Miscellaneous: Today, I bought a garden gnome to spice up my lawn. Tonight,...

By dickhead - 10/04/2015 22:17 - United States

Today, I bought a garden gnome to spice up my lawn. Tonight, someone threw it right through my living room window. Not only will the repairs cost a ton, my neighbor keeps saying stupid shit to me, like "You must be shattered" and "Looks like you ain't got a window gnome... more." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 166

You deserved it 3 393

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Same thing different taste

By ilivealoneandwhatthefuck - 23/06/2013 17:02 - Guam - Yigo

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 284

You deserved it 4 332

By Anonymous - 24/06/2011 21:22 - United States

Today, my daughter was charged with multiple counts of vandalism and trespassing. It seems she's been sneaking out in the middle of the night, stealing and breaking our neighbors' lawn ornaments. Specifically garden gnomes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 220

You deserved it 7 086

"Why are you booing me? I'm right"

By Anonymous - 29/06/2021 18:00

Today, I broke my toe on a decorative statue I bought for our front yard. My husband warned me it took up too much space and was a hazard, and now I get to hear him say, "I told you so." FML

I agree, your life sucks 365

You deserved it 990

By Drafty - 07/11/2012 21:30 - United States - Sylmar

Today, a stray dog came up to my living room window. My pitbull went into attack mode and tried to jump through said window, while it was closed. Now I have to pay to replace the window, and pay to get stitches for my idiot dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 426

You deserved it 7 611

Lee Trevi-not

By Anonymous - 10/10/2019 12:07

Today, I was practicing my golf swing on my front lawn. I took a swing and on the backstroke the golf club slipped out of my hands. Next thing I know, it hits a neighbor's window, shatters it, and goes right into their living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 629

You deserved it 1 511

By notsosmart - 06/03/2011 11:28 - Australia

Today, my son broke a window at school playing football. Not only did he break one, he broke the other window next to it. His excuse? He tried making it look like a bird flew in one way and flew out the other. I have to pay $800 to fix it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 328

You deserved it 4 534

Welcome to the neighborhood

By Anonymous - 16/10/2015 17:12 - United States - Eagle River

Today, four days after moving into my new house, I woke up to a guy yelling, "Fuck you, Claire" followed by a brick smashing through my living room window. Now I know why Claire was so eager to finalize the sale. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 331

You deserved it 1 572

By Anonymous - 12/01/2011 18:47 - Ireland

Today, I was taking my architecture project to school. I'd spent days preparing my little model house. I stepped outside with it in my hand, and right at that moment a gust of wind ripped it away. It's currently lying in my neighbour's garden, smashed to pieces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 565

You deserved it 4 115

By Anonymous - 30/01/2012 23:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I drove home from work, only to find both my next-door neighbours loudly arguing in the middle of my driveway. I got out and asked them what the hell was going on, only to find out one of their inbred kids had put a brick through my back window, and each is claiming the other did it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 097

You deserved it 2 258

Projection

By Anonymous - 22/08/2022 04:00

Today, I was getting ready to go pick up a few things for much-needed projects around the house, when I heard my husband yelling from the basement. The lawnmower had kicked a rock through the expensive sliding glass door we just finished paying off. The rattling refrigerator may have to wait. FML

I agree, your life sucks 912

You deserved it 121

lexiieeex3 32

Saturday 11 April 2015 9:14

I'm sorry, but who buys a garden gnome to "spice up their lawn"

Jason89 15

Saturday 11 April 2015 9:15

i bet that was SMASHING

Comments

Bgreene_5 12

Saturday 11 April 2015 9:53

Through it through their windows and then make shitty puns and see how they like it

momac86 17

Saturday 11 April 2015 10:46

They're probably the one that did it

BtwYoureAdopted 21

Saturday 11 April 2015 10:48

I'm sure there was gnome pun intended

dan34321 6

Saturday 11 April 2015 11:19

that's awful, you'd think he'd of gnome better

abNormal62 23

Saturday 11 April 2015 11:39

A garden gnome was thrown through your window? Were there any witnesses to this? Did anyone register its Travel (vel) ocity?

cheshireau 26

Saturday 11 April 2015 11:53

I wonder if he did it for ***** and Giggles?

PokeyPorcupine 18

Saturday 11 April 2015 12:11

I want to meet your neighbor.

writerchic85 25

Saturday 11 April 2015 12:35

What is it with people stealing and smashing garden gnomes? Honestly i think those fake deer are uglier.

ILikeKoalas 24

Saturday 11 April 2015 12:46

I really don't want to know your idea of spicing up your sex life.

Girlie7 11

Saturday 11 April 2015 12:53

Why don't you put the blame on him?

Keywords

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