20

In a bathroom where his friend has acces to a camera and his boss's email ? Really think that's a good idea ?

TheFakeFamilyGuy 9

Friday 12 August 2011 11:06

Lmfao.

angieintn 1

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:25

Just lie and say your phone was stolen. Technically it was temporarily stolen.

RyNo24 4

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:26

Your friend is a dick (no pun intended) lol

jlh2283 1

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:26

Sounds like a bad friend and he seems immature... He doesn't care about you either...

DeathBunny218 37

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:30

i bet you won't be complaining if you get a promotion and a big bonus in the near future :P

DarwinWillFixIt 11

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:30

Time to lock you phone and maybe time to find a new "friend"

lilmommy16 0

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:31

Maybe next time you shouldn't let him use your phone?

wild_n_out 8

Thursday 11 August 2011 23:41

*girth

V19Spartan 1

Thursday 11 August 2011 19:32

Let us hope that your boss will be impressed by his sheer gerth

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Today, I met up with a guy from Bumble for a first date. An hour in, he asks me, "What's your take on body odor?" He proceeds to tell me about his intimate relationship with his body odor and how his armpits take on the scents of his lovers' lady bits. He added that the "essence" of his ex often returns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 61

Today, I found out my psycho ex also reads FML. She called me at work, pissed that I'd "publicly humiliated" her on here. I haven't posted about her at all. I'm sure the brick I found thrown through my window a few hours later has nothing to do with her, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 736

You deserved it 1 428

The Top

Today, my cat let a mouse sit on his paws for several minutes, then just sat and watched as it scurried into a crack in the drywall. My cat is only 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 921

You deserved it 345

Today, I discovered that sitting in the back of your car from 8-9 p.m. talking with a friend in a park area is suspicious enough behavior to have cops called on you, then for backup to arrive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 577

You deserved it 5 237

Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 711

You deserved it 1 847

Today, at my mother's funeral, as everyone was around her casket for the viewing, my 5-year-old son in cluelessness of what was going on shouted, "Grandma is more fun when she isn't sleeping." Everyone cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 512

You deserved it 3 978

Today, I should be working on my big project for work due next week. Instead, I'm walking in and out of the block to get all my things from my flat. My roommate lied about paying the rent for months now and has actually spending all the money on lotto tickets. And no, he didn't win anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 573

You deserved it 770

Today, I went for my follow-up appointment with my surgeon. He walked into the room and said, "I thought you died." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 383

You deserved it 1 973

Same thing different taste

Hard to bare

My wife

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