Today, to help with my insomnia, I downloaded some relaxing rain MP3s and set them to loop. For the first time in ages, I fell asleep within minutes. Somewhere around 5, however, the sound of trickling water caused my bladder to empty itself all over my bed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I awoke to a series of almighty explosions in the middle of the night. Turns out I fell asleep with my AirPods in to a “Soothing rain” soundtrack, which had turned to “Storms and thunder” at some point. I pissed the bed. FML
Today, I went to sleep at 7am. I learned once that Indians used to drink tons of water before bed to force themselves awake so I did that in case my alarm (which I hooked up to my speakers) didn't work. The alarm worked, but the shock of the blasting sound made me pee my pants. FML
Today, I found out that the peaceful rain I'd been listening to all night was really a broken water-main flooding my entire yard. FML
Today, my water pills are almost identical to my sleeping pills, so not only did I not get any sleep, I had to get up every 15-30 minutes to go to the bathroom. FML
Today, I slept through my alarm because it was drowned out by humming. My humming, in my sleep. Even my body is against me waking up on time. FML
Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom and took a massive piss. Then I actually woke up, well and truly soaked. FML
Today, as a lifelong insomnia sufferer, I was having an awful night. After tossing and turning in my bed for several hours, I decided to try sleeping on the couch. Not only did I finally fall asleep, I was having one of the best dreams of my life… Until my neighbor’s brat had a tantrum at 6 a.m. FML
Today, after having hardly any sleep the whole weekend, I was woken up at 3:30 am by the sound of running water. I opened my eyes to find my fiancé peeing in my favorite water bottle. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my own voice yelling, “GET UP, YOU LAZY CUNT!” on repeat. It took me a moment to remember I'd drunkenly recorded my own alarm last night because I thought it would “motivate” me. It scared me so much I fell off the bed. FML
Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML
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Top comments
Pleonasm 36
MPee3 player did you say?
Olympiakos10 15
I guess those weren't the wet dreams you were hoping for.
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Comments (65)
kpc2424 13
Good thing it wasn't the sound of diarrhea!!!!
rg350dx 29
The sound of diarrhea usually puts me right out. I have to be careful in public restrooms though, as I usually fall face first off the throne if someone comes in with a bad case of mud butt.
hcollins1 18
Oh yes I agree, the soothing sounds of grunting and the roar of the flow puts me right to bed.
nikhilmanuel 10
Wow, those things work, but the sounds did the same thing to me too! Don't worry, you're not alone!
doodlebug33 20
I guess the MP3 worked too well
caohm 18
bear grylis favorite way to fall asleep
sematariux 7
This sounds a bit like the subliminal messaging post just under this fml. Sucks OP, bet you were (puts on shades) pissed..
swordidfate 13
NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
jabi3jabi3 8
I believe you can set it to shut off at one point.
perdix 31
Tomorrow night, sleep naked in your bathtub. Problem solved!
texashater75 16
Well, now that you have a waterbed, maybe you'll sleep better. I always sleep good in my waterbed. In my case I just used water to fill it up, but to each their own.
natalyeah 3
you have to download the theta wave app. they have options other than water, and it puts you right to sleep sans the peeing.
Obey_StudBoii 23
Have a good sleep? lol