By Mewsmash - 01/01/2016 16:23 - United States - Dublin

Today, my father told me he hasn't brushed his teeth for 30 years: he just wipes them with paper towels. I don't know whether to be horribly disgusted, or horribly jealous that he has never gotten a cavity. FML
I agree, your life sucks 21 275
You deserved it 1 546
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Top comments

LadyKayDee 23

I would be horribly disgusted. That's gross

230 5
CODplayer4lyfe 24

Maybe it's just me, but wouldn't wiping your teeth down with paper towels be more involving and possibly time consuming than a quick brush?

208 10

Comments

jlang917 14

That is disgusting, you should keep doing what you're doing OP

8 17
hoosiergirl94 31

Dirty mouth? Clean it up with Orbitz!

43 10
JMichael 25

No clean it up with Bounty! Bounty clears stains better than the leading brand!

51 5
KhaleesiDannie 26

And more teeth cleaned per roll

30 2
youngmessi252525 20

I mean if it gets the job done who cares how he does it

16 38
SecundusSecunda 27

Because it's unhygienic, I really doubt it gets the job done. This FML reminds me of the other FML of the grandma that never wiped her butt after defecating and let "nature handle things"

30 2
mds9986 24

It's clearly not unhygienic if he doesn't get cavities.

6 5
catherinecas 30

But the dad could have gingivitis, gum disease, and all sorts of nasty shit in his mouth. Not having cavities doesn't mean a healthy mouth

11 1
Verthandin 15

Thing is that if your mouth is unhygienic it will also make you more vulnerable against infections and just the a normal cold

1 1
SecundusSecunda 27

#50, what about the bacteria on his tongue? Does he wipe his tongue with paper towels also? It's unhygienic.

2 1
Railroader 16

is this called biting satire?

17 3
StupidUsername89 23

Hey, if it really works I might give it a go.

14 6
xxsakuraxx 29

For the love of all that it good and holy, please don't! Imagine how bad this dude's breath must stink!

2 2
atomicxsarah 17

He's lucky! I brush and floss twice a day and have 2 cavities. Maybe he doesn't eat much sugary foods and drinks.

37 2
ThePez828 18

YOU are lucky, haha. I brush and floss everyday yet I have had more cavities than can be counted!

7 1
CODplayer4lyfe 24

Maybe it's just me, but wouldn't wiping your teeth down with paper towels be more involving and possibly time consuming than a quick brush?

208 10
Feklfekl2222 32

It's possible that he feels brushing hurts his gums too much, or some other problem he specifically has with brushing rather than an issue with how long it takes

7 1
katachristic 19

No, it only takes like five seconds. That's what I do after lunch at work and when I stay at someone else's place unexpectedly and didn't bring a toothbrush. I wouldn't recommend it as a complete substitute for brushing, but it's actually pretty effective in a pinch, especially if your host has floss.

13 2
jen1097 25

I feel sorry for the people who speak to him. The smell of bacteria would be so overwhelming. Please buy this man a mouthwash if he refuses to brush omg

24 0
TWayne95 13

If you never brush your teeth then your body does all the work and does what it's meant to do. Think of it like wearing an ankle brace. If you wear an ankle brace for a year your body will get used to having that support and not having to do anything so when you take the brace off your ankle will be super weak. Same concept for everything.

5 6
kindasortayeah 25

Well, by wiping his teeth, he's actually removing most of the bacteria. When you brush your teeth, you don't kill any bacteria, just remove them from the surface. In a way, he is doing the same thing, just not nearly as thorough as brushing your teeth. Although I do agree, that is pretty nasty.

11 4