Today, while attempting to sneak out of my boyfriend's parents' house during my walk of shame, I fell down the stairs, spilling cherry coke all over myself, their walls, and the carpet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my ex-boyfriend came over to visit. Being nice, I let him walk down the stairs first, following after him. I still managed to reach the bottom before he did; after taking one step, I lost my footing and fell all the way down, scraping the skin off my arms and legs, and bruising my butt. FML
Today, I was walking down the street when a homeless man asked me for some spare change. I told him I didn't have any. I then tripped. Not only spilling the soda I was drinking all over myself, but also spilling the spare change I had from buying it. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was sneaking out before my parents awoke, he slipped on some ice and fell on their car. The alarm went off. FML
Today, I was craving a cold Coke, so I grabbed one from the freezer where I had put it to chill quickly. As soon as I opened it, the can exploded all over me and the kitchen. I spent the next hour cleaning sticky residue off the floor, surrounding furniture, and even the ceiling. FML
Today, at a house party someone smashed and spilled their drink. In my own drunken state, I decided to get the mop as someone might fall. I then fell over it and ended up with glass in my side. FML
Today, I was moving out of my old place. While walking around to make sure I would get my damage deposit back, I stepped on my roommate's lipstick and smeared it all over the white carpet. Then I tripped on the phone cord and ripped the whole thing out of the wall. FML
Today, I drank cocktails and shots. On the way home, I had to pee so bad that I only got to the front door and peed all over our carpet. My mom saw the whole thing and my dad saw the aftermath with the super drenched carpet and shoes. My mom had to mop the floor after I ran to the bathroom. FML
Today, I tried to go down the stairs two steps at a time. I slipped, fell flat on my ass, and busted my lower lip against my overbite. When I tried to get up, I realized I had also peed my pants. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. Within seconds of getting my drink, I spilled it all over the table and my scarf. When the waiter was helping clean up the spill, he knocked over my boyfriend's drink. All over my pants. FML
Today, I remembered my mom got her carpet cleaned and to be careful while she was at work. To be nice, I vacuumed the whole house. Feeling proud of myself, I got a drink and went upstairs. I tripped and spilled red Kool-Aid all over the floor. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Spilling cherry pop after getting your cherry popped? There's just something poetically beautiful about that.
awardZu 0
You should be more careful when you do you walk of shame. It's a proud tradition, and you have tainted it with cherry coke. Shame on you!
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Comments (149)
ivanoff 0
I my self have done the walk of shame... you need to keep your head up while making this walk. be proud. you just banged the hell out of there offspring... now maybe they will do there chores (assuming they have chores because they still live with there parents) sometimes a simple thumbs up works during this walk. or a possible high five.
ivanoff 0
ya supper sorry I suck at spelling. or should I say grammar? I'll make sure their spelt right next time...
ivanoff 0
I always thought 'their' is a bull shit word. I before E, except after C...
Sprocket 5
There are so many exceptions to that rule that they stopped teaching it... Just to show how sadistic our language is.
cptmorgan15 2
Ivanoff, you are the worst.
ivanoff 0
ya thanks bud, I really care what you think...
Mebekatya 0
...tastes just like cherry cola. C-O-L-A, COLA!!
RedPillSucks 33
Yeah but there's something I don't understand... Why she ***** like a woman but falls like a man. LOLA, L O L A LOLA, bring my Cherry Cola
noeryu 1
Ok I'm feeling kinda stupid but isn't the walk of shame after a one night stand not a night with your boyfriend?
Rashadd 6
yeah I thought so too...
Taipan_fml 0
Yeah, I get the feeling that some women use the term simply to make themselves seem more scandalous.
kirsty777 3
the parents probably didn't know. that or op and the bf are quite young.
TheDrifter 24
It's also used when leaving somewhere you shouldn't have been doing the nasty. There just isn't a better term for that. Or he was terrible and this will be the only time for them.
noeryu 1
Ok I'm feeling kinda stupid but isn't the walk of shame after a one night stand not a night with your boyfriend?
Taipan_fml 0
I always thought the term "walk of shame" applied more to someone who was leaving (or getting kicked out of) a one night stand's house. Usually in the same rumpled clothing and perhaps smeared makeup as the night before and therefore looking pretty trashy. Not someone who was leaving the house of a boy/girlfriend. Hence the word "shame" in there... most people don't feel shame at spending the night with a significant other (unless they're high school youngins, probably OP's case).
TheFection 0
yeah you make a good point…
xMRxLAMAx 0
That's what I would've figured?
beastin34 0
lmao no shame just know u ain't gunna be back their anytime soon
apology89 2
And abstinence once again could have prevented something horrible
SirEBC 7
Abstinence is the opposite of sex. Sex is good. Therefore, abstinence is the opposite of good.
ReynshineCutting 10
^ Win
JenL_fml 7
Ok, I kind of support abstinence, but I fail how that would have prevented her from tripping down the stairs. She could have done that without having sex... Unless her boyfriend is just that good... o.o
Thomas_Rothbard 0
and that's why ppl think women are smarter than men. when you use faulty logic like that. Plato is turning in his grave
JenL_fml 7
fail to see*, btw
SirEBC 7
50, if you want to have a discussion on logic, PM me. Oh, and I suggest you come a little harder than that.
HeJustKnowsBest 3
Abstinence are for those who can't get any and therefore use that as an excuse. #43: Sex is like Pizza. When the Pizza is good, it's REALLY good, but when the pizza is bad, it's better than not having pizza at all.
meteor_stream 9
Unless you get a food poisoning from it.
JenL_fml 7
55, that's not entirely true.
YouCanHaveACoke 0
lmbo, SirEBC!
HeJustKnowsBest 3
It's foolish to practice abstinence before marriage (or before finding the right someone), there's plenty of time not to have sex after you get married and have 5 children, but you'll find that out when it's too late.
Taipan_fml 0
That doesn't mean you have to or even should have sex with anything that crosses your path (back to your pizza analogy). There's a happy medium between abstinence and having sex with so many randoms you lose count of them... and whatever viruses you pick up from them. Also, having sex just to have sex, even when it's bad, is just pointless.
faithe92 0
not the cherry coke! oh god no
FudgeInMyLife 3
Don't play the Abstinence card.
alaskasfml 0
^it's not even in the deck
katiebells 0
so it was more like a fall of shame, then?