Today, my girlfriend, who collects monthly welfare cheques, demanded that I get a second job so I could buy her more things. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend suggested that she needs a "cuddle buddy" because I'm never home to spend with her. I have to work two jobs to pay the bills because she keeps calling in "sick" from her job. FML
Today, my fiancé and I had a fight over household expenses. He's never had a job in his life, but this didn't stop him demanding that I get another full-time job to pay for video games and beer. FML
Today, after doing vigorous chores all day with my girlfriend, her mom came and paid us each $100. My girlfriend cried and threw a fit because she said they were her chores, so she deserves all the money. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend chooses extra shifts at work over hanging out with me. Every time. She doesn't even like her job. FML
Today, after having loaned my girlfriend money after she claimed to be broke and unable to pay her rent and electricity bills, she went out, spent it all on a new purse and phone, and now refuses to pay me back. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of almost 6 years has put me in debt over $33,000. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she got a hefty bonus at work and will pay off my credit card debt. I was gonna break up with her because I’d been working on resolving things with my ex-girlfriend. FML
Today, I woke up, like every other day, with no girlfriend, no family, no friends, and having to go to my second job. I haven't gotten a day off in months and somehow barely can afford rent. I spend within my means and budget appropriately, but there's always some shit. FML
Today, my girlfriend has become such a workaholic that I found her sitting in her office, soaked in piss. When I called her out, she said she didn't want to take bathroom breaks anymore, and asked me to buy diapers. FML
Today, after weeks of my girlfriend complaining that I don't help with the chores, I secretly took a day off work to deal with some that were piling up. When she got home, all she could do was complain about how I hadn't done more. FML
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Top comments
spinningrecords 14
You know her strategy yet you embrace it. Either get the second job or get rid of her. With one decision things will get much worse and the other decision things should get better… or you can complain about it on FML.
Plop 17
It seems a small typo accidentally crept up in your story, you meant to write "ex-girlfriend", right?
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Comments (5)
RichardPencil 32
She's a boss and you're one of her simps. She's really got a great business model -- get the free government cheese and run a stable of simps. Make them all send wealth her way while only having a tiny of window of time to bang her occasionally. No formal skills required, no licenses needed and no taxes to pay. You should feel honored to work for such a genius!
spinningrecords 14
You know her strategy yet you embrace it. Either get the second job or get rid of her. With one decision things will get much worse and the other decision things should get better… or you can complain about it on FML.
Plop 17
It seems a small typo accidentally crept up in your story, you meant to write "ex-girlfriend", right?
RichardPencil 32
She will be his "ex-girlfriend" only when she lets him. He'll need to petition her for release, pay an application fee and wait for her judgment.
Plop 17
What is she? Some sort of EU council committee?
Nicola Bowie 1
get out
Taurus_ChicKa 37
I hope you mean ex-girlfriend.