tstrass23g

fries This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff Brooklyn, United States

Creative new ways to be a shitgibbon

Today, my boyfriend announced to me he was sleeping with another girl via alphabet soup. FML

121 comments

jazopalchris 25 November 2013, 23:42 Mount Gambier, Australia 🌶️ Spicy

Today, my 7 year old daughter explained to a taxi driver that she was born from my "vagina that doesn't have hair". He winked creepily at me and said, "I bet it doesn't." FML

124 comments

elissak 7 December 2014, 06:58 Dubuque, United States

Today, I performed the Heimlich maneuver on a man. He cussed me out because the piece of food he was choking on was "a perfectly good portion of lobster". FML

63 comments