•
•
•

Isamermaid

0

0

17

114

5247

10

CA
35
Saturday 23 June 1990

Isamermaid

Yeah.

Isamermaid -

Isamermaid -

Isamermaid

melanie771...

Slyfried

1_mec

a1n0n

MamaChey

OlRed

distortedc...

Ahmed Sakr

PewPewJess...

SwamJones

JSMOKE619

Joshua Dan...

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

KathrinLor...

melanie771...

croquant77

Overdue

boricualuv

Steve95401

spockadeli...

michaelm12...

Rodville

lambda_fml

csjc

BarthConno...

Isamermaid

Isamermaid

Protein source

Anonymous - 13/08/2021 17:01 - United States - Chicago

Today, a gnat hit my forehead, fell into the space between my glasses and my face, and bounced off my eye while trying desperately to escape. When I tried to get my glasses off, it fell into my mask instead, and I accidentally inhaled it. FML

912

157

Ace in the hole

anna - 15/05/2021 07:58

Today, I learned that it is not normal to have absolutely zero desire for sex. I’m well into my 20s and not a virgin. FML

958

183

Problematic language

Anonymous - 27/02/2021 05:01

Today, at my new retail job, I accidentally referred to white tank tops as, "Wife beaters." That's what I thought they were actually called, until my boss had to correct me. FML

829

451

Wait til she hears about the white supremacy behind it!

published_anthropologist - 23/07/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of eight years explained to me that the Egyptian pyramids were built by aliens from Mars. I have a B.S. in Biology and an M.S. in Anthropology, and I'm working on my Ph.D. She thinks I'm an irrational idiot for telling her she's wrong. FML

51 120

10 187

waterproblem - 27/05/2009 23:10 - United States

Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML

19 533

75 106