Today, my live-in-boyfriend lost his job. Jokingly, I told him that we weren't going to have sex until he found a new job. He then turned to me with the most excited look I have ever seen on his face and said, "I'm going to stay unemployed forever!" He was serious. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after losing his job, I reassured my boyfriend by telling him I'd rather be with him living in a cardboard box than to be without him. He responded by telling me he'd rather be dead. FML
Today, the guy I've been dating said we couldn't see each other anymore because he needed to focus on his career. He's unemployed. FML
Today, my boyfriend came home and said he'd been fired from his minimum wage cashier job. He added that since I make enough to cover the bills, he wants to take a break from "working and shit." I stared at him, mouth agape, and he thought I was offering him a blowjob. FML
Today, I told my unemployed boyfriend to pick a town anywhere in the country that he thinks he can find work in. I offered to find myself a job there, find a flat, and pay for rent, bills, and food while he looks. He said I was selfish for wanting him to hurry up. It's been three years. FML
Today, my boyfriend has been unemployed for over six months. He has applied EVERYWHERE with no luck, but he also has the opportunity to start his own business. Instead, he just spends his time sitting in front of the TV all day long. I'm starting to believe he is not a driven man, and I hate that. FML
Today, my boyfriend jokingly said that if I didn't pass my exam, he wouldn't have sex with me for a month. I failed it, and now he thinks I did it on purpose. FML
Today, I quit my job and sent a mass mail on Facebook that I was moving to a different state with my long time boyfriend. He called me later that night to tell me we aren't moving after all. Now we are both jobless with loads of bills to pay by the end of the month. FML
Today, my unemployed boyfriend and I went to the casino. I gave him twenty dollars to play on. He won $1000 on a dollar machine then jackpotted the ten dollar machine for $20,000. When we got home he broke up with me. I have been working two jobs to get our own place. Move in Date?? 2 weeks. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted me to sleep over at his house. Then he found out that it was that time of the month for me, so he told me that he had to work this weekend and said "see you sometime next week." He doesn't have a job. FML
Today, my landlord told me he is raising my rent next month. I thought he was kidding until he asked if I still wanted to live here. My landlord is also my live-in boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
jkozzy 8
If he hates having sex with you that much, he doesn't deserve you.
DeadxManxWalking 27
It's not like he's forced to have sex with you.
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Comments (148)
SLC_grumpypants 5
Using sex as a "tool" doesn't work on every man. It certainly doesn't work with me. The men who do fall for that b.s. need their "man card" revoked!!
Pandacupcakelove 26
I'm sorry, my comment didn't show the first time... Go ahead, thumb me down :P
anyav3 13
LOL! You must be horrible in bed!!!
thewife5 19
For once I'm going to say... Lose that dirtbag, he has nothing physically or financially worth contributing to your dead end relationship. I could not image a response like that:(
shizzlemonkeys 5
Live-in boyfriend? Make him your live-out ex, simple.
n1988e 8
Maybe he was just using reverse psychology on. He made u curious about why he said that so you now not only you will have sex with him, but you'll also make it more steamier to change his mind.
Factor_fml 6
Or she'll just reconsider a relationship with someone who doesn't find her attractive in any way.
perdix 31
(Unemployed live-in boyfriend) - sex = Parasitic roommate Sometimes math is the best way to say it.
alfred07 18
I'd dump him, you deserve to be with someone who wants to have sex with you.
bizarre_ftw 22
Any chance your place is nicer than anywhere he could hope to get?
HairyPunisher 27
Are you dating Al Bundy?