Miscellaneous: Today, I was talking with my father on the phone when I mentioned...

By halebop - 06/04/2009 05:26 - United States

Today, I was talking with my father on the phone when I mentioned I wanted to stay at school over the summer and work. He asked if it would be lonely with the campus empty, when I replied that my friends would be working here too. He asked: "What, all two of them?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 705

You deserved it 5 171

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Same thing different taste

By recordyear - 09/08/2011 07:32 - United States

Today, I was at work with my dad. He told me the only reason he's letting me work with him over the summer is because I'm a friendless loser, and he didn't want me staying home getting fatter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 883

You deserved it 7 514

By AllieG33 - 05/09/2014 02:59 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, after returning from taking my sister off to college, my parents told me that our house would be a lot quieter with my sister gone. Not because she's loud, but because she has friends and I apparently don't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 664

You deserved it 3 711

Teenage kicks

By Anonymous - 24/04/2022 10:00 - Australia - Albany Creek

Today, I found out that ALL of my friends were in the same class and I was in a different one. They went away on camp, and I'm going to be alone for this whole week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 744

You deserved it 124

Helicopter parents

By that girl. - 06/06/2012 05:26 - United States

Today, instead of having my friends come pick me up, my dad drove me over to visit them. He insisted on walking me up to the door, hugging me goodbye, and making sure my friends were appropriate enough to hang out with. I'm in college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 526

You deserved it 3 554

Priorities

By ill - 02/10/2009 17:18 - Canada

Today, I called my dad to ask why my university tuition had not been paid. He said that my school was "too expensive" and he "couldn't afford it." He then asked me if I would take in his mail while he was away. He was taking his new wife to Hawaii; apparently it's beautiful this time of year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 596

You deserved it 3 612

By Anonymous - 26/09/2014 20:00 - United States - Schaumburg

Today, I got back home from work and casually asked my dad "What's up?" He casually replied: "Wishing I'd had a son instead." and stared glassy-eyed at me until I left the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 004

You deserved it 3 024

By Lonely626 - 16/06/2016 22:26

Today, while talking with a coworker, we discussed a weekend home invasion scenario. It was then that I realized my social circle is so non-existent, that my job would notice I'm gone before my friends would. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 933

You deserved it 1 259

Seems unlikely

By Anonymous - 30/07/2021 22:01 - United States - Brookville

Today, I teasingly asked my crush why he never came to visit me in my dorm. He said that all his friends there had moved out and gotten apartments, so he had no reason to go to my dorm. Oh. I thought we were friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 831

You deserved it 141

Keeping it real

By Anonymous - 26/02/2016 08:37 - Australia - Wilston

Today, I went to visit my dad for the first time in over a year, as I have been studying for my Master's degree in history halfway across the world. The first thing he said to me? "So, gotten a real job yet?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 738

You deserved it 3 308

Benjamin Button

By TooYoungForThis - 03/09/2019 20:00

Today, my father was helping me move into college. When we arrived, the students helping people move in mistook me for one of the parents. I’m 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 551

You deserved it 142

briedis 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:24

It's better to have two close friends than 10 friends who later turn out to be assholes :)

Ib83 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:15

ummmmmmmmmmm sounds like he was just teasing. not really an FML

Comments

manderz581 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:09

haha thats a nice dad you have there. first!!

ffmmllyaya 0

Tuesday 6 April 2010 2:07

two friends is plenty if they r good

JennyyBennyy 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:15

haha that is soo something my dad would say..

ZleveL 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 7:28

same but my dad said it in front of my friends rofl

Ib83 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:15

ummmmmmmmmmm sounds like he was just teasing. not really an FML

420hiadventurer 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:21

hahahahaha he's joking. Don't be so sensitive.

UnCensoredBitch 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:21

HAHAHA! BURN!

briedis 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:24

It's better to have two close friends than 10 friends who later turn out to be assholes :)

BadPinkKitty07 0

Friday 16 April 2010 6:36

I completely agree

Dr_Awesome654 24

Monday 8 August 2016 8:00

But it's not as good as having 10 close friends ( ಠ ͜ʖರೃ)

reset_button 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:26

I say FYL because you can't take a joke

BigLord 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:34

This probably is a FML because it was meant as a joke but the OP realized it's true :/ heh....

monzie94 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:36

LMAO. i agree with number 6

genius_man16 0

Monday 6 April 2009 16:46

#7 i saw that the OP deserves it for the same reason

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The Top

Today, after getting ghosted by a company for a job I really wanted, I posted on LinkedIn, venting my frustration with companies not having the decency to send rejection letters. My current boss, who didn't know I was job hunting, saw it, and let me know I'm now on the shit list. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 905

Today, my best friend got a new boyfriend. She asked him what he wanted for his upcoming birthday, and he said he just wanted to hang out with her and watch a movie or two. I thought it was sweet, so I asked my boyfriend what he would like for his upcoming birthday. He said a blow job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 183

You deserved it 47 587

The Top

Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 593

You deserved it 5 816

Today, during my fourth solo day working as a meter-maid, I had a vehicle towed for being parked in front of a fire hydrant. The vehicle belonged to the governor. I'm scared to even show my face at work next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 333

You deserved it 4 866

Today, it's my first day of high school. It's also my first day of a three-day in-school suspension. The reason? I sat next to a girl and she immediately got up and told the teacher that she didn't "feel safe". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 927

You deserved it 216

Today, I finally had it out with my abusive father. I spent almost an hour detailing about how he constantly humiliates me in public, treats me like slime, and hits me at random when he's in a bad mood. His response was, "Quit being such a wimp" because I'm "not female." Mom took his side. I'm 16 and can't move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 643

You deserved it 90

Today, I finally had the chance to have sex with my crush. Too bad I couldn't get an erection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 207

You deserved it 1 779

Today, I passed my driver's test. My instructor took the learner signs off his car and let me drive back to my place. I guess he didn't bet on me crashing the car just a few blocks from the test center. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 443

You deserved it 5 725

Same thing different taste

Teenage kicks

Helicopter parents

Priorities

Seems unlikely

Keeping it real

Benjamin Button

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