Intimacy and Health: TMI Mom!

TMI Mom!

By KtSue - 12/11/2012 05:25 - United States

Today, my mom has officially lost 100 pounds due to a lap-band surgery. After sharing her excitement, she also shared her troubles. She said, "Everything hangs now, even my cooter. Can they fix that?" Thank you for the mental image, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 515

You deserved it 1 905

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Flattery will get you nowhere

By Anonymous - 03/02/2021 14:02

Today, my mother told me I've gained so much weight recently, she thinks I should get gastric bypass surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 753

You deserved it 216

Hard shoulder

By me. - 11/07/2016 03:00 - United States - Norman

Today, I found out my mom has been telling my entire family I need surgery on my "Labia" instead of my "Labrum". I went from needing shoulder surgery to needing vagina surgery with one group text. Thanks, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 747

You deserved it 741

By me - 28/06/2013 15:51 - United States

Today, I went to my parents' house. I recently lost about 30 lbs. My mom hugged me and said, "Aww, you're not my chubby baby girl anymore." She then said she wished I were still fat because she missed it. She's the reason I lost the weight; she used to tease and taunt me. Thanks Mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 566

You deserved it 4 043

Missing the point 101

By Anonymous - 02/10/2019 00:02

Today, I told my mom I lost 30 pounds because of an eating disorder. She told me to keep up the good work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 816

You deserved it 193

TMI Mom

By Why - 30/11/2022 17:00 - United States

Today, I had the pleasure of listening to my mom tell me about how her and my dad's weight loss has helped them get more into it when they're being intimate. Suddenly I wish my parents were fat again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 875

You deserved it 284

By Kristina - 18/02/2009 21:09 - United States

Today, I complimented my mom with "Hey, I think you lost some weight." She replied with "Yeah, I think you found it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 988

You deserved it 6 875

By brittrod - 05/12/2011 01:13 - United States

Today, when my mother-in-law told me I was losing weight, my husband started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 036

You deserved it 3 384

By radiant - 22/01/2009 15:22 - United States

Today, I told my mom I want to get liposuction. She said "Whats the point? Its not like you can get lipo on your face!". FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 981

You deserved it 4 273

By emsbuffalo - 04/01/2012 06:15 - United States

Today, my mom came home from surgery. Upon arriving home, she flashed a paper in my face and said, "Want to see pictures of my colon?" My eyes are still burning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 215

You deserved it 3 107

By fuckingcool - 14/12/2016 20:59 - United States - Ortonville

Today, my friend was complaining to me that she's gained 20 pounds and it's all gone to her butt and boobs. Meanwhile, I've also gained 20 pounds, and it's gone straight to my stomach. She looks better than she did before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 001

You deserved it 723

Pleonasm 35

Monday 12 November 2012 12:05

Don't leave us hanging, OP, what happened? Was it curtains for her cooter, or does the pendulum still swing?

saIty 17

Monday 12 November 2012 12:07

Tell her to pull it back with some rubberbands and clothespins.

Comments

perdix 29

Monday 12 November 2012 20:36

It must be tough to find out one of your parents is a swinger.

AholeCop 11

Monday 12 November 2012 23:48

I'm not sure what she expected from you. "Nice try mom! How do I know your turkey neck wasn't already hanging? Just push it up and staple it like everyone else."

winkydog4056 16

Tuesday 13 November 2012 4:35

Nooooo! This is wrong, just plain wrong! Mothers, lap band or not, should NOT be discussing their cooters/va-jay-jays/hoo-has, with their offspring, unless they want to pay for therapy after they've mentally scarred them for life.