Today, while standing in line at the video store, I happen to notice a very hot young girl on the TV screen, and mentioned to my friend that I'd "hit that." I was immediately punched by the girl in front of me. Seems the hot girl on TV was her on a security monitor. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML
Today, I was at the store when I saw two extremely hot girls. I walked into their aisle and they looked at me and smiled. I stopped and pretended to look at something so I could listen to what they were saying. They started laughing and walked away. It turned out I was reading a box of tampons. FML
Today, I caught myself yelling at the girl in the porn I was watching for looking at the camera every other second. FML
Code pink
Today, I was working at a grocery store when a couple of my co-workers called a code pink in aisle 22, which means there was an attractive woman in that aisle. After hearing about how hot she was, I went over to see her for myself. It was my mom. FML
Hot wheels
Today, I was in an elevator, and the hot girl who lives in my building and who I have a crush on got in. She was in a wheelchair with a broken leg, I panicked and tried to flirt with her, and I said, "Nice chair." She replied, "Nice bruise" and punched me in the nuts. FML
Today, I was sitting with a friend who moved back into town, and he told me about how he hooked up with a girl at a bar last night. I asked him if she was hot, he responded "Yeah, I have a picture of her on my phone." It was a picture of my girlfriend. FML
On Target, almost
Today, I was walking through Target when I was pulled aside by a very attractive girl who began kissing me. She stopped, because I wasn't who she thought I was. Disappointed, I turned around to see her very angry, very large boyfriend behind me. FML
Today, my sister ran into my room unannounced while I was on webcam with a potential employer. Before I could react, she looked at my screen, said "Damn, he's fucking hot." and flashed him. FML
She definitely heard
Today, I had to go to the mall for a quick errand. While there one of my friends who works at a phone booth was there and I stayed for a little bit chatting with him. While chatting, a girl passed by. She was so pretty that I blurted out, "What a woman!" out loud. Turns out it was my ex. FML
Today, I was shopping in the mall. A cute store worker kept checking me out, so after I picked a few things I went up to her and started flirting. After a few seconds, she cut me off and said, "Actually I was watching you because you look like someone who would shoplift." FML
Top comments
Zebidee 9
Creepy and an idiot. A winning combination.
Xaviexis 6
I guess she'd hit you right back. I figure though that anyone who thinks OP deserves it condones physical abuse as a justifiable response to an admittedly somewhat inappropriate comment. If the genders were reversed and a guy hit a girl OP for making a similar comment, would the OP still deserve it? I smell a double standard here.
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Comments (158)
Zebidee 9
Creepy and an idiot. A winning combination.
xlord 27
Looks like she also wanted to "hit that"
Deathhound 27
Haha, yep!
RandomBlackMan 0
What happened after?
baconftw 9
Pwned.
gojira666 7
Wow that extremely out of focus, grainy, black and white girl is hot!
white16sox 19
Would she rather op say I wouldn't hit that in a million years?
tatababe 1
Haha OP at least she got to "hit that"
Bobissmall 13
I hope OP hit her back. Got to fight for that right to freedom of speech!
shayundead 9
lmao good one.
Humanspider 18
Women get offended over everything.
sugarbaby9908 20
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Some people just don't know how to take a compliment, sorry man
missL1z 5
A compliment is when he thinks I'm the most amazing girl in the world, not when he thinks I'm only good for that.
slick5880 22
I think it's all relative to the person the comment is directed to and the sex of the person making the comment. If a woman told me that, I'd take it as a complement, but should the comment come from a guy, an ass beating would be the least of his worries.
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
9 - you seriously think random strangers should say that to you? I think you and your ego need to get a room.
eog314 0
9 - "a compliment is when he thinks I'M the most amazing girl in the world..." since when did this fml become all about you? for all we know you can be some old, nasty pedophile.
RedPillSucks 33
It's annoying when I'm in a line and someone tells me I'm the most amazing girl in the world. It's worse when they say "those pants make your butt look big"
hailphire130 0
How did I know that a buried comment was going to come after 2's comment?
BlackFireGeisha 4
That's not a compliment. It's objectification, and most women don't appreciate it.
Bobissmall 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
An objectification? Really? If anything it is a compliment at the very roots of human instinct. "I find that woman attractive and healthy enough to want to mate with" It's a compliment. Women are weird.
leadman1989 16
And what ISN'T objectification? In terms of mean and women flirting/hitting on each other?
Bobissmall 13
"i love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you" "Omg you just see me as an object for love, you're horrible!" It's impossible to win.
humorizer 14
"I think you are worthy of taking my money in exchange for long term sex. Here's a ring to prove that I'm wiling to give you money throughout your life for sex." "I do!" "Huh?" "You asked if I'd marry you. I said I would." "But I said sex for mo... oh.... right, right... Marriage. That's what you guys call it nowadays." See? That would work.
abouttofly 12
Complimenting someone on their sexual attractiveness can be nice, if you're flirting with them, or in a relationship. But doing it to a stranger is just creepy.
dmw25 0
Just leave, youre a bum. Get no action
Mikemfm88 6
I would bang u ;)
smashmaster52 0
I'm pretty sure that was sarcasm
springbok_fml 2
how did you not realise ?!
yomommma 6
I would have beeb flattered
yomommma 6
Been*
Xaviexis 6
I guess she'd hit you right back. I figure though that anyone who thinks OP deserves it condones physical abuse as a justifiable response to an admittedly somewhat inappropriate comment. If the genders were reversed and a guy hit a girl OP for making a similar comment, would the OP still deserve it? I smell a double standard here.
Petronix 5
Excellent comment and absolutely right.
muchagente 5
If genders where reversed, girls hitting boys were a standard and menacing situation, and therefore not in any way funny. so you are right.
nonelikeworms 0
There are a lot if double standards with men and women such as a woman can openly say that a guy is hot but a guy can't say a girl's hot without being called a pervert. Same with the entire "guys can't hit girls". I actually got in trouble because I hit a girl who was attacking me with a collinder (think that's how you spell it). The world is a funny place huh?
DjeePee 25
I voted YDI because OP didn't notice that it was a security monitor. The difference between something on the tv or something on a security monitor is very easy to tell. I do absolutely not agree with the punching and I am one of the few girls who don't have double standards (and therefore I think that, with a good reason, guys are allowed to hit girls just like girls are allowed to hit boys).
larisonr 4
Or maybe nobody should be hitting anybody.
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
Same goes for same-sex punching. Who gives a **** who's hitting who? Violence solves nothing..as much as I hate to admit it.
eog314 0
there are double standards for both men and women. I don't like it. 4 - that was well written and I agree
skokob 7
Yah but If a guy heard a woman say that he say here I am!
aFatFuck 0
Well, basically because most men are physically stronger than women so people think when a man hits a woman he must be hurting her and she needs help, when it's reversed people think the guy can handle it himself.
theybebitchin 4
Got in trouble by who?!
Xaviexis 6
Well, violence does solve the question of how to make some action movies more interesting or how to kill time in a Family Guy episode that would otherwise run short by bringing in a giant chicken fight... As far as real violence is concerned, it's more of a case of either causing or perpetuating way more problems than it actually does solve or shifts the problem from one person to another (solving it for one, causing it for another). Bear in mind, America used violence to establish independence from British rule and to successfully abolish slavery but on the other hand, Canada managed to do those same things with pens and paper.
Pixii 0
There are always double standard when it's comes to men and woman. For Example: It's totally fine for my ex boyfriend to cheat on me multiple times with multiple women, but when he finds out I allowed a guy to flirt with me, all of a sudden I'm the ****.
hotaro15 3
No your boyfriend is just an ass for cheating on u.
humorizer 14
Yeah, I agree with the guy above me. Though if you want double standards: "My boyfriend cheated on me." - "Kick him in the balls and dump him." "My girlfriend cheated on me." - "Kick her in the ******** and dump her" Nah... I'm kidding. You know no one would say that. Here's what our sexist world WOULD actually say: - "Oh, man up and find someone else." OR - "Kick the other guy in the balls and dump her."
punkrocker092 0
Amen sir
xcutioner 0
Great philosophy gotta say
vono360 0
Welcome to America
Allyrocks113000 0
Ok, that's mostly true, except that even thought guys have to buy the flowers and be really nice, girls have their periods as well as pregnancy.... I'd trade with a guy anytime!
Midrash 5
Meh... Would have said the same thing
RandomBlackMan 0
But you're a guy.
blueyes97 0
Of course you would have mr. Steroids
GigaPudding_fml 24
Seems like she'd hit you too!
ADayToPierceTheV 0
I like turtles
ADayToPierceTheV 0
I like turtles
glittercookies 12
Lmao
itsalanis 25
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
lol, derp. people need to lighten up. she should've been thankful for the compliment.
t4bigj01 0
your an ass