Kids: Today, I was baby sitting ten year old twins. When they first...

By annoyedwithkids - 02/07/2011 05:48 - Canada

Today, I was baby sitting ten year old twins. When they first saw me, they ran away screaming and hid in the closet. This isn't the first house where this has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 626

You deserved it 5 391

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By peestain - 25/10/2010 10:06 - United Kingdom

Today, I babysat my neighbour's spoilt bratty twins. When I told them it was their bed time, they pushed me over. One then started smashing me with a plastic sword, and as I lay helpless on the floor the other one peed on me. I got owned by two five year olds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 664

You deserved it 32 119

The Shining

By Anonymous - 30/03/2020 14:00

Today, I was babysitting my 4 year-old twin brothers yet again. I began to get desperate when they took my phone and would start crying every time I tried to take it back. My mother found me thirty minutes later, huddled in a corner, crying. I'm 27 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 993

You deserved it 1 329

By Anonymous - 15/09/2014 15:51 - United States - West Newton

Today, I babysat a 10 year old from hell. She kept insulting me, saying I have tiny boobs, that boys must hate me, and that I'm ugly. I eventually got fed up and put her to bed. When her parents came back, she ran out of her room in tears and told them I'd beaten her. They believed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 147

You deserved it 2 937

By I hate children - 18/08/2014 12:10 - United Kingdom - Liverpool

Today, two children decided it would be fun to try to ding-dong-ditch me. I never answered the door as I saw them running away. They did it a couple of times before getting bored. That's when they decided it would be fun to come into my house instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 182

You deserved it 5 164

By ellen77 - 13/09/2013 05:55 - United States - Santa Barbara

Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one of them duct taped a knife to a toy machine gun, lit the barbecue on fire, and ran around like a wild banshee screaming obscenities. The other one got scared and climbed onto the roof of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 027

You deserved it 5 431

By Anonymous - 01/04/2013 16:02 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I was babysitting, and after the kids fell asleep I started hiding the Easter candy. They woke up when I was half-done, and it didn't take them long to figure out what was going on. They won't stop crying, and every time I go near them, they scream "LIAR!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 869

You deserved it 8 025

Make it stop

By Levi2411 - 31/12/2018 04:00

Today, I'm babysitting. The kids have only been home at the same time together for 15 minutes. Two of them have punched each other and the other is running in circles screaming. What is wrong with this picture? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 295

You deserved it 329

The Omen

By Anonymous - 30/05/2012 01:55 - United States - Sioux City

Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 933

You deserved it 2 004

By UnpaidBabysitter - 07/08/2019 04:00 - United States - New York

Today, I was shut in a boiling hot room with six children: a 10-year-old who kept shouting, a belligerent 7-year-old, two 5-year-olds who thought hitting me was funny and two 2-year-olds, who wouldn't stop crying. Their parents were just outside, laughing away, ignoring me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 671

You deserved it 198

By Scaryman - 21/02/2010 00:03 - United States

Today, I was sitting down in a store when a stroller stopped by me. While the parents were fixing the strap, the baby looked at me, gasped, looked at me again, gasped, and then screamed. Ten minutes later, another baby looked at me and screamed. My face scares babies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 277

You deserved it 4 161

swansung 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 16:06

So, you have a face for telemarketing... or cattle wrangling. Could be worse. Could be your kids.

lovin_darkness 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 16:08

Ok Micheal Meyers, little tip: Try taking off the slasher clothes, putting down the knife and being friendly; maybe say hello

Comments

dewby98 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 21:18

you scare me too

KickItHigh 32

Saturday 2 July 2011 21:44

Time for a new face... or a lifestyle change. Also, i thought babysitting is one word... :S

princessjes23 6

Saturday 2 July 2011 21:50

Eh sometimes kids are jus like that.

mag4dust 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 22:29

sounds like your not good with kids at all....

KyraAlcor 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 22:45

bwaha that's sux

Chrispayne 4

Saturday 2 July 2011 23:08

Maybe u need to think about getting a new job like n the carnival

Chrispayne 4

Saturday 2 July 2011 23:08

Maybe u need to think about getting a new job like n the carnival

AnynomousPerson 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 23:57

Your pretty on the inside? Haha.

EmyB_fml 8

Sunday 3 July 2011 1:04

pic or it didn't happen JK

lisha88 1

Sunday 3 July 2011 1:09

maybe u should get plastic surgery if u look that bad

Keywords

Health Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Family Kids Fight Love Relatable Students Work Animals Birds Sleep Noise Mental health Contraception Medication Racism Cheating Pregnancy Relationship advice Friends Teenagers Embarrassing Intimacy Sex Food Revenge Cats

The Top

Today, I found out that if you put tea bags into a cup of hot water, the tea bags will melt. The result: You get to drink and chew tea leaves at the same time, with little bits of actual tea to help make them go down. 0/10, do not recommend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72

You deserved it 331

Today, according to my husband of many years, he was actually planning to ghost me after our boring first date. It was only the fact that I shagged him senseless that night that kept him around long enough for us to actually get to know each other. Hooray for me being a "loose slut" back in 1998. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 139

You deserved it 561

The Top

Today, I accidentally texted the girl I like, "Oh god, I just choked on a boner." I meant bone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 838

You deserved it 5 011

Today, my date threw a fit, burst into tears, and made a huge scene in the middle of a crowded restaurant, all because I offered to pay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 943

You deserved it 3 125

Today, I was helping my dad sell furniture online after a messy divorce. After organising everything to be picked up, it turned out the buyer was the guy Mum had the affair with. What are the chances? FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 965

You deserved it 702

Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 082

You deserved it 6 380

Today, I now accept how stupid I was to marry a man whose plans for the future all start with, "When I win the lottery…" FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 558

You deserved it 9 672

Today, after telling my best friend an idiot could make Kraft Dinner, I spilled boiling water all over my hands and forearms while attempting to strain the noodles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 212

You deserved it 36 242

Same thing different taste

The Shining

Make it stop

The Omen

Top comments

Comments