Intimacy: Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having...

By moonstone15 - 06/08/2011 00:24 - United States

Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 212

You deserved it 4 245

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Same thing different taste

By mel - 18/01/2013 23:18 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I went to a family dinner. My grandma wasted no time calling me a slut for not wearing a dress, my dad called my police officer boyfriend a "fucking pig", and then he told my mother to "put a cock in it" when she defended me. No wonder I hardly ever visit these people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 017

You deserved it 3 132

Welcoming

By Anonymous - 06/06/2014 15:45 - Australia

Today, I was having lunch with my fiancé's family. After he excused himself to use the bathroom, his grandmother glared at me, sneered, "I never liked you" and kept eating while the others smirked. When my fiancé returned, everyone pretended nothing had happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 003

You deserved it 8 353

By Anonymous - 14/08/2011 20:21 - United Kingdom

Today, my religious parents were hosting a family dinner. Not only did we have to wait over an hour for my grandma to finally show up, but when she did, she had her 30 year old boytoy in tow. Apparently, "Granny has needs too you know, hahaha!" Goodbye peaceful family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 316

You deserved it 3 266

Let her have her fun

By WHY GRANDMA - 17/06/2023 20:00 - United States

Today, I was at a restaurant with my grandma. A young, ripped gentleman suddenly walked through the door and my grandma looked at him and shouted, "Look! Eye candy!" as loud as she could. He heard it and was extremely embarrassed. To make it worse, my grandma is a widow, so she might have actually meant it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 690

You deserved it 155

By FML - 04/09/2015 16:27 - United States - Maricopa

Today, I took my boyfriend to a family dinner. It went well, until my dad got drunk and started telling everyone about how "midgets" are assholes and are ruining America. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 693

You deserved it 1 725

By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 07:09 - United States - Owensboro

Today, I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her for the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 790

You deserved it 5 577

By embarrassment - 12/06/2009 13:46 - Canada

Today, I went to a family dinner. While waiting to be seated, a guy walked by and I looked to see if he was hot. Then my grandma yelled, "Get your eyeballs back in your head and quit staring at boys!" The whole restaurant heard her. Including the guy. And yes, he was hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 392

You deserved it 8 381

By heymacie - 19/02/2015 05:45 - United States - Lubbock

Today, I was at a family gathering with my boyfriend. Jokingly, my grandmother swatted my butt to get me to move. Out of habit, I moaned quite loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 975

You deserved it 38 255

By Brie - 05/09/2011 13:00 - United States

Today, my grandmother pulled down her pants and screamed, "Kiss my ass" in the middle of a packed restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 197

You deserved it 3 202

By Oh God - 24/05/2018 06:00

Today, I met my new boyfriend’s family for the first time. Unfortunately for me, his dad walked in to ask what we wanted for dinner while we were having sex. Even worse was that my boyfriend kept going while his dad was there, and his dad later said he was glad I was “the woman”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 109

You deserved it 1 447

lajaynay 15

Saturday 6 August 2011 4:57

I wish my grandmother talked like that. Then I wouldn't have Bible verses thrown at me whenever I walk in the door.

Rickilynn1 10

Saturday 6 August 2011 4:54

Your grandma seems cool.

Comments

bubo_fml 10

Saturday 6 August 2011 10:34

Reminds me of my Grandma! She would swear at the drop of a hat! But, if she or my Grandad ever pissed me off, I'd hide their dentures from them & wouldn't give them back until they whistled the National Anthem! They used to Chase me round the house & hit mw with their cane...

Shafreeka 8

Saturday 6 August 2011 11:38

My Grandma used to call me Satan spawn, beat me with her canes, too.

ukrage 1

Saturday 6 August 2011 10:44

best.granny.ever.

lunargh 7

Saturday 6 August 2011 11:24

That's amazing! When my boyfriend met my family it kicked off an hour-long religious debate (they're all superChristians and he's atheist). THAT'S bad behaviour from your family. I'll trade if you like!

womblebat 2

Saturday 6 August 2011 11:41

I love her, lmao! I'm sure your boyfriend thought she was funny, unless he's a stuck up ****.

davek 36

Saturday 6 August 2011 11:42

FYL, but your grandma is a legend!

venomlash 9

Saturday 6 August 2011 12:52

As a guy, I can tell you that your boyfriend probably just thought it was kind of funny. Well, embarrassing too, but I'd predict that the funny outweighs the mortified.