asnakes

Bugged

Today, I had a stomach virus, so I didn't eat anything. My new roommate asked me if I was anorexic so to prove I wasn't, I ate a sandwich in front of her. Only to go into the bathroom and throw it up later. She heard and now thinks I'm bulimic. FML

Today, I was on a date with this girl. I attempted to put my arm around her, but I elbowed her in the face instead. FML