Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend and I were sitting downstairs with my mom....

By Tucker - 18/11/2009 21:35 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were sitting downstairs with my mom. We heard the dog running around upstairs and called it down. It came running down the stairs. With a used condom in its mouth. The same condom my girlfriend and I lost two weeks ago. It put it directly in my mom's hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 451

You deserved it 8 785

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Same thing different taste

By PCJJacket - 05/05/2014 17:30 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I had sex with my girlfriend while my parents were out. After they got home, my dog brought out our used condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 202

You deserved it 26 141

By ash - 04/01/2011 21:09 - United States

Today, was my boyfriends last night visiting my family. My dog decided to go through the trash, then ran up to my dad with one of our used condoms caught on her teeth. My parents didn't even know we were sleeping in the same room. They know a lot more now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 896

You deserved it 14 831

By badluckdrew - 01/05/2009 14:28 - United States

Today, my girlfriend's mother called her in the bedroom for a serious talk. I overheard them arguing and yelling at each other. It turns out her mother found a condom next to her garbage. We got caught because her cat swallowed the condom and threw it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 556

You deserved it 20 633

By Anonymous - 15/01/2011 10:19 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my girlfriends house. After having sex, we went downstairs to where the rest of the family was. At this point I did not realise that I had a used condom stuck to my foot. The family did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 894

You deserved it 40 454

Missing

By Anon - 04/08/2013 05:36 - Australia - Perth

Today, my girlfriend's dad pulled out the chocolate-flavoured condom that went missing under the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 644

You deserved it 20 277

Gettin' some

By Username - 01/05/2011 08:20 - United States

Today, I grabbed my t-shirt off the floor beside the bed and got up to walk my boyfriend's dog. After several trips around the block, and plenty of strange looks, I got back upstairs and saw the used condom stuck to my sleeve from the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 502

You deserved it 46 390

By Anonymous - 30/12/2018 06:00 - Australia - Carlton

Today, I found the remnants of a condom in my dog’s poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 414

You deserved it 394

Rushed

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 20:53 - Canada - Courtenay

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 660

You deserved it 44 684

Why would you stick that there?

By Co-B - 03/09/2009 20:59 - United States

Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 872

You deserved it 61 034

Great start to the day

By Anonymous - 04/04/2021 20:00

Today, I went into my parents' room after spending pretty much all weekend in my their bed while they were out of town. I happened to look out the window, and on the windowsill was a puddle of cat vomit with a condom in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 272

You deserved it 754

gollygoshers 0

Thursday 19 November 2009 2:31

How the hell do you LOSE a condom? Did you try to throw it out a window but it fell halfway through the process or something?

perdix 29

Thursday 19 November 2009 3:23

And the dog said, "Here, boss, here are your grandkids!"

Comments

larcenousturco 0

Friday 20 November 2009 7:42

Did you lose it in her ******? YDI... Throw it in the trash, jackass...

cruise09 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 18:31

woooow. why the hell wouldnt you throw the thing away. like seriously?

abbylolz 0

Wednesday 25 November 2009 18:47

Ya like were could u have put it?? The dog proboly found it still lying on the bed YDI for not be careful

beepbeepbeep829 0

Sunday 29 November 2009 8:15

you dumb ****, thats what a trash can is for

TehOnionUser 0

Friday 4 December 2009 17:08

YDI it, if you even can't properly do simple hygienic activity like trowing trash in trash can.

kandam808 0

Sunday 20 December 2009 13:48

how do u lose a condom O_O

queenconeja 0

Thursday 24 December 2009 16:38

well i give you 2 points for using condoms in the first place, cuz if u 2 can misplace it for 2 weeks..then u seriously dont need to be having children..ever!

delfoxio 0

Friday 8 January 2010 12:39

BS, there was one just like this with a vibrator a couple weeks ago. either dog-evolution has changed so that they now go hunting for sex objects and return them to the woman of the house, or this is bullshit