Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up to a stranger in my dorm room. He was naked... - FML

By thewallrules - 05/12/2009 14:10 - United States

Today, I woke up to a stranger in my dorm room. He was naked and was peeing into my water bottle. He kept asking for Chris. I have no idea who Chris is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 972

You deserved it 3 451

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By gold3nshow3r - 09/03/2017 20:00 - United States - Roanoke

Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 564

You deserved it 434

By breeeeeh - 21/06/2013 22:18 - France - Brou-sur-chantereine

Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 679

You deserved it 69 921

Spooky

By Scaredwitless - 28/01/2011 04:35 - United States

Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 901

You deserved it 6 012

By CollegeFreshman - 11/09/2009 04:20 - United States

Today, I heard a knock on my door and, thinking it was my student adviser, opened it. I was greeted by a drunk girl, who pushed her way into my dorm room, informed me that she lived here last year, and then told me that she lost her virginity in my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 600

You deserved it 3 738

By Anonymous - 09/10/2009 22:58 - United States

Today, I was at a local club with my friends sitting at a table when some guys approached us. One of them started telling me about his recent adventures through Europe and was very interesting. Something warm hit my leg and I realized the guy was urinating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 470

You deserved it 2 801

By nude - 15/01/2010 00:43 - United States

Today, I woke up in my boyfriend's dorm and decided to take a shower before he woke up. I used the girls bathroom on the above floor, and afterwards just threw on a towel and ran to the elevator. I forgot to press my boyfriend's floor and I was taken to the lobby in a towel. People were waiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 048

You deserved it 32 275

Creeped out

By HadToApologize - 03/11/2009 05:20 - United States

Today, I took a shower at my girlfriend's apartment. I was wandering around, gathering my clothes when I noticed my girl doing her hair in the other room. She looked sort of peculiar, so I stood there, studying her. Half naked. I then realized it wasn't my girlfriend, but her roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 371

You deserved it 23 060

By whymyroomthough - 06/08/2014 22:18 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 190

You deserved it 3 223

By TJ - 07/01/2010 16:50 - India

Today, my friend whacked me on the family jewels while I was washing my hands in the college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 228

You deserved it 2 996

Never in the buff

By ShyVirgin - 19/06/2021 05:01 - United Kingdom - Derby

Today, a staff member entered my room, thinking it was empty. I was naked. This is the second time something like this has happened in the week I have lived here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 106

Next

Top comments

xdyingxwishx 0

Saturday 5 December 2009 19:54

Haha damn, lock your door!

monkey314159 0

Saturday 5 December 2009 19:55

wtf... which college is this again?

Comments

agsilver 14

Sunday 17 April 2011 14:35

phsyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyycoooooo

vistamar 3

Monday 2 May 2011 4:37

probably a college in Iowa or Idaho or Illinois they have the highest teen pregancy rates.

kelseysking 26

Tuesday 7 October 2014 22:12

It says they're from North Dakota.

TheCube 6

Saturday 2 July 2011 20:48

Uh...

PenguinLover32 0

Tuesday 12 July 2011 21:41

hahahahahaha sucks to be you

tyler8775 4

Monday 19 September 2011 9:16

That's scary! Haha

Croco83 7

Thursday 5 January 2012 20:20

Wesker? *sigh* What are you doing, Wesker?

The_9th_Doctor 18

Wednesday 4 September 2013 3:45

he was looking for me apparently

funturtle23 6

Friday 21 February 2014 10:08

College ly43

Pelpa 6

Sunday 27 July 2014 16:54

Hey Chris I have your drug test! Wrong room? ...sorry

JakeHatchette 7

Wednesday 19 November 2014 21:20

Meth, it's a helluva drug

3
4
5
6
7

Keywords

Awkward Love Embarrassing Public freakouts Family Weddings AITA Bodyshaming Transportation Cops Cars Kids Sexism Work Relatable Mental health Growing old Health Animals Cats Periods Job interview Education Instagram Social Media Stalker Phobias Spiders Ironic Bikes

The Top

Today, after work, I was saying goodbye to my last remaining friend I worked with because she was going to be leaving for college. My manager saw me talking and made me clock back in and work, because, "If you have time to talk, you have time to work." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 642

You deserved it 1 249

Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 057

You deserved it 2 533

The Top

Today, I went in my car to a very important job interview. I was out of gas, so I had to get some on the way. When i was done pumping, I went to get back in and the door handle broke off on the driver's side. Then I blew a tire on a piece of metal. Needless to say, I lost my chance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 328

You deserved it 203

This is why man won't take off the jacket!

I agree, your life sucks 197

You deserved it 282

Today, I found out that sex in the woods is amazing. I also found that the roar of a nearby bear will end the amazement. Not only was I cockblocked by a bear, I almost shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 804

You deserved it 7 222

Today, I was informed that- despite an already skeletal staff- my supervisor is leaving the company. Tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 366

You deserved it 316

Today, I admitted to my parents that I'm a pathological liar and I would like to go get help. They didn't believe me, and told me stop making stuff up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 156

You deserved it 7 127

Today, I was interviewed by a WalMart employee for a position in their pharmacy. I didn't get the job. I was more qualified than the woman who gave me the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 718

You deserved it 324