Intimacy and Holidays: Dream on

Dream on

By Robert - 01/01/2018 20:00 - United States - Anchorage

Today, I had another lucid dream. Like every time I lucid dream, I immediately started having tons of dream sex. That would've been fine if I hadn't been taking a nap on the living room couch in the middle of the day. The entire family heard my squirming and moaning and saw me nut my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 661

You deserved it 2 677

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Same thing different taste

Poor pillow

By Randy Candy - 12/02/2021 17:01 - United States

Today, I was having a fantastic sex dream. So good, in fact, that I woke myself up breathing heavily and humping my pillow. I was at my friend's house and she saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 287

You deserved it 271

By Anonymous - 17/01/2016 18:41 - United States - Valparaiso

Today, I was having a wet dream and had a pretty vivid imagination. I ended up thrusting so hard that it showed up in reality. I literally humped so hard that I woke myself up. Not only that, but I was sleeping on the living room floor so my roommates saw and now it's their joke of the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 695

You deserved it 3 985

By Anonymous - 07/06/2012 17:41 - United States - Oregon City

Today, I woke up from a sexy dream about my boyfriend. Too bad I'd fallen asleep in my living room with my whole family over, grandma included. They were all staring. I'd been sleep humping and moaning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 172

You deserved it 6 711

By frankrizzo - 01/02/2009 17:29 - Canada

Today, I had a wet dream. When I woke up, I was touching myself. Unfortunately, I also woke up to find that I had fallen asleep on the couch after eating too much at a family reunion. When I looked around the room, over 10 relatives were giving me nasty looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 028

You deserved it 9 024

By AwkwardMoments - 26/01/2017 14:00

Today, while napping on the couch, I had a very vivid dream about a girl I like. I woke up to my mother and father choking back laughter and recording me on their phones. I don't know what's worse: waking up with a boner in front of my parents or finding out I was also talking dirty in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 947

You deserved it 709

No kinkshaming on FML

By Anonymous - 31/07/2013 16:28 - Belgium - Ieper

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 691

You deserved it 9 329

Morning motivation

By thermos - 03/02/2009 23:47 - United States

Today, I had a sexy dream, woke up and started to masturbate quite vigorously. When I finished, I hopped off the top bunk naked to see my brother and his girlfriend laying in the bottom bunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 182

You deserved it 53 391

By damnit - 16/10/2009 17:27 - United States

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 689

You deserved it 4 261

By urgg - 05/09/2010 14:20 - United States

Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 899

You deserved it 5 006

By Anonymous - 21/11/2015 10:03 - United States - Norwalk

Today, I was house-sitting for my friend. He was late to return and I ended up falling asleep on the couch and having a dream where I violently shat myself and suddenly developed a six-pack. When I woke up, I found the dream was half true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 034

You deserved it 2 310

manb91uk 22

Tuesday 2 January 2018 8:20

Just tell me the dream wasn’t about bacon again

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 2 January 2018 6:11

Never sleep on the couch again...if needed drink a nerogasm to stay awake...

Comments

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 2 January 2018 6:11

Never sleep on the couch again...if needed drink a nerogasm to stay awake...

raspution 21

Tuesday 2 January 2018 6:15

Hopefully your family already knew how nutty you were.

manb91uk 22

Tuesday 2 January 2018 8:20

Just tell me the dream wasn’t about bacon again

RpiesSPIES 27

Friday 5 January 2018 4:31

It was probably Brock from Pokemon, again.

Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20

Tuesday 2 January 2018 12:03

... that was random...

exileonmainst 16

Tuesday 2 January 2018 13:39

Again in Anchorage. Is someone on the fml team sleeping with an alaskan?

ThatGuy9679 13

Tuesday 2 January 2018 13:58

Sounds like an opening for another American Pie movie

Glowworm56 26

Tuesday 2 January 2018 14:35

"Damn it, son! Wear a dream condom next time!"

chosha_fml 26

Tuesday 2 January 2018 16:30

They’re kinda dicks for not just waking you up when you started moaning, though.

Lee Elliott 4

Wednesday 24 January 2018 21:23

tbh, **** that, its already embarrassing all around, at least let me cum.

fayrafox 5

Tuesday 2 January 2018 19:50

Lucid dreams are dreams you can control. Are you sure you don't mean a different kind of dream?

CrazyDanceGirl04 5

Monday 8 January 2018 8:33

um, who wouldn't start having sex in their dream of they could?

Lee Elliott 4

Wednesday 24 January 2018 21:24

me, i turn into a shapeshifting demigod, instead. course, i got issues trying to be interested in sex even awake, with ****, so i'm not exactly normal.