Love: Today, I was getting coffee with my aunt, and she asked me to...

By brannonjames - 10/05/2012 22:20 - United States

Today, I was getting coffee with my aunt, and she asked me to pay. She then turned to the Barista and said, "He's never had a girlfriend before, and I wanted to show him that they take your money." The Barista laughed so hard she had to excuse herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 421

You deserved it 2 346

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

By joanikens - 26/03/2016 19:02 - United States - Buena Park

Today, I'm a barista at Starbucks. When my crush walked in and asked how much his coffee would cost, I said a date. He said he'd rather pay for the coffee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 091

You deserved it 6 117

By theuglyfriend - 17/07/2012 06:09 - United States - Riverbank

Today, I went to a coffee shop with my friend. The guy rang her up and said it was only a dollar as he winked at her $10 purchase. Then he rang me up at completely full price. She got his number and I got to be the ugly friend once again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 717

You deserved it 3 718

The date from hell #5676

By DennisQuaide69 - 27/06/2017 00:00

Today, I went on an a date with a guy I met online. We were waiting in line at Starbucks when he turned to me and said, "Do you want anything?" Just before I was about to answer, he practically shoved in front of me and paid for himself. The cashier looked more horrified than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 358

You deserved it 501

Cheap

By SmokeWeedErdayAllDay - 18/04/2020 17:00

Today, I was in the mood for some coffee, which is right down the street. I brought ten dollars with me, not knowing how much I'd need. When I approached the counter, the barista looked at my hand holding the ten-dollar bill and said, "Oh, our cheap things are on the left side of the menu." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 588

You deserved it 260

Charming

By jay ze punk - 29/01/2013 19:56 - France - Metz-tessy

Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 818

You deserved it 5 231

Joe Smooth

By Anonymous - 09/12/2023 18:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I thought I was being smooth by using a pickup line on a cute barista. I confidently said, "Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears." She replied, "Actually, I'm a barista, and everyone else is waiting for their coffee. Next!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 118

You deserved it 1 103

Stop perving

By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 04:30 - Ireland

Today, I had to repeat my order in Starbucks three times because the barista was staring at my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 561

You deserved it 12 425

By darn it. - 20/02/2009 16:16 - United States

Today, I was at a bar with a friend. A guy came up to me, took my drink and drank it. I laughed and jokingly said "now, you have to buy me a drink." He said "I would rather buy your friend a drink." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 042

You deserved it 4 156

Scammers gonna scam

By sarahwittman - 13/06/2011 22:29 - United States

Today, my aunt and I went shopping. When we got to the store, she said she forgot her wallet, and I told her I would buy some things for her. When we were at the checkout, I was a dollar short. She said, "Oh, I'll get it!" and pulled out her wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 329

You deserved it 4 902

By oopsiecoffee - 09/04/2009 06:40 - Canada

Today, I went into a small coffee shop. In line, a guy came up to me and was like "I haven't seen you here before, are you new in town?" and I replied with "Oh, no I've lived here for years. The coffee here is crap, though, so I only come here when Starbucks is full" He's the owner of the shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 318

You deserved it 76 705

countrygirl3250 16

Friday 11 May 2012 8:52

and that's when you should have said; "and this is why you're on your third husband" regardless if she really is or not!

MetalxSoldier 26

Friday 11 May 2012 8:45

And they embarrass you. Hmm... I think as long as you don't date your aunt out anyone like her you should be fine.

Comments

RawEndo 1

Friday 11 May 2012 8:56

Better get a girlfriend to spend your money on rather than on your aunt.

mikeofthunder 13

Friday 11 May 2012 9:00

If she's that good at embarrassing you, get her on your side and she'd probably get you a gal as quick as a sneeze!

Riley97 0

Friday 11 May 2012 9:11

Get on her good side you mean?

simonsaysYDI 8

Friday 11 May 2012 15:18

Both ways make sense =P

OkitaCockroach 19

Friday 11 May 2012 9:06

Oh wow. The joke wasn't even funny. Was the barista high or something?

kei1108 13

Friday 11 May 2012 9:07

I don't see why that would be so hilarious. Don't listen to them, OP. You're awesome!

icallbullshit 3

Friday 11 May 2012 9:25

You see guys it's funny because it's true, girlfriends do take your money. If you're a doormat that is.

br0ccoli 14

Friday 11 May 2012 9:27

Awww. Nothing like tough love to make you hate your family members. Who needs enemies with family like that?

zacsFML1212 0

Friday 11 May 2012 9:32

It's okay my aunts a bitch as well

teague95 16

Friday 11 May 2012 12:23

Maybe it's because you take weird angle photos

simonsaysYDI 8

Friday 11 May 2012 15:23

Maybe it's because she doesn't want a Justin Bieber wannabe for a nephew?

habibiiiiiii 2

Friday 11 May 2012 20:26

Haters !!

KiddNYC1O 20

Friday 11 May 2012 23:52

Gonna hate.

linkinpark98 23

Friday 11 May 2012 9:43

There's someone for everyone, OP! I'm sure you'll find her. :)

felisaa 5

Friday 11 May 2012 10:54

What a random thing for your aunt to say. Just find someone better to spend your money on(:

ancollins 6

Friday 11 May 2012 10:57

Next time you're with her, just start walking away and say to the first guy you see "she's never had sex before, and I was just showing her how that's all some guys want"