Today, I came to terms with the fact that my boss owns my soul for the bare minimum wage, and has me so whipped that he probably will for the rest of eternity, or until his ancient, withered, necromantic ass dies. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized I have to choose between being unemployed or putting up with my perverted boss who desperately wants me. I'm a guy and so is he. FML
Today, I realized I get paid to hear my boss complain and talk crap. FML
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. I pointed out that due to a technicality, if he hired someone to replace me, he'd have to pay them more anyway. He said he'd gladly pay more for "someone who knows his goddamn place" and made it clear I'll be jobless very soon. FML
Today, my boss bragged to a coworker, in front of me, about how much money he saved on a project because he majorly underpays me. My boss is my dad. FML
Today, my spineless shitwhip of a boss made me go fire a notoriously abusive employee. I had to act like firing him was my decision, even though I'm the secretary. Now I get to live in constant fear that the guy was serious when he threatened to find out where I live and kill me. FML
Today, my boss agreed to a 20% pay rise, in exchange for adding a list of new responsibilities to my job description that will effectively double my workload, which he expects to be carried out in the same 8 hour workday, and not on overtime either. My boss is my dad and I hate him. FML
Today, I asked my boss for a raise, but he told me my position is a legal requirement that produces no profit, unlike every other employee, ergo if I’m feeling ungrateful about my generous wage, he will happily fire me and hire someone else at minimum wage, saving the company money. FML
Today, my boss told me he is a superhero. He has written countless comics about his crusades and adventures. I make fifty dollars an hour less than him. FML
Today, my boss, mentor, and gaming buddy, has officially quit. Turns out even he doesn't get paid enough to deal with this bullshit. FML
Today, I realized that I know, all too well, what it feels like to have my over-middle-age boss's boob on my shoulder. FML
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Top comments
FuckAllOurLives 6
welcome to the real world
flockz 20
call ************ jones.
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Comments (197)
Stylin_Since_97 10
I love you too Mr. Optimistic:)
constantine91 0
Lmao. You allow someone to pretty much own you for minimum wage? Unless you are very young and can only get paid minimum you are very very sad. Find a new job. You deserve this.
sheethapins 13
Am I the only one who read this FML and envisioned an emo kid writing it?
MaloPero 4
what kind of contract did you actually sign? and with whom? devil?
linda_stone 13
You're a pretentious moron man.
truehitman2010 0
this sounds like horible bosses
california283 6
kill your boss like they did in horrible bosses. solution to everything: kill the source of the problem.
kittea86 0
or until u get another job
mikejunior88 4
This is so overly dramatic. Find a new job if it sucks that much.
Rick_S 3
If all you're getting is minimum wage, the only reason to stay at a job you hate is if it will give you experience you need further down the line. If this job is not something related to what you want to do with your life, get out and get another minimum wage job that doesn't suck.
cimh 9
You'd need to add that you don't leave a "shitty" job when you need to pay back money - unless you already have another one!