Miscellaneous: Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out...

By SenescentSouthernBoy - 17/08/2009 08:42 - United States

Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 479

You deserved it 60 781

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By truth - 10/02/2012 01:49 - United States

Today, my boss reported to the police that a suspicious car has been parked outside the store late at night. I walked outside and my car was gone. He had my car towed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 303

You deserved it 2 186

By Melinie - 24/06/2012 03:23 - United States

Today, I found an empty parking space in a crowded parking lot. When I came back later, a lady and a cop were standing by my car. Her car used to be parked there and got stolen. They think I'm involved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 636

You deserved it 1 902

By me. - 12/11/2012 04:30 - United States - Fort Wayne

Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 117

You deserved it 1 727

By uppiskalle - 12/09/2014 14:32 - United States - Riverside

Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 570

You deserved it 45 709

By Anonymous - 28/05/2016 23:05 - Netherlands

Today, my brother "borrowed" my car and keys without asking me. He came back 4 hours later, alone and pale faced. It took half an hour of questions, interrogation, and finally threats before he admitted that my car is sitting in a ditch a few miles away, probably totaled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 274

You deserved it 886

By fire0fisis - 03/02/2009 21:46 - United States

Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 103

You deserved it 2 315

By dgilbs - 27/08/2012 14:50 - United States - Cheboygan

Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I had forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 022

You deserved it 37 901

By snowbunny - 12/02/2010 02:14 - United States

Today, I bundled up to shovel my car out of almost 2 feet of snow, only to find my car was gone. I ran into the nearby police station to report my stolen car. The policeman trudged down with me to get a report. I had parked my car on the other side of the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 347

You deserved it 31 504

Confess!

By hitandrun - 10/08/2009 18:28 - United States

Today, I hit a parked car and fled because I was so scared. Four hours later, the cops showed up at my house so I broke down crying confessing everything. Turns out, they weren't there about the car I hit. They were alerting me about the string of burglaries in my neighborhood recently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 221

You deserved it 76 086

By TubaAssassin - 28/11/2017 06:00

Today, I came home to find that my roommate had picked my lock and stolen my new laptop. When I tried to take it back, he called the police. They sided with him since he had also taken the receipt, which was "proof" that it was his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 864

You deserved it 291

hihihi002 0

Monday 17 August 2009 16:26

you suck.

jlynn91 0

Monday 17 August 2009 16:33

YDI for using the phrase "find the car stolen". Impossible.

Comments

carb_lover 0

Monday 17 August 2009 17:19

I'm sorry but that is REALLY funny. At least it wasn't stolen! :)

prshusl0l 0

Monday 17 August 2009 17:22

YDI for being a dumbass.

jonny2x4 0

Monday 17 August 2009 17:24

This is no FML. YDI for being a ******* retard!

i_is_a_tr00l 0

Monday 17 August 2009 17:32

YDI for not going to school after the age of 9. TARD.

L0L_Sarah 0

Monday 17 August 2009 17:40

YDI because there is a similar post like this on FML

i_is_a_tr00l 0

Monday 17 August 2009 17:48

My Crotch Smells. :l

ILoveJace01 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 2:44

Because that's not gross at all. Ew.

you_and_me_fml 8

Monday 17 August 2009 18:32

LMFAO! haha ydi

PainfullyUncool 0

Monday 17 August 2009 18:39

How the hell does this happen?

giganticbrain 0

Monday 17 August 2009 18:40

llllaaammmee. Anybody who uses the word "fail" or "epic fail" as a standalone sentence ******* sucks.

purplegiraffes 0

Monday 17 August 2009 19:04

i really would've spent like an hour searching the parking lot before i did something like call the police..

Keywords

Love Embarrassing Awkward Family Weddings Public freakouts Bodyshaming AITA Transportation Cops Cars Kids Sexism Relatable Work Health Mental health Growing old Animals Cats Periods Job interview Education Stalker Instagram Social Media Ironic Phobias Spiders Bikes

The Top

Today, I overheard my soon to be step-daughter telling her friend on the phone that she hopes that mine and her father's wedding is just a big joke, and that he isn't really going to go through with it. I just dropped five grand on a dress and venue. She's in for a surprise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 056

You deserved it 3 116

Today, I took my hoodie off in public and my shirt accidentally lifted up with it. I've had bad skin problems since I was 12 or 13, and my chest looks horrific as a result. Everyone in my vicinity reacted with horror and called me all sorts of awful names. Nice to know that my appearance makes me that repulsive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 571

You deserved it 89

The Top

Today, I challenged my husband to look after our twins by himself all day, like I normally do. When I got home, both babies had on clean nappies and clothes, dinner was cooked, the house was spotless, and 3 loads of washing were done. Smug bastard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 561

You deserved it 7 907

Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend from 5 years back. Still bitter, I said, "Hey baby, you remember riding me 5 years ago?" I was then punched in the face and restrained until the police arrived. She'd been having an 8 year anniversary dinner with her husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 551

You deserved it 52 865

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of 4 years thinks my chemotherapy sessions are the perfect opportunity to sleep with other girls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 420

You deserved it 299

Today, the family dog escaped and I ran after her. She started attacking a random dog, so I started clapping and yelling, trying to get her attention. After I got her away, my hands started swelling. I clapped my hands so hard that they're swollen and bruised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 193

You deserved it 443

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 652

You deserved it 8 159

Today, I was trying to fix a stapler, but it turns out it wasn't broken at all. It wouldn't staple a small stack of papers but had no trouble stapling through my finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 437

You deserved it 3 936

Same thing different taste

Confess!

Top comments

Comments