Health: Today, I was at a public pool. A very fat kid yelled, "Cannon...

By Collin - 10/06/2010 19:59 - United States

Today, I was at a public pool. A very fat kid yelled, "Cannon Ball!" He jumped right on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 825

You deserved it 4 508

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By adeeri - 04/09/2014 01:24 - United States - Jackson

Today, a little kid accidentally ran into me at the pool. He apologized by biting my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 291

You deserved it 3 220

By JuggaloSlasher15 - 08/08/2013 23:03 - United States

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 743

You deserved it 6 800

By butisavedyourkid - 06/06/2013 04:13 - United States

Today, I rescued a little boy who looked like he was drowning in a public pool. His mother then smacked me in the face for "touching him". FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 258

You deserved it 3 539

By qtpieo1 - 13/08/2010 16:14 - United States

Today, I was at the pool with two boys I babysit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 501

You deserved it 9 732

By Anonymous - 12/07/2013 20:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 625

You deserved it 6 645

By poolfail - 06/08/2014 21:14

Today, at the pool, I decided to face my fears and go off the high dive. I slipped off the edge and did a barrel roll into the pool while screaming like a little girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 092

You deserved it 6 543

By klutz - 10/08/2009 14:34 - United States

Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 851

You deserved it 56 826

By babydoll13211 - 04/09/2009 21:36 - United States

Today, I was at a friend's pool party. He lives on a lake and one of our friends wouldn't get in the water. My best friend and I decided to push him off the dock. Once we had, I turned to see my crush who had watched looked shocked, then said, "You know he can't swim right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 318

You deserved it 66 291

Bounce off

By clumsy girl - 25/09/2023 12:30 - United States - Austin

Today, I embraced my inner child and went to a trampoline park with friends. I was having a blast until I attempted a somersault and ended up bouncing right into a group of screaming toddlers. I was escorted out by a concerned parent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 269

You deserved it 729

By Anonymous - 11/06/2011 00:14 - United States

Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 435

You deserved it 7 721

itz_towelie 6

Friday 11 June 2010 1:18

you got to be carefull when fat people are dealing with their arch nemesis gravity.

ImaginaryFoe 0

Friday 11 June 2010 1:17

Erm, YDI for looking like water? Lawsuit! Trolling doesn't suit me. OP, when you hear someone at a pool shout "Cannonball" GTFO! Bad things are about to happen. FYL

Comments

tyler3 0

Friday 11 June 2010 9:06

I would beat that fatty up

benderbang48 4

Friday 11 June 2010 9:54

did u sue the ******* fat ass

1d1r1a1g1o1n 0

Friday 11 June 2010 12:24

Sue his ass

RyGuy748 0

Friday 11 June 2010 12:50

that fattie... the fat kids ruin everything... tell him to go get a lean cuisine or something. that boy should be at weight watchers!

todo350 0

Friday 11 June 2010 17:23

look at you??? hahahaha, may he without sin cast the first stone, dhoucher.

CovertMilitance 0

Friday 11 June 2010 13:43

Break his neck

EvilDave 13

Friday 11 June 2010 14:55

I see a law suit against his parents, and by extension him.

szlafarski 0

Friday 11 June 2010 14:59

ydi for being in nj

blackllama 0

Friday 11 June 2010 15:45

I lnow someone who jumped off a pier and broke there arm on some guys head. the guy hit was fine.

fuckmahlife 0

Friday 11 June 2010 17:30

Lmfao, favorited.

givemechange 0

Friday 11 June 2010 18:07

ive broken my collarbone 3 times, and every time it was because a heavy person fell on me in one way or another. its the worst.

Keywords

Weird Miscellaneous My ex Awkward Shopping Racism Family Relatable Kids AITA Love Cheating Work Break-ups Animals Cats Cute Intimacy Sex Relationship advice Alcohol Coworkers Mental health Health Psychology Cops Neighbours Scary Stressed out Parents

The Top

Today, I awoke to my husband donning a gorilla mask in the middle of the night. My kids have been staying in a tent out back for the past few nights, and have complained of a "monster" scaring them. I told them that it was their imagination. My husband says he gets a kick out of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 622

You deserved it 6 969

Today, I had to catch a bus to work, as my car had to be taken in yesterday. The bad drivers always upset my stomach with their instant stop/start driving style. I felt a burp coming on, but it turned out to be projectile vomit that filled my mask right up and poured down my shirt and pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 214

You deserved it 185

The Top

Today, I was demoted as a bridesmaid in a wedding because I dyed my hair, and didn't ask permission from the bride to do so. The bride is my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 131

You deserved it 5 527

Today, I found out why the temps were not invited to the company Christmas party. The company paid for the regular employees to go to a nice restaurant, gave them nice presents, and handed out substantial bonuses. They keep telling me they can't hire me on because the company can't afford it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 334

You deserved it 802

Today, I got an email that my Amazon account was probably hacked, and they have gone ahead and canceled all orders that seemed suspicious. Two days ago I was celebrating that I'd finished Christmas shopping early. Never mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 767

You deserved it 159

Today, I walked into my room in only a towel. I walked in front of my brother to get to my computer. He said, "My webcam is on." I replied smartly by screaming, hugging the towel tightly to me, turning, and running straight into the glass door, dropping the towel. His friends saw and laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 689

You deserved it 15 560

Today, a reliable source informed me that my suspicions that I would soon be fired were wrong. Instead, my boss plans to make my life miserable until I quit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 528

You deserved it 236

Today, my boyfriend sent me an article about how smelling farts can reduce dementia then added, "You're welcome." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 923

You deserved it 904

Same thing different taste

Bounce off

Top comments

Comments