Love: Today, I found out that some men think it's OK to clip their...

By Anonymous - 23/11/2009 10:13 - United States

Today, I found out that some men think it's OK to clip their fingernails at the table, in a restaurant, on a first date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 839

You deserved it 2 993

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/01/2018 01:30

Today, I went on a first date with a guy. As soon as we sat down at the restaurant, he immediately snatched my menu and said "You're having salad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 065

You deserved it 523

Spice

By Anonymous - 07/04/2021 04:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 956

By fububc - 05/02/2010 15:14 - France

Today, I went out for a smoke before dinner. I glanced through the window only to see my husband take my cooking scissors, cut his toe nails and then put them back in the utensils canister without washing them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 825

You deserved it 6 417

By inosehowthatgotthere - 10/02/2011 01:12 - United States

Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 352

You deserved it 52 567

By wtf - 30/01/2015 09:00 - United States - Dearborn

Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 587

You deserved it 2 640

Forbidden

By grounded - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to dinner to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I received a text message, so I pulled out my phone to check. Apparently, his parents have a "No phones at the table rule" and took my phone away until I could learn "proper table manners." FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 567

You deserved it 48 053

No third base for you

By Anonymous - 26/03/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom - Wakefield

Today, I went to a restaurant for a second date. As we were eating, a piece of food got stuck in my teeth. I tried to discreetly remove it, but ended up spitting it across the table and onto my date's glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 714

You deserved it 251

First and last date

By hairless by death - 13/08/2013 16:07 - United States - Santa Rosa

Today, I went on a date with a guy I really liked. The date was going great until he decided to try flossing his teeth with my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 272

You deserved it 4 241

Gross idea

By Anonymous - 09/03/2012 00:30 - Canada

Today, my husband and I got into a fight because I refused to let him use my fingernail to clean the plaque off his teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 820

You deserved it 2 951

By Anonyme - 06/04/2019 02:00

Today, I went on a date for the first time in ages, only to realize that the guy I was seeing chose to take us to a specific restaurant in able to stalk his ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 309

You deserved it 152

allmidnighteyes 10

Monday 23 November 2009 20:09

At least he wasn't using a Pedegg on his feet and dumping the shavings into the food.

VirtuallyUnbreak 0

Monday 23 November 2009 20:12

Wow men go to such lengths to show disinterest.

Comments

sobe23 0

Thursday 26 November 2009 7:12

Gross!! One time life guarding I found someone's nasty toe nail clippings on the table I used. So gross!!

quascadL 0

Thursday 26 November 2009 21:26

Ewww, i would dump him

COBRAMORPH 0

Thursday 26 November 2009 22:58

Most women think its ok to have a guy pay for everything on a date, & think a kiss is enough.

ugh_a_lug 7

Thursday 3 December 2009 2:18

WIN

denyit 0

Friday 4 December 2009 17:48

What? It's not OK??!! :O :)

DarthRant 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 20:34

Are you kidding? You should've just walked out. And how does this guy get any dates?

egging 0

Thursday 1 July 2010 5:34

YDI for not know your proper punctuation.

mstarter 0

Sunday 22 August 2010 11:09

Average American Man FTW

Khfan12 13

Thursday 14 July 2011 23:06

Today, I found out, some girls think, it's ok to use commas, anywhere they want, whether they go, there or, not. FM, L,.

colonel2013 2

Saturday 28 April 2012 14:25

Why not eat it! Extra protein and win?

liaRawr 9

Sunday 8 December 2013 3:25

Just gagged

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The Top

Today, as I was trying to impress my girlfriend of three months, I showed her the real diamond ring I'd got for my ex. She got an attitude for our whole three-hour car ride home because I'd brought up my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61

You deserved it 1 325

Today, as I was pulling out of the school parking lot I was blasting my music and feeling pretty awesome, I got a few honks and felt even cooler. Until some lady pulled up next to me and told me I had left my binder on the roof and all my papers were all over the road behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 190

You deserved it 44 164

The Top

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook. I didn't know her, but she was cute, so I accepted the request. After looking at her pictures, I sent her a message saying "What's up cutie, do I know you?". She responded "Yes, I'm your cousin". FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 202

You deserved it 57 441

Today, my therapist told me to write down my secrets in an envelope and symbolically burn them. My secrets included stories of my rampant sex life, drug use, a suicide attempt, and the overpowering hatred I have for my family. I've managed to misplace the envelope somewhere back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 501

You deserved it 22 387

Today, while watching Harry Potter, I realized I don't have any positive memories to be able to do a Patronus Charm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 259

Today, I learned that when you flush the toilet, the contents do not disappear into oblivion. They show up in your basement when your sewer backs up. And they come in greater numbers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 634

You deserved it 4 208

Today, I was volunteering at an Indian hospital through a Canadian volunteer agency after paying $3000. It was my first day, but I got deported for having an incorrect visa. I had a tourist visa when I was supposed to have a "miscellaneous" visa. I got deported for volunteering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 943

You deserved it 517

Today, I was out to dinner with a friend. When the bill came with a customer satisfaction survey, I put honestly that the "server friendliness" was "below average." Ten minutes later, I had to return to the restaurant to beg the waitress for my keys, which I had left on the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 932

You deserved it 22 609