By Craberry - 13/01/2015 11:18 - France - B?ziers
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Zonepellucide's favorite FMLs
By étudiant - 13/01/2015 17:01 - France - Belfort
Meilleur prank
By pums - 14/01/2015 17:18 - France - Istres
By cocufiée - 15/01/2015 06:56 - Polynésie française - Papeete
By hahappy - 15/01/2015 13:28
hahappy tells us more.
By ANNAANAS - 17/01/2015 21:34 - France
Pas maintenant !
By hamtaro - 18/01/2015 10:08 - France - Toulouse
By RyuzakiLawliet - 18/01/2015 13:32 - France - Port-la-nouvelle
By doubj - 21/01/2015 02:40 - France - Saint-sixt
By lebpekin - 23/01/2015 15:48 - France - Paris
By gateausurprise - 23/01/2015 23:51 - Belgique - Gembloux
By huvalo - 24/01/2015 09:55 - France - Brillon-en-barrois
By EJRI - 24/01/2015 11:19 - France - Brest
Comment as-tu osé ?
By BulleDoudou - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - France - Brugheas
By Anonyme - 24/01/2015 21:06 - France - Antibes
Surveillance
By loukid - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - France - Lafitte
By Anonyme - 26/01/2015 15:27 - Royaume-Uni - Salford
By Anonyme - 27/01/2015 19:20 - France - Lyon
By babydoll - 27/01/2015 21:14 - France - Saint-genis-pouilly
By ahok - 28/01/2015 02:03 - France - Pusignan
Bonjour à tous ! Waaaah, ma VDM publiée ! Au moins un bon côté à cette histoire :-) Pour vous mettre dans le contexte, on avait une discussion passionnée (pour ne pas dire qu'on s'engueulait) quand il m'a dit qu'il y avait un truc qu'il aimait pas chez moi, mais qu'il osait pas me le dire. Après dix minutes de torture, il m'a dit "Ben, le matin, t'as mauvaise haleine." Et je parle bien de quand on se réveille des cacas plein les yeux et la bouche pâteuse, pas le matin après le lavage de dents (vu dans les commentaires). Qui a mauvaise haleine après s'être lavé les dents ?? J'ai d'abord cru qu'il se foutait un peu de ma gueule, et en fait non, il était très sérieux. J'ai donc également sorti le caca "Mais t'es au courant que je fais caca des fois ? Même que ça sent mauvais !" Vient ensuite le "Et tes exs, elles avaient toutes une haleine de printemps au réveil ?" "Ben honnêtement, j'ai aucun souvenir de mauvaise haleine avec elles...". Donc là j'ai un peu eu envie de le re-torturer. Je lui ensuite fait remarqué que lui-même ne sentait pas la rose... "Ah mais je sais !". Là je savais plus trop quoi dire devant tant de connerie. Surtout que je sais que j'ai (il a, nous avons tous) mauvaise haleine le matin, et que du coup je lui saute pas dessus pour lui lécher la gueule, au contraire. J'ai aussi toujours une bouteille d'eau pour rincer un peu ma bouche avant de m'approcher de lui (désolée les filles, hors de questions que je me lève avant pour me transformer en princesse, j'aime trop mon lit). C'est d'ailleurs déjà arrivé qu'il me force à lui faire un bisous parce que je voulais pas ("Mais rooh, moi aussi j'ai mauvaise haleine, on s'en fiche, je veux mon bisous !!"). Sinon, merci pour les messages de soutien, pour les messages me disant que j'avais surement un souci (j'ai consulté avidement Doctissimo, et je pense avoir un cancer généralisé niveau 400) :-) Mais pour reprendre un commentaire, j'ai en effet l'impression d'être une espèce rare d'être humain défectueux. Sérieusement, qui n'a pas mauvaise haleine au réveil ?? Bon allez, fin du roman ! Bonne journée à tous, bon week-end, lavez-vous bien les dents surtout, ça sauve des relations ! (ou pas...)