Work, Sex and Family: To the top - FML

To the top

By Anonymous - 08/07/2022 22:00

Spicy

Today, my brother and I work for the same company, I’ve been here longer, but he got promoted first and has a higher salary. At first I was afraid he was just better than me, so imagine my relief to discover he’s still an idiot, but he’s just been dicking our manager on the regular. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 296

You deserved it 123

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/06/2009 10:11 - United States

Today, I found out that a co-worker of mine that I had originally hired, trained, and mentored to work in my department for the past 4 years had just got the promotion that I had applied for. He is now my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 942

You deserved it 5 428

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 14:03

Today, I got fired from my job. My boss is my brother. His reason being that, "it would create awkward tension between us." I've been working for him for 5 years, and it's like he's only just realised that I was there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 723

You deserved it 114

Dilbert principle

By Anonymous - 16/12/2021 14:59 - Australia - Perth

Today, the only colleague I dislike was promoted to be my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 003

You deserved it 93

By Da Boss - 05/10/2016 01:19 - Canada - Calgary

Today, my coworker and I agreed to come clean and tell our fellow employees that we have been secretly dating for a while. Before we could, I received a promotion. I'm now his boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 913

You deserved it 1 917

By Anonymous - 06/08/2019 22:00

Today, I found out that one of my subordinates, who is whiny, incompetent, undermining, the definition of passive-aggressive and stupid, was given a pay raise. She now makes more than me. My boss values a complete moron over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 672

You deserved it 276

By Anonymous - 10/11/2018 13:30

Today, my sister got fired and I got promoted to her job, got a nice payrise for it. My relationship with my sister will never be the same again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 673

You deserved it 334

By mackmoons - 10/08/2019 14:00 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I found out someone doing the exact same job as me at work is making $900 more than me on their paycheck. The only reason is because when he messes up, he blames it on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 962

You deserved it 152

By Anonymous - 24/05/2019 06:14

Today, I worked a long shift at my job while feeling like crap, anticipating getting a promotion. As my boss was leaving work, he informed me that because I also go to college, the promotion was being given to another employee that I trained a month ago. This is the second time this has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 083

You deserved it 187

By DED - 21/03/2019 12:00 - United States - Eugene

Today, I found out that a co-worker has been promoted to Store Manager. She has been here for less than 6 months, and I have been with the company for 10 years. Guess who has been training her for the last 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 440

You deserved it 269

By Anonymous - 17/03/2018 19:00

Spicy

Today, I got a promotion because my boss “accidentally” had sex with my wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 823

You deserved it 395

Next

Top comments

AzraelAngelus 15

Friday 8 July 2022 22:55

Report them

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Saturday 9 July 2022 6:13

It's not what you do, it's who you screw. Sadly, that still rings true these days.

Comments

AzraelAngelus 15

Friday 8 July 2022 22:55

Report them

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Saturday 9 July 2022 6:13

It's not what you do, it's who you screw. Sadly, that still rings true these days.

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 9 July 2022 18:09

You should have boned your boss when you had the chance.

JasonThorn 19

Saturday 9 July 2022 18:16

Make a call to HR and bone the manager hard, just not in the way they like.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 682

You deserved it 7 123

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been cheating on me. When I told my sister, she just smiled, held up a closed fist, and said "Look at the number of fucks I give!" She then raised a finger, said "Oops. Finger spasm!" then lowered it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 607

You deserved it 5 177

The Top

Today, I overheard my co-workers talking about how they don't need flu shots because everyone else gets them. These people are in the medical industry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 499

You deserved it 3 492

Today, I found out that my wife's dog had peed on my side of the bed, while I was sleeping. I thought I had just drooled in my sleep, until I noticed it had turned yellow during the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 415

You deserved it 177

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a huge fight. Instead of taking me home like he told me he was going to, he pulled up to the gas station, gave me $6, and asked me to go pay. As soon as I walked inside, he threw my bag out the door, and drove off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 501

You deserved it 6 821

Today, I was at the gym running with intensity on the treadmill. As I was working out, I noticed a few guys behind me staring at me. I figured they were checking me out because I was losing some weight and looking better. Turns out they were betting on how much longer "Fat Ass" could last. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 168

You deserved it 6 636

Today, I found out my boyfriend is booking my dream vacation to Bali with his brothers, 6 months after he told me we couldn't go on vacation this year because he doesn’t have the money. They planned this within a week. I had been planning it with him for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 289

You deserved it 196

Today, I was running to catch a bus and when I finally got on, the driver closed the door on me. My arm is now entirely purple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 584

You deserved it 352