Today, while my boyfriend and I were in the shower, we began to get a bit frisky. That was until I lifted my arms and he immediately made one of his "Chewbacca Calls." He was referring to my armpits that I had forgotten to shave. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML
Today, I was about to go and take a shower when I saw a pair of scissors taped to the door at eye level with a note from my boyfriend saying "Time to trim that hairy thang down under." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally alone and things were starting to get intimate. I was on top of him trying to be sexy, when in my excitement I giggled and called him a "silly girl" by accident. FML
Today, my boyfriend started affectionately calling me "Burt Reynolds" because I wax my upper lip. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML
Today, me, my boyfriend and his family stayed at an AirBnB while on a trip. While I was doing my makeup, my boyfriend told me he was going to take a shower. A few minutes later, I went in the bathroom to shave my legs thinking my boyfriend was in there, but his dad was in the shower, scrubbing his ass. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML
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Top comments
kwchambers92 10
You seem like a "furry" nice lady
RoseTintMyWorld 8
That would be my problem with getting frisky in the shower, I feel like I'd have to tell them to wait 10 minutes before coming in so I could have time to shave and wash my hair/body. I'd feel awkward other wise.
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Comments (173)
ladyLALAA 29
Get him to plait it. Kidding. It's called maintenance OP!
tayza249 20
I doubt that the boyfriend shaves HIS armpits..
bramberkhout 10
Do you want him too? And carry your bag and jewellery as wel?
KrazyKatz3 26
Yes... he should shave if he expects it... hairy armpits are gross whatever you have going on in your pants....
T1A2Z3 35
Yes
MandyMeow_fml 18
It happeneds sometimes. Your boyfriend shouldn't have made fun of you. Don't let it get to you :)
yahoowizard 16
Well, not like he left her or even the shower for that matter. I think he dealt with it perfectly rather than just keeping it to himself or making a big serious deal about it
teyyoshi 19
every time i read a story, there are so many words i dont know, i have to look up a dictionary , but i still cant get the exact meaning afterwards.what a retard i am!!
ICATiger 13
It's a slow process learning a new language. Don't call yourself a retard just cause you don't know a few words. I've been studying french for 3 years now and I'm still terrible at it but i'm getting better and learning more words everyday.
ohSNAPyall 27
FML: the perfect learning tool?
Silentstrike 11
Your doing great man, dont get discouraged!
leslieluu 0
It happens :)
Blooblibloo 4
Learning another language is not easy! I like to read FML because I learn lots of words I wouldn learn in an english class and which are really useful in a real conversation with real people. Good luck!
teyyoshi 19
23 i have learned english for 6 years, but i just can read words in my english books, a lot of stories here are hilarious for you, but for me they are just some sentences with complex words, i cant find any reason to laugh....BTW i often read ur comments
Vasin_fml 15
^ Very true. In this case, I'm guessing you might not know what Chewbacca is, he is a character from a movie. He is very hairy and speaks in strange sounds not english.
twisted_cherub 14
24 - "afterward" means what took place directly following the mentioned event (i.e. We had dinner. Afterward, we had dessert.) There isn't supposed to be an "s" on the end. I hope that helps.
benderbot19 0
It's one thing to learn a language, it's a whole other thing to be able to understand the jokes, culture etc.
CptZoe 10
Next time he has some face stubble do the same! It is better he did it in a joke way, how gutted would you be if he had, say, turned the shower off and left!
rattusrattus 19
If my boyfriend had done that? Yeah, I would have turned off the shower and left, then got out my vibrator. I know every woman has different hair growth, but I generally have to forget for about five days before I get anything substantial (approx. 1cm) - so, wookie? Really? (Basing this off my own pit-shaving schedule of every other day, and assuiming the OP forgot once.)
twisted_cherub 14
That was my thought. If I forget (or am too lazy) to shave one day, my boyfriend wouldn't even be able to see the hair. I'm thinking she forgot to shave a little more than in one shower. Or, she only showers once a week so forgetting once is enough to go wookie.
skyeyez9 25
So you can match us with our fml submissions and make fun of us in person?
wittygirl 8
Talk about foreplay 8D
IKickPuppiesHard 16
Honestly I doubt he meant to offend her seeing as how there are worst things he could have said to achieve that effect. More or less just poking fun at her. Though if he knew she wouldn't find it funny I agree, he could have toned it down.
DocBastard 40
Not shaving was a wookie mistake.
theretartedone 5
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I think u mean rookie
ICATiger 13
33-It's a pun.....
cc_the_beast 6
No, pretty sure he means wookie. Touché Doc, touché....
reaganomics 6
33- Let the wookie win
desireev 18
Hey Doc! I think this is the best pun I've seen yet! For some reason, this one made me laugh so hard!!
WordSmyth 2
See #s 10 & 14, Now this is a pun.