Love: Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with...

By Anonymous - 22/10/2011 06:10 - United States

Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 613

You deserved it 53 626

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Poor little guy

By Anonymous - 04/03/2021 14:01

Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 924

You deserved it 155

Jealous much?

By Anonymous - 09/02/2010 06:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told my hamster he loved her. Repeatedly. In 'cute' baby voices. He has yet to say it to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 362

You deserved it 5 778

Halitosis

By Anonymous - 13/10/2021 20:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 275

So…

By Anonymous - 29/03/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 752

You deserved it 7 619

By GasAttack - 07/09/2009 13:32 - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 455

You deserved it 8 529

By traumatised - 11/10/2009 16:16 - United Kingdom

Today, my new roommate decided to put his pet hamster in the same cage as my beloved hamster. Apparently he wanted them to make hamster babies. They are both males. His hamster attacked mine and tore it to pieces. I just finished cleaning up the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 470

You deserved it 2 790

By Cheese4men - 14/05/2010 23:28 - Canada

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend saying, "I shall be the prince, and you shall be the princess," to his hamster. Once he saw me, he quickly turned to the hamster and said, "I have to go. The dragon is here." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 608

You deserved it 8 768

By HaleyIsabelle - 08/03/2010 20:54 - France

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 449

You deserved it 3 710

By zac545 - 19/02/2009 06:14 - United States

Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 948

You deserved it 11 230

The Taste of Love

By Anonymous - 05/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 486

You deserved it 308

laurabev 9

Saturday 22 October 2011 12:16

Why would you suck on his fingers??

peete182 0

Saturday 22 October 2011 12:20

Dont suck things that have been holding hamsters

Comments

hyden121 2

Sunday 23 October 2011 8:24

You did not notice anything strange when you started sucking on his fingers?

lizard399 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 8:31

You deserved that.. and it made me laugh. You dummyyy, seriously?

babypookerooni 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 9:34

That's supposed to be cute???...

rastafunk 0

Sunday 23 October 2011 21:38

Ew sucking fingers?

thejedi08 10

Monday 24 October 2011 0:35

i was about to say "define hamster" til i saw the second part... YDI!

Allyrocks113000 0

Saturday 31 December 2011 18:45

Lol, nice way to think :P

coolcat10 0

Monday 24 October 2011 4:48

Why is he sticking his fingers in pee?

Pslcybn5 7

Monday 24 October 2011 4:55

And now you know how bad it tastes!

sassyangel24 0

Monday 24 October 2011 5:46

How. The. ****. Is. That. Cute? I mean your boyfriend just wanted to show you how bad it smelled, you wanted to tell him how bad it tasted.

jwktheman 6

Tuesday 25 October 2011 16:26

who the f*** thinks its cute to suck someones fingers, this isn't an fml its a fail

superpoptart 24

Wednesday 26 October 2011 7:54

How the hell is sucking fingers cute...

kitsune3 20

Saturday 5 November 2011 23:47

Because a lot of guys get turned on by having their fingers sucked. It reminds them of the feeling of having something ELSE sucked...

Keywords

Embarrassing Facebook Work Social Media Virginity Intimacy Sex Health Painful School Love Tinder Awkward Dating Anxiety Relatable Skincare Sextoys Poopoo peepee Art Kids Birthday Covid Relationship advice Transportation Cars Family Gross Neighbours Lonely

The Top

Today, on my friend's birthday, I met a guy I really liked at a club, and he asked me to go home with him. At 2 a.m., my friend called but I missed her calls. When I woke up, she'd texted me pictures of all my things that I had at her place thrown outside in the snow. All because I didn’t go home with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 577

You deserved it 1 204

It's great to see you ! How was july ? Hot, sweaty, flirty ? How I miseed talking to you (and getting one or two comments if we're lucky enough). But let's not complain, a whole month welcoming artists for their second rounds who gave us brand new il...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 9

The Top

Today, my girlfriend and my parents staged an intervention, and have asked me to go to rehab. What they want me to go to rehab for? World of Warcraft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 865

You deserved it 68 234

Today, I tried to explain to my 23-year-old boyfriend the difference between "your" and "you're". I do this every other day, but it's like his head is permanently stuck in the first grade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 140

You deserved it 6 909

Today, I snuck downstairs to watch a midnight movie. One moment I'm trying to plug my headphones in, in the dark, and the next my dad's beating the shit out of me with a baseball bat. Turns out he snuck down after me for a midnight snack and thought I was a burglar disconnecting the TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 176

You deserved it 5 299

Today, without even trying, I convinced my 17-year-old daughter that blueberries are just peas holding their breath. I have raised a complete airhead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 472

You deserved it 70 747

Today, at a hard rock concert, a bunch of guys accidentally knocked down a port-a-potty while moshing. I was inside that port-a-potty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 238 876

You deserved it 21 088

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 595

You deserved it 3 293