Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was, if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I rear ended a cop while talking on my cell phone. FML
Today, I had the cops called on me for acting suspiciously. I was using a payphone. FML
Today, I saw someone drive recklessly as if they were drunk. When I called the cops, I got pulled over by another cop for talking on my cell phone. FML
Today, I got pulled over for going a few miles per hour over the speed limit. The cop asked for my license and registration. I happened to look down at my wallet while he was processing everything and saw my license in my wallet. I gave the cop my fake I.D. FML
Today, I was getting groceries and realized at checkout that I forgot my wallet. The cashier gave me a sympathetic look as I frantically tried to unlock my phone to pay with an app, and watched as I accidentally called my ex on speakerphone. FML
Today, a stranger asked to borrow my phone since his had died. As he was using it, he kept walking away and I had to chase him because he was walking too far. He turned around, yelled, "Stop following me, asshole!" and punched me, knocking me out cold. When I came to, I realized the fucker stole my phone. FML
Today, I got pulled over for talking on my phone while driving. I'd lost my phone the day before. He didn’t believe me. So, I got a ticket for talking on a phone I can’t even find. FML
Today, I got pulled over by a state trooper for speeding. When he saw I had something in my pocket, he began to ask if it was a weapon. After arguing for a few minutes I was put in handcuffs. I was too embarrassed to pull the tampon out my pocket. FML
Today, I was pulled over by a cop. He asked for my license and registration, so I reached for my center console. I was then greeted with a gun to my ear because my coffee cup supposedly looked like a gun. I stepped out of my car to apologize, and I was hit with a big stick. FML
Today, I was driving when I noticed that the guy in front was on the phone. I pulled up next to him, pulled out my phone and I made a gesture that he needed to put his phone away. It was a cop. I got a ticket for driving while on my cell phone. FML
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Top comments
Cortezthe1st 23
YDI for drinking underage.
munchie_omnom 10
Go home you're drunk
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Comments (132)
Vickeh 15
YDI for under age drinking. That officer should have slapped you with a hefty fine.
Sariasprincy 7
I bet the officer got a good laugh! At least you probably amused him - which most likely got you out of trouble
AFaye3964 17
Somebody should've came and got you.
sayhey22 19
Somebody shouldn't have been drinking
gracehi 33
Drunk and under age in Morocco of all places! Oh man!
VerbalVenom 16
You can buy alcohol in Morocco at the age of 16, and you can legally drink at any age. They do not have a "legal drinking age".
haleyrob 8
I can't feel sorry for you. At least you were walking home though, and not drinking and driving!
knippy 9
I love how everyone is all high and mighty saying "You shouldn't be drinking underage" when a majority of them probably did the same. My big issue isn't with the drinking but the walking around in public afterwards, public intoxication, where I come from, can get you slapped with more fines than underage drinking. Why not just spend the night where you'd been drinking? Or had a friend come pick you up?
Respect101 17
In the US, and at least Texas you can get busted for public intoxication. I'm not telling him not to drink but to at least if he does drink is not to get caught.
Sigilwen 24
#44 reading that for made me think of Ron White.
Respect101 17
Yeah he was born in Texas.. and I guess it does sound like something he would say.
SjoyousS 4
never under estimate a sober cop with an un sober mind. Did he write you up or anything/.
destructor2014 3
Wait...it's not normal to talk to your wallet? Now you tell me...
miss_amphetamine 24
Lol I'm a drunk over-21 not-teenager and this is still hilarious.
russiancat464 12
lmaooo you mustve been pretty shitfaced