Today, I had my first game ever as an ice hockey goalie. Our team didn't have a goalie helmet, so they gave me a regular one which didn't cover me completely. I was worried about it and told my coach, but he said I would be fine. I then took a puck to the throat that sent me to hospital. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had my first hockey game after being out with a shoulder injury. I ended up cracking my tail bone. FML
Today, I was at a professional hockey game. I wasn't paying attention and a puck was shot into the stands and hit me in the face. My mouth was bleeding and I lost two teeth. As I was trying to cough up my teeth the old man next to me shoved me over and stole the puck. Everyone cheered. FML
Today, my baseball team had a game and one of our best players was injured sliding into first. I'm pretty fast so when the coach called my name I grabbed a helmet assuming it was finally my chance to get in the game. Turns out he just wanted me to get ice. The entire team couldn't stop laughing. FML
Today, I donated blood for the first time. It wasn't until I passed out on the ice during hockey practice that I remembered the nurse warning me not to do any type of exercise. FML
Today, it was my first time as a hockey referee, for a game played by 7-year-olds. At one point, a little boy tripped another boy. Doing my job, I gave him 2 minutes in the penalty box. After the game, I was attacked by a mob of parents. I was even given an optometrist's business card. FML
Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML
Today, playing soccer, I jumped up to make a header and clear the ball away from our goal. I got the ball but some guy kicked me in the face. I was taken off. All the parents were horrified, saying how badly my nose must have broken. Turns out my nose was fine. That's just how my nose looks. FML
Today, I had a soccer game. A player from the other team hit me in the face. In the next half, she was the goalie and I was determined to score on her. When I finally got my chance to, everyone cheered, until I kicked the ball into the goal post and it bounced back and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I went snowboarding and fell backwards, hitting my head on a patch of ice. When I got home, I told my brother I thought I might have a concussion. He told me I should be a man and suck it, swiftly smacking my head, causing me to pass out. FML
Today, it was my first day of softball practice. I'm the youngest one on the team by about 2 years, so I wanted to prove I'm just as good as everyone else. Too bad I tripped in the outfield and got hit in the head with a bat. I have a concussion. FML
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Top comments
stevenJB 25
Isn't there a rule that says if there's no proper equipment you or the team can't play?? Or get your coach in trouble for that?
karlcolt45 19
heck of a save though, that'll make the highlight reel
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Comments (84)
cobslobin 3
I lol'd.. But sorry about your luck.. Shame on coach
perdix 31
You're not supposed to wear a helmet, you're supposed to wear a mask! Haven't you seen "Friday the 13th," jeez? If it's good enough for Jason, it should be good enough for you.
wannabesinger 16
What helmet did you practice with then?
perdix 31
#31, that's just it, as a goalie, she was just winging it! In her defense, she didn't want to be the center of attention. I'm a punny pucker, don't you think?
Axipiter 24
Two minutes for schticking.
perdix 31
#45, haha, sarcasm is usually my power play, and punning is just the icing on the cake. It stings to get penalized by a Winnipeg Jets fan. Go Pants! (That's my nickname for the Florida Panthers. It hasn't taken off yet, but it will soon enough.)
Axipiter 24
Oh, I am NOT getting into it with a fan of Pants haha. I was GOING to say "bad schticking" to fit better with "high sticking", but it wasn't bad at all haha. I just needed something that wasn't "puck".
perdix 31
#54, good call waving that off. We've won three in a row -- the Pants are on fire! Can't you see how fun a nickname that will be? "Cats" is just too generic.
Axipiter 24
Cats is more appropriate to how they've played most of the season, though. However, if they were the Pants, their mascot could be Dancing Pants! And every now and again someone could light him on fire!
perdix 31
#83, sounds like someone is jealous because they don't have hockey puns. Don't worry -- on April 11, the Jets play the Pants, so things will probably ugly between us ;)
Axipiter 24
And the Jets will take the Pants down.
Sacrilegious666 6
what the puck!!
jessherself13 21
I believe you're required to wear the mask, but I could be wrong. I hope you're okay OP!
cman1322 9
That happens to me all the time... Minus the hospital part
\ 28
Sue his ass and his anus!
ninaskyez 12
Gosh That Had To Hurt Like Crazy!!! Black Mail Him By Saying You'll Sue Hope Your Okay Tho:)
NeinKittenz 20
Capitalization Man Strikes Again
Axipiter 24
Never Gonna Catch Me!
NeinKittenz 20
Their He Is Everyone Lets Get Him!
Sliver1991 26
Never trust others so easily with your own safety. Especially if they seem to wave it off like that!
NeinKittenz 20
Well, at least your not Clint Malarchuck Side Note: don't watch his injury video