Today, I was at work and a very obese woman came in to get a pedicure. When she took her shoes off I noticed an odd black substance on her feet. I started scrubbing it off and wondered out loud, "What IS this stuff??" As a chunk of it fell onto my lip, she replied, "Girl, that's just the fungus." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a customer handed me the ankle-length hosiery she had just used to try on some shoes, and as I sat there feeling the warm dampness of them in the palm of my hand, she said, "You should throw those away, I have a toe fungus." FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML
Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML
Today, at my annual checkup, the doc looks down at my foot and says, "Oh, you have an extra toenail. Six, huh?" Then sort of scraping at the side of my foot below the pinky toe, he pulls off a long piece of dead, dried skin and says, "Oh." FML
Today, I got fed up with the amount of hair on my feet, so I went to get my foot hair waxed off. When I removed my socks, the waxer laughed the amount of foot hair. I'm a 18 year old female and it appears I have feet that were last seen on Big Foot. FML
Today, I moved into college and met my new roommate. Not fifteen minutes later, she had told me about the fungus on her feet, and what happens when she forgets to take her anti-psychotic medication, all while picking at her nose and eating the spoils. FML
Today, I went to get a pedicure for the first time. My feet are VERY ticklish. I reflexively kicked the poor lady in the face, as I wet my pants. FML
Today, I worked in a shoe store. As I was removing the shoes off an older man I felt a squish, and pulled back my hand to see brown and yellow. The man then looked at me and said, "Looks like I missed a spot." Dog crap. FML
Today, I decided to treat myself to a pedicure ahead of my cousin's wedding. The woman doing my nails asked if I wanted my toe hairs trimmed. I was so taken aback and embarrassed that I said yes. They charged me extra. FML
Today, I was eating some cake that my roommate's girlfriend brought by for us. I felt something weird in my mouth, so I stopped chewing to grab it. It was a fingernail. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Amanda_Ruth 0
Oh, dear Jesus. That's disgusting! You poor thing...
drybamboo 0
Um, ew. Someone remind me not to go on this site when I'm eating.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (173)
MayraRaexd 0
LMFAO! that sucks but it made me laugh. Lol @ #12
rockcandy 0
AHHH! Oh dear im so sorry
bradley5055 0
@21 fat women are gross (fat ppl make everything worse just ewww kankles and other grossness [eww fat ppl stink too]) lol u made me throw up in my mouth a little
sparklygummyworm 0
oh god no. that is not right
martha_fml 0
oh no....oh nooo i'm sorry, but sometimes you've just got to refuse a client...this is one of those cases i am so sorry dear
simplysmile 0
saying she is obese just makes it that much more gross of a story. fat feet are gross. fungus is gross. fat feet+fungus= gross times a thousand.
nodbor 11
your lip? were ya sucking her big toe?
amandabee 0
was your mouth under her foot?
whatsup_hollahhh 0
Yeah, you kinda deserve this. I'm a nail tech, and if you thought that something was wrong you should have turned her down. and if you just weren't sure, you should have asked someone or something.
kandy_fml 0
Lap instead of lip would work. The two letters don't have to be near each other for you to mistake one word for another. I agree with #58. Let it go people.