Love: Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought... - FML

By Anonymous - 18/09/2011 21:24 - United States

Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought I was her ex-boyfriend. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 376

You deserved it 4 436

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Dumped - 22/12/2009 07:57 - United States

Today, I was going on a date with my girlfriend. When I took her home, her sister came to the door. I used to date her sister and I didn't know they were related. My girlfriend realized this, then kicked me in the crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 092

You deserved it 11 667

By filipinoclari808 - 16/04/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 789

You deserved it 81 425

By Ari - 16/06/2011 04:19 - United States

Today, a man came up to me and punched me in the face. He turned out to be the guy my ex-girlfriend cheated on me with. Apparently, she told him we broke up because I used to beat her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 865

You deserved it 3 711

By Anonymous - 04/03/2010 00:36 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be amusing to sneak into my room and jump me in my bed. Too bad that when she jumped, one of her knees landed on my crotch. I haven't been able to walk properly since this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 674

You deserved it 3 093

By ouch - 29/03/2011 03:33 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 643

You deserved it 16 847

By Anon - 09/01/2013 19:27 - United States - Southbury

Today, I was laughing at a girl who really sucks at badminton. Turns out she has anger issues, and a really good aim when she's mad. I've never been hit so hard in the crotch before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 525

You deserved it 64 250

By Anonymous - 14/01/2014 16:15 - United Kingdom - Chester

Today, I was laying down with my girlfriend, when she asked me if I'd ever been kicked in the junk. I awkwardly said no, and she replied, "Well maybe that should change." while rubbing my shoulder lovingly. I'm scared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 967

You deserved it 4 968

By thatCanadianGuy7 - 29/06/2009 19:55 - Canada

Today, I got beaten up by my ex-girlfriend's older brother who does mixed martial arts, because my ex saw me making out with another girl. We broke up over 6 months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 953

You deserved it 5 041

By Annoymous - 03/09/2009 10:19 - Australia

Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 489

You deserved it 5 805

By Anonymous - 12/08/2012 09:23 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was watching a movie alone with my girlfriend. She shifted positions as I put my arm around her, and ended up kneeing me in the crotch and shouldering me in the throat simultaneously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 143

You deserved it 2 360

Next

Top comments

twinny_sc 13

Monday 19 September 2011 1:30

****** kick!

heilheather 7

Monday 19 September 2011 1:34

**** punt!

Comments

Glitterhinoceros 14

Monday 19 September 2011 1:37

O-o-o-ovary kill.

RebekahBrooke 9

Monday 19 September 2011 3:41

lol. first original one I've seen

Doddoss 1

Wednesday 5 October 2011 3:58

Awesome, just awesome.

Brooding99 15

Monday 19 September 2011 1:39

Reason 159 that "pixie cuts" don't work dude.

fuzz97 23

Monday 19 September 2011 1:40

Unless she's really butch.

MangoRico1 1

Monday 19 September 2011 1:40

Is your name Chaz ?

pinecone1414 6

Monday 19 September 2011 1:45

Oooo. Well I think that on this situation you should be grateful you're not a man.

mrahhhhh 21

Monday 19 September 2011 1:45

That's my purse! I don't know you! There's a reference behind that, so don't assume its a non-sequitor and thumb me down for it.

Mitch_Connor 11

Monday 19 September 2011 1:47

"I heard you're good at kickball."

borkchop1992 15

Monday 19 September 2011 2:13

king of the hill

Zillie 4

Monday 19 September 2011 2:15

******* love King of the Hill!

SirBedevere 0

Monday 19 September 2011 1:47

Falcon Punt.

GrammaticalNazi 2

Monday 19 September 2011 1:47

If she didn't realize it wasn't her boyfriend after she touched your crotch, then feel bad for her for only getting guys with atomic penises. You can't blame her for being so angry.

badactor009 0

Monday 19 September 2011 8:29

You can blame some idiot for attacking the wrong person.

Gloritank 8

Monday 19 September 2011 1:48

I was wondering how this could happen. Then I saw it was from Texas :) question answered.

kimaci3 0

Monday 19 September 2011 4:58

^^ lmfao

yummylicious 5

Monday 19 September 2011 1:52

I hate how aggressive people are, especially when it ends up being towards the wrong person.

boredblonde 17

Monday 19 September 2011 1:53

youre probably a cute boy :)

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

Keywords

Students Relatable Work Mental health Kids Parenting Awkward Love Embarrassing Intimacy Wanker Family AITA First Dates Singing Cats Animals Weddings Public freakouts Bodyshaming Transportation Cops Cars Sex Sexism Growing old Health Periods Job interview Education

The Top

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 090

You deserved it 18 232

Today, my best friend asked if I'd join him and his girlfriend for a 3-way. Since I've always had a crush on his girlfriend, I eagerly agreed. When I got there, I learned that their idea of a 3-way was them watching me jerk off while I watched them have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 572

You deserved it 2 671

The Top

Today, my husband told me he no longer loves me and is moving out. It's also our 13th wedding anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 119

You deserved it 240

Today, my obese mother-in-law took her top off at our pool party, exposing her sagging breasts. When I told her to cover herself, she lifted her breasts, turned them inwards, and squeezed them together while staring me in the eyes. She kept doing this on and off for the next two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 043

You deserved it 5 246

Today, I mistook a little girl for a boy. Unfortunately, I only realised my mistake until after I'd cut her hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 731

You deserved it 1 864

So many FMLs happen on birthdays. They should probably be avoided altogether.

I agree, your life sucks 577

You deserved it 129

Today, I went to my husband's work to give him lunch. His assistant told me his "wife" was in his office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 927

You deserved it 3 039

Today, my husband brought me breakfast in bed. Don't get me wrong, I'm very thankful and love him even more for the thought. But the only problem with breakfast in bed is that you have to eat what they bring you, even if it's bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 912

You deserved it 1 959