Désespérement

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  • Sur le pont..., France
  • 42 years-old
  • Saturday 10 December 1983
  • In a relationship

About Désespérement

Surement blonde dans une vie antérieure, je suis un petit Kinder (blonde à l'intérieur^^) et je suis très gourmande (miam miam Haribo......oups....).
Je ris de tout et surtout de rien...
Je détiens toujours en otage un Tupperware et son amie de longue date ; la fourchette.
En âme charitable j'ai adopté un chat-couette sur une VDM (ça tient chaud la nuit !!!!)
VDM a changé ma vie.... trop bizarre cette histoire !!

Désespérement - Followers

Désespérement - Followed

Désespérement's page visits

lovers5201 Prajac RevanNihil... mdnpju Macallan95 jujusnt

Hugged!

SummerTime... gregorio80 etmerdeogs rien202020 RedFairy marinus13 liamaha Kinapong Junkky justealice Grosse_Lar... manouchka1...

Désespérement's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Happy ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

The thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Picture this FML

You left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

I liked to the power of 20

You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.

My name is, my name is, my name is... Slim Shady?

You took your first steps inside the chatroom. Welcome!

FAAAAAACEBOOK

Your FML account is now linked to your Facebook account.

Happy month-versary

You seem to be glued to FML. Shall we set a tent up for you to sleep in?

Tell us what happened next

You've commented on an FML that you sent in

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

What'ch'all looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, but not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You gave a Hug to someone. How cute!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return, you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Colonel Whiskers

Well done, you gave a Hug to our secret mascot!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

He who tries, wins.

See, one of you was right.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.

Night owl

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.

I'm an early bird, but no worm yet

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 a.m.

Respect your elders

Your account was created during the first year of FML's existence.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Work is a 4-letter word

Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.

Judgmental

You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.

Tweet, tweet

You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.

50 favorites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Censored

Not one, not two, but 50 pages of the Intimacy category read. No comment.

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML, that was subsequently published, and statistically this makes you an exceptional person.

50 quality comments

Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.

A new thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

100 kick-ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

It's in the can!

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

YDI Master

You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.

I agree, my mouse works.

200 "I agree" votes is a good start.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Friendless, or not going out tonight?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1 a.m. Happy New Year!

Socialite

You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Multitasking

You found out about the FML Forum, and checked it out.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Going for gold

You looked for gold on FML. What more do you want, money?

Invader

You were outside of France when you submitted this FML

The return of the thumb

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Star of the Forum

With over 3000 messages posted on the forum, you certainly seem to be opiniated.

The list of badges to find

Désespérement's favorite FMLs

Monsieur Gordon tells us more.

Monsieur Gordon 17

Déjà, merci pour les conseils, à toutes et à tous. Merci aussi pour les remarques plus perfides, j'admets volontiers que j'ai parfois besoin d'un coup de pied au cul. :D Et si je suis du genre à prévoir beaucoup de choses, étudier les possibilités, préparer mes répliques ou mes actions, je constate que certains ont des plans encore plus tordus (quoi que...) que les miens ! D'habitude ça fonctionne (globalement), mais c'est en face d'elle que je perds tous mes moyens... Et mes mots, donc. J'ai pas trop confiance en moi à la base, mais là, impossible de la regarder si elle a les yeux sur moi, c'est à dire souvent; je devrais prendre ça comme un compliment, et lui rendre son regard, mais je fais l'inverse. Au final, je lui fais passer le message inverse de celui que je voudrais... ... Mais bon, faut que je surmonte ça. Je sais pas encore comment, mais j'ai pas envie d'aller acheter mes Pim's un jour et qu'elle ne soit plus là. J'essayerai de vous tenir au courant. :D

mastercard tells us more.

mastercard 9

je mentionne juste que je suis étudiant avec de faibles moyens et donc pour moi c'est cher... non je ne vis pas au-dessus de mes moyens, mais j'ai voulu faire plaisir à ma copine (ex), car la générosité cela n'a aucun prix, lorsqu'il s'agit d'une femme qu'on aime. Aucun message d'avant garde ne m'a été donné sinon je les aurais vus... Bref certains peuvent s'acharner sur moi, etc... Pas grave, j'ai juste posté ma vie de merde.

Irewiss tells us more.

Irewiss 10

C'est clair que lyon c'est ma ville, j'y suis né, ça reste pour moi la plus belle ville du monde. Et puis à part les loutres de mer à Miami ... y'a rien de bien intéressant... je suis tout aussi bien ici ! ^^

Athamo tells us more.

Athamo 0

N'empêche que la blague, moi, je la connaissais pas... Faut croire que ma moitié si, surtout qu'elle était morte de rire en balançant ça. Mon érection en a pris un grand coup. Et genre, dites pas "ça se demande pas blabla", c'était dans le feu de l'action, je voulais juste l'entendre dire un truc du style "Oh ouiii" ou "Encooore" plutôt que les sempiternels longs et langoureux soupirs qui, même s'ils sont très agréables, sont relativement répétitifs. J'espérais pas un "Prends-moi comme un phoque lépreux", c'pas le genre de trucs qui me seksitent ! ='D Ça m'apprendra à vouloir pimenter ma vie seskuelle.