Poopoo peepee and Miscellaneous: Morning surprise - FML

Morning surprise

By JayBausch - 17/08/2009 20:48 - United States

Today, I went to retrieve my sneakers that my wife made me leave outside the door of our hotel room. Somebody had shat in one of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 754

You deserved it 7 062

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Same thing different taste

By g_unit - 10/12/2009 05:24 - Canada

Today, at work, I went to fold a pair of pants that was left in a changing room to find out that someone had taken a dump in them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 647

You deserved it 2 614

By day001313 - 07/04/2012 04:32 - United States - Albany

Today, I was house-sitting for some friends of my grandparents while they are out of town. While I was in the shower, the dog decided to take my dirty underwear and run. There is now a pair of lacy, black underwear hidden somewhere this giant house, and they return tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 898

You deserved it 3 347

Thanks for nothing

By Downinthedumps - 14/08/2016 22:44 - United States - Flagstaff

Today, at my hotel, I spent over an hour dumpster diving trying to locate a pair of shorts for a spoiled brat that one of the cleaning staff accidentally threw away. When I finally found and returned them to the family, the father insisted they weren't the right ones. Spent all day smelling of trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 374

You deserved it 1 125

By life_suxxx - 17/12/2009 06:09 - United States

Today, I come home to find that my dog has taken a dump on my bed. I quickly put on my house shoes to avoid possibly stepping on any other of his turds. I felt something squish all over my right foot. He also took a dump in my house shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 550

You deserved it 4 899

Not so anal retentive then…

By Anonymous - 03/02/2017 22:00 - United Kingdom - Hull

Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 343

You deserved it 734

By StinkFoot - 28/10/2018 13:30

Today, I was pet sitting for a friend. As soon as I walked in the door, I stepped in dog poop. I took off my shoes to clean them, then stepped in cat pee in my socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 847

You deserved it 371

People are jerks

By Anonymous - 09/07/2021 03:59

Today, I cleaned the two staircases at the hotel where I work. Five minutes later, someone complained they were dirty. Someone had dropped soda and got mud all over them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 894

You deserved it 66

By embarrassed - 19/12/2014 19:24 - United States

Today, I went to the dry-cleaner's and went to get my bag of laundry from my trunk, but I ended up dropping the bag. My dirty underwear blew around the parking lot. I had to chase it all down as a bunch of people looked on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 542

You deserved it 3 919

White Lotus vibes

By Anonymous - 03/12/2022 10:00

Today, I had to deal with a guest who'd left his shoes outside his door to be polished. I told him our hotel doesn’t offer shoe polishing, so if they’re gone they must have been stolen. He then accused me of stealing them for myself, even though I’m a woman with feet 6 sizes smaller than his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 939

You deserved it 69

By Stinky - 20/11/2011 10:23 - United States

Today, at 2am, I heard a strange sound coming from the hallway. I walked over, only to discover my drunk boyfriend pissing in the closet. On my favorite shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 183

You deserved it 4 892

Next

Top comments

caitoLo 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 1:33

someBODY or someTHING?

knd_34 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 1:48

Nice use of the word "shat". People get that wrong all the time.

Comments

lilpanda 0

Monday 8 February 2010 7:02

Shat. Is that like shit and spat? In that case FYL

anybodyudontnoe 0

Wednesday 19 May 2010 23:54

Thats New York for u, and ur wifes a dumb bitch in ny things easily get stolen whytf did she make u leave them out there! btw fyl srry for the "shat" in ur shoe

TheLastSurvivor 0

Monday 9 August 2010 6:03

ydi for spelling shit wrong

nerdytacos 3

Tuesday 12 April 2011 22:54

that's totally effed up...

nikos402 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 10:21

this is hella funny

forever2life 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 0:00

lol "shat"

OsirisFaction_fml 5

Wednesday 20 July 2011 23:27

Wa Charlie Sheen around at the time?

Brak_Spaceman 19

Monday 30 January 2012 17:10

i pooped in your shoes.

drdingus 27

Thursday 23 February 2012 0:24

*facepalm*

sgtcxelite 11

Saturday 29 December 2012 20:45

Who the **** leaves their belongings outside of the hotel room? Really. Who? I'd only expect someone to steal them though.. Nice work to the jackass who decided to shit in them.

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The Top

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 953

You deserved it 28 266

Today, my cat tried to look out my bedroom window. To do so, she tried to stand on my air conditioner. She was unsuccessful in that endeavor, almost knocking my TV over and fucking up the side panel. Now there's an opening in my window that I can't close up. Guess I'll take the AC out and shut the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 271

You deserved it 86

The Top

Today, I asked a co-worker if he'd cover for me while I slipped out to cash some money at the bank. When I got back, I found out that when he said "yeah, sure" he actually meant "yeah, sure, I'll tell the boss and get your dumb arse suspended". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 984

You deserved it 13 231

Today, I was with my boyfriend, and we started to get a little kinky. He laid me down roughly on the bed, but I started to slide off, so I pulled myself up. In doing so, I managed to knee him in the nut-sack, causing him to puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 703

You deserved it 7 859

Today, my crush won the bet that I made with him yesterday. The bet? That he couldn't land a date by the end of the day. Not only am I down $10, but a possible boyfriend too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 948

You deserved it 4 852

Today, I found out that my girlfriend was cheating on me. Her excuse? I was the one that had initially introduced them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 065

You deserved it 3 799

Today, I forgot my work clothes at home, so my boss gave me a jacket with a name patch that said "Mike". Still wearing my work clothes, I ran into my ex-girlfriend on my way home. We were together for five years, until she dumped me for a guy name Mike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 240

You deserved it 4 364

Today, I found out my trousers have actually been slowing ripping on the side, after I'd been boasting to everyone I have lost weight and that, “My trousers are literally falling off me.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 671

You deserved it 385