By anonymous - 06/06/2013 04:14 - United States - Tehachapi

Today, I saw a man on my bike that was stolen a few years ago. I asked him if I could have my bike back just wondering what he'd say. He calmly replied, "Hell no, I stole this fair and square." FML
I agree, your life sucks 61 824
You deserved it 6 527
Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

kozzard 17

If you can prove it was your bike, the police can get it returned to you.

262 4
Ambient25 24

That should have been the part where you either popped the tires or threw him off the bike and pedaled like crazy

146 4

Comments

Ginja_HaZ 15

That's when you scream like a banshee, push him off the bike and petal away.

1 0
mixinitup 12

He seemed pretty proud of the way he stole your bike, OP, to say it was actually "stolen fairly". You should ask him exactly what he did different to steal your bike that made it "fair".

2 0
vencku 13

Probably means he got it himself. Nowadays many people just have someone else steal items for them. This guy at least put in the effort himself. Yeah, I don't know. How else can you steal it fair and square?

0 0
SynysterNero 20

Knock him off of it and steal it back.

2 0
simoncat 11

I'm hoping you figured out a way to find this asshat again- so you direct the police directly to the ugly thief.

1 0
iamthunder 4

Please kindly hand over your man card, you do not deserve to hold it!

1 1
someguy314159265 15

Well, you wondered what he would say, so you asked him, and now you know. Is that not good enough?

0 1
arsenicalhumor 30

I'd push him off of the bike and calmly say, "well, I took it back fair and square" and then bike off into the horizon, laughing like a child's first day at the zoo.

2 0
still_guns 16

What I really meant was, this guy's reasoning is complete twaddle. That is was like saying something really bad is justifiable. I did not mean to post something that looked like it was supported the Holocaust. That was not the intention. It was a simple mis-handling on my part.

0 0