The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year The all-time greatest FMLs

Hurry up!

By lukey101 - 28/12/2023 15:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I increased my internet plan to help speed up downloading a giant 600GB file. After paying for the upgrade, I got a notification that the plan change wouldn’t be effected until 24 hours later. Of course, it actually upgraded mere moments after the file download had already completed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 274

You deserved it 450

This isn't relevant to my interests

By Alan Alda's Dog - 02/07/2025 09:00 - Canada - Montréal

Today, I wanted to call my mom to ask for advice but called my boss instead. I panicked and ended up talking about weekend plans like nothing was wrong. She now knows way too much about my personal life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 462

Watch your step

By Anonymous - 14/01/2024 06:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I have now reached the point in the financial landslide of my life that the only thing of value I have managed to hold on to is my life insurance policy, which I just manage to pay for every month. It says something that I am now actually worth more dead than alive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 492

You deserved it 100

Are you OK?

By Louis - 05/08/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, a colleague said I looked “different” and I thought it was a compliment. It turns out they meant that I looked “tired and stressed.” I smiled awkwardly and said, “Thanks?” while internally dying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 87

Sabotage

By FuckUp - 24/08/2025 00:00 - Germany

Today, I can't afford to lose my job but I've been consciously sabotaging my job for months now. My manager pulled me aside to let me know that I am untrustworthy and need to improve. I'm smart and have no idea why I'm doing this to myself. I had a great work ethic in my previous job, even winning awards for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 134

You deserved it 508

Nope, no thanks

By Alone - 26/08/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, three members of my five-person polycule moved away, leaving myself and one other girl. I really liked her, so I was okay… until she split because she "didn't want to be in a boring straight relationship." FML

I agree, your life sucks 269

You deserved it 401

Hair care

By Anonymous - 28/08/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, after spending a week detangling my hair (It took a week because my hands have nerve issues) because it felt like my scalp was glued to my scalp from not being taken care of, I cut it all off. My hair got tangled in the device twice and eventually revealed a burn on my scalp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 338

You deserved it 112

Waste of time

By Anonymous - 06/09/2025 22:00 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, my parents have separated. I stayed with them, living at home far too long for my own comfort, just to help them keep it together after they lost their remaining parents. Literally the month after I moved out, they decided it wasn't worth it. I now suspect they stayed together only because I still lived at home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 315

You deserved it 130

Long day, long ride home

By Jennette - 13/09/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, I fell asleep on the train after a long day. I woke up to find that I’d been drooling onto the shoulder of the stranger next to me for at least three stops. He said nothing, but when I stood up, there was a wet patch shaped like my face on his sleeve. FML

I agree, your life sucks 281

You deserved it 109

Good question

By Not today Satan!! - 18/09/2025 03:00

Today, I reheated leftover soup and confidently carried the steaming bowl to my couch to watch TV. I sneezed halfway through sitting down, spilled soup all over my lap and instinctively yelled, “WHY, GOD?!” loud enough that my crazy neighbors banged on the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 297

You deserved it 134

A lot to deal with

By Anonymous - 21/09/2025 00:00

Today, my boyfriend of six years asked, "If you'd go somewhere, where'd you go?" Assumed he's planning our first big vacation, I said, "Somewhere warm, with water and beaches." Later I found out via social media that he's at the airport with a chick resembling our new neighbour. They're going to a romantic place with his boss. I also found out that I'm pregnant and unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 488

You deserved it 142

Gamer bros

By honey poopoo - 25/03/2024 09:00 - Germany - Landshut

Today, I learned that my friend is selling his PlayStation 5. A few weeks ago I bought a PlayStation 5 to be able to play with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 130

What is he hiding?

By Wtf - 04/10/2025 20:00

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he had any secret sexual fantasies and promised that I wouldn't judge him, hoping to scratch my kinky itch. He looked at me wide-eyed, yelled, "IT'S A TRAP!!" and literally sprinted out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 257

Water, water, everywhere

By Anonymous - 18/05/2020 05:00

Today, I learned that taking a shower right before your house starts flooding is the human equivalent to washing your car right before it starts raining. Only much worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 471

You deserved it 161

Punk rumble

By Not Even Chinese - 02/11/2025 22:00

Today, three teenage punks harassed me spewing made up Chinese. They might've scored a bingo, because a group of royally pissed off Chinese men came and attacked them. The cops arrived and took them, and me, not believing that I wasn't with them. Their evidence: one of punk's phones shows one of them consoling me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 72

Be unprepared

By Anonymous - 01/05/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, we were supposed to go on a weekend camping trip with our Scout troop. On Thursday I wasn't feeling well but I made it through school okay. Dad forced me to pack up immediately after school, even though I felt worse. I threw up on the porch on the way out. Dad thinks I did this on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 80

Freud would have field day

By Anonymous - 10/11/2025 20:00

Today, I was about to hook up with my crush, but he turned out to have a micro penis and couldn’t even get it hard. Then I woke up. I can’t even get laid properly in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 337

You deserved it 137

I'm outta here

By Anonymous - 15/11/2025 03:00

Today, I set an out-of-office auto-reply for my work email saying, “Currently out of the office, pretending to care somewhere else.” I forgot to turn it off. My boss emailed me three times before I noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50

You deserved it 545

It's The End Of The World As We Know It (And I Feel Like Shit)

By The lights will flicker on...and off... - 18/12/2022 18:00

Today, the massive snowstorm that has been mercilessly attacking my city for the past week started causing random, brief blackouts every 2-5 minutes. I'm very sick, so the last thing I need is for this house to be cold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 881

You deserved it 148

What the hell is even that?!

By Anonymous - 09/05/2024 06:00 - United States - Truckee

Today, I was scrolling through a more risqué/dark/dirty humor Facebook page. I thoughtlessly set my phone down to help my cousin with a translation for about a minute. When I went to grab my phone, I saw, front and center, a photo edit of Chewbacca with his "lipstick" out. No wonder she kept glancing down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86

You deserved it 542

Locked

By Anonymous - 19/05/2024 06:00 - United States - Austin

Today, I was in a rush and didn't notice that the bathroom stall I chose at work had a broken lock. Halfway through my business, a coworker barged in. We locked eyes for an awkward eternity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 89

Let's call the whole thing off

By Foreshadowing - 10/12/2025 03:00

Today, I told a customer to “Enjoy your food” as I handed him his receipt instead of his meal. He replied, “You too.” We both froze in silence for a few seconds before he slowly took the bag and walked away in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 230

You deserved it 128

Science, bitch!

By Anonymous - 31/05/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I'm in a new curriculum and I was doing science work online, when a teacher told me I had been doing Grade 7 science this whole semester, all because some stand-in teacher assigned me the wrong thing at the beginning of the year. Time to catch up a whole six months of work. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 459

You deserved it 86

I can't breathe

By Anonymous - 14/12/2025 20:00

Today, my parents promised to drive me to my grandma's house instead of me taking the bus.I was so excited that I could finally have a week away from my suffocating parents but my dad cancelled tonight, so I'm stuck and secretly crying because if they'd have let me take the bus, I'd be at my grandma's, AWAY FROM THEM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 78

Precision strike

By Anonymous - 08/06/2024 06:00 - France - Toulouse

Today, I helped friends move home, and since we couldn't all fit in their car I took the bus. While waiting, my new phone slipped and crashed on the floor. It now has a cracked screen right between my two overpriced phone protectors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 108

Bad dad

By Anonymous - 23/12/2025 22:00

Today, my ex complained that the kids cry too much when they’re with him, so I must be telling them bad things about him. Well maybe if he showed up more than once every 6-8 months, the kids would know him better and be more comfortable with him. Court says I still have to continue give him access. FML

I agree, your life sucks 420

You deserved it 88

How does this keep happening?

By Anonymous - 27/12/2025 15:00

Today, I accidentally liked a coworker’s old social media photo while scrolling at 2 a.m. Panicking, I unliked it immediately, knowing full well notifications exist. The next morning, they casually asked if I was “up late.” I considered quitting my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 390

Big lad

By Stronk - 17/06/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I severely underestimated how strong I am when I attempted to dunk a basketball into a miniature basketball hoop at a swimming pool. I made it, but in doing so I made it fall over, despite the cinder blocks placed on the base specifically to prevent that from happening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 469

Eeeeeek!

By Anonymous - 01/01/2026 22:00

Today, I tried to sneak a yawn during a quiet meeting. Instead, I made a squeaking noise that sounded like a dying mouse. The meeting ground to a halt. Someone asked if I was OK. I was not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 289

You deserved it 152

What gauge strings are you using??

By Anonymous - 07/01/2026 00:00

Today, I forgot to tune my guitar pre-performance. Surprising, because it was in tune when I frantically did it by ear backstage. Too bad two of the six strings snapped, smacking the drummer in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 155

You deserved it 264

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Animals Dogs Gross School Porn Intimacy NSFW Scary Miscellaneous Cops Friends Movies Awkward Clumsy Pizza Delivery Clothes Ironic Work Trans Rights Health Healthy Lifestyle Poopoo peepee Love Divorce Frustration Sex Growing old My ex Pregnancy

The Top

Today, I was talking to myself in the bathroom to remind myself of what chores I need to do. My husband overheard me and is now convinced that I was on the phone with someone. No amount of proof, logic or reasoning can convince him that I'm not cheating on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 892

You deserved it 2 299

Today, I was having coffee with an old friend I hadn't seen since university. I asked about her husband; she replied, "He died" and walked off. I was confused, so I stood up and took off after her. She then reminded me that I was at his funeral, and then slapped me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 165

You deserved it 69 624

Today, I had my first blow job. My girlfriend thought it would be sexy to "caress" my ball sack. By caress she meant bitch slap from side to side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 819

You deserved it 9 527

Today, I got put in Facebook jail for telling a guy fat shaming a girl he was a "s*x*st b*st*rd." Immediately after, FB informed me that a person I reported for threats didn't violate community standards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 359

Today, I've been broke for so long that I felt a pang of envy when a character in a movie said that that they'd bought a tiny cup from a gift shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 859

You deserved it 178

Today, in front of all my family, my grandmother said it was so funny how my brother was my mother’s favorite, while my sister was my father’s favorite. When I asked whose favorite I was, there was silence. From everyone. Including my parents. Guess I know where I’m not wanted now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 964

You deserved it 137