Today, while working at a restaurant, I told an old couple that their “vibrator will go off when a table is available.” I meant to say pager. They walked out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked a table at a restaurant if there's anything I could get out of their way and they replied, "Yeah, you." FML
Today, while I was waitressing, I bent down to pick up a menu and accidentally farted, really loud, at my table. FML
Today, as a waitress I served someone who was hoping their food would come back faster than expected. I replied, “Fingers crossed!” just for the person to show me they had no hands. FML
Today, at work, I got to wait on one of those tables where everyone had very complex orders, and some of them sent their food back. When the time finally came for me to bring them their check and receive my well-earned tip, I returned only to discover that they'd dined and dashed. FML
Today, I was taking people's orders at the drive-thru. I was confused as to why people were screaming their orders at me, until one of my managers handed me a paper that he'd found taped to the menu, saying "speak loudly speaker isn't working properly." Punkd. FML
Today, I was taking a table's order. After I finished, the guy told me, "Just FYI, I'm not a tipper." Trying to lighten up the situation, I replied, "It's amazing how many people forget I handle their food." He complained to the manager that I'd threatened him. FML
Today, while checking out a couple at work, I handed them their receipt and wished them a good day. The woman promptly pulled her husband to the side, and whispered to him about how much of a "fucking idiot" I was for making the prices so high. I work at McDonald's. FML
Today, at work as a manager at pizza place, I got yelled by a customer because they got one fewer paper plates than they asked for. FML
Today, I was working at a local restaurant when another server's table called me over to ask if I've "ever killed anybody". They informed me I looked like a serial killer. I informed them, of course, that I have never killed anybody. Another customer claimed I scared her child. I was fired. FML
Today, while waiting on a customer at a restaurant, I accidentally asked a midget if she'd like a children's menu. FML
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Top comments
interesting33 37
I feel like their reaction was quite an overreaction... it is very natural to say vibrator for that.
Donut_Wizard 23
When they walked out, did they take the pager with them?
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Comments (17)
Lobby_Bee 18
Those dirty old people. SMH
Tarlachia 33
OP, I know you ended up taking on an unplanned overnight shift... did you return to your car only to find it smeared with tacos?
Glowworm56 27
Well that is definitely what it does, so it really wasn't a slip-up.
my2centsworth 15
Perhaps they went home to get their vibrator so they would know when their table was ready.
Ali Alexandrea 16
what an overreaction, who acts like such a dick over an obviously innocent mistake, it's not like you used an actually crass word in front of them
3ziam3lia 14
I think vibrator is a perfectly normal saying for something like that. I’ve heard it many times in restaurants and never thought twice.