Intimacy: The Three Bears Conundrum - FML

The Three Bears Conundrum

By Madison43097 - 24/09/2009 20:57 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 780

You deserved it 2 541

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Same thing different taste

By Confused lesbian - 16/07/2018 13:30 - United States - Lynchburg

Today, I found a used condom in my bed. I haven't had sex in months and now I'm terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 484

You deserved it 294

By peridot1aa - 24/10/2018 03:00

Today, I was cleaning out my room and picked up my bed and found a condom. I'm 15 and still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 612

You deserved it 221

By anonymous - 08/01/2015 19:10 - United States - Noblesville

Spicy

Today, after getting into bed, I found a used condom under my covers. I asked my roommate about it. She freely admitted that since my bed was comfier than hers, she had sex with her boyfriend on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 106

You deserved it 3 347

By Jake - 02/10/2012 11:52 - United States - Athens

Spicy

Today, I woke up with a used condom on my face. Turns out my roommate had sex with his girlfriend during the night and instead of getting up and throwing it away, he decided to throw it across the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 592

You deserved it 2 802

By the_lonely_life - 27/06/2013 01:02 - United States

Spicy

Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 147

You deserved it 7 045

By Anonymous - 31/07/2012 03:36 - United States - Chicago

Spicy

Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 446

You deserved it 42 532

By ohEw - 09/11/2017 10:00 - United States - Pasadena

Today, while doing my laundry, I found a very clean but presumably used ribbed condom in my freshly washed and dried sheets. It was not mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 990

You deserved it 263

Time to pretend

By fmeplease - 31/05/2009 21:10 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I was cleaning out my bedside table when I came across some condoms I bought on my 18th birthday, to use the first time I had sex. They expired five years ago. I'm still waiting for my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 259

You deserved it 12 743

By Sal - 09/02/2009 18:32 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found a used condom and wrapper in the bathroom trash can at my girlfriends house. The condom is not a brand I've ever used. She lives alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 722

You deserved it 5 262

Gross

By Anonymous - 02/03/2017 17:00 - Canada - Elora

Spicy

Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 532

You deserved it 1 601

Next

Top comments

OhhxGoshhxAri 0

Friday 25 September 2009 1:46

You know, that really makes you wonder who's that was. If it's your parents, then FYL. That would be gross. :x

Nocturnal558 0

Friday 25 September 2009 1:51

It was your neighboor, and a dog!

Comments

Compass 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 21:43

You had sex somehwhere else and put the condom in your room.

ellephaba101 0

Sunday 11 July 2010 21:58

do u share a room? in guessing not. fyl!

SonjaJay 0

Wednesday 29 June 2011 5:17

Looks like someone returned the favor

z93blitz 0

Monday 18 July 2011 3:54

lol now that is funny

HeYHiTmEUp 2

Wednesday 28 December 2011 22:31

Not that you remember!

HaiImJulia 3

Monday 8 October 2012 0:09

I would be paranoid o.O

charcharthunder 18

Monday 2 June 2014 0:04

Eww

blackwidowtaco 31

Friday 31 July 2015 14:30

Perhaps it was your brother?

itssnotfunny 24

Thursday 16 February 2017 20:58

So does everyone in your house just have sex in other people's room?

shannon2348 14

Wednesday 11 December 2019 19:10

people on here seem quite paranoid. It probably got stuck on someones shoe...an animal...or many other reasons it could have ended up there. I doubt if people were sneaking into your room to have sex.

Keywords

Animals Cats Cute Sex Intimacy Awkward Family Work Alcohol Coworkers Mental health Health Psychology AITA Weird Relationship advice Love Cops Miscellaneous Neighbours Scary Stressed out Parents Cake Dogs Birthday Transportation Cars Embarrassing Fire

The Top

Today, I found out that my parents have been lying about my birthday. Now it makes sense how they "lost the birth certificate" or how many photos of me as a baby are dated before I was actually supposed to be born, because "the camera must've glitched, we must've confused the date we wrote in the back of that card." FML

I agree, your life sucks 388

You deserved it 59

Today, I have accidentally encountered my parents having "sexy time" four times in the past week. I'm an adult. My parents are in their fifties. Their bedroom door doesn't fully shut, so I always get an unpleasant glimpse when I walk past, occasionally punctuated by my mom's pleasured moaning. Kill me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 610

The Top

Today, I told my mom I was going to a New Year's party. She told me to be back by midnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 998

You deserved it 3 368

Today, my friend said that his dad told him we couldn't hang out anymore, he thinks I'm a bad influence because I don't have all 90's in my classes. The only reason he knows I have below a 90 is because he's my geography teacher. I have an 87. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 496

You deserved it 1 477

Today, I stayed at my mate's house over the weekend, but his mother threw me out, saying I’m was taking advantage of her hospitality. First, it’s her son's house, so it’s not even her hospitality, but also I was helping redecorate the whole house for free, so how was I taking advantage? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 113

You deserved it 83

Today, I coughed so hard that I tore an intercostal muscle in my ribs. Now I can't cover my cough, as I have to cross my arms against my ribcage to stop the pain. FML, FML, F Me All Day Long (sung to the tune of Jingle Bells). FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 123

Today, I thought it would be funny to fart next to my brother in the car. Apparently, his carsickness is exacerbated by strong smells. I now know what it feels like to have lap full of vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 636

You deserved it 38 960

Today, my high school sweetheart and husband of 20 years sent me a text, saying, "You will notice I'm no longer living at home. I moved in with my parents while you were making dinner tonight. There's no one else. I'm just over the being married & stuff." Twenty years and dumped / divorced via text. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 021

You deserved it 134