Today, on vacation, I had my first encounter with a macaw parrot, who promptly bit my ear and shat on me while amused tourists laughed and took pictures. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I got a bird as a pet. I thought it would be funny to put it on my head and take a picture. When the flash went off the bird flew off my head and pooped at the same time. You could see it in the picture. FML
I am very hungry
Today, a bird flew into the workshop where I work, gave itself a tour of the place, then promptly pooped on my lunch and left. FML
Get the **** outta here, kid
Today, I tried to take a picture next to a peacock, but ended up running away with a face and mouth full of feathers. FML
Impressive
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. In his front room was a giant parrot. Hoping to impress them, I went over to the bird and began talking to it proving I wasn't scared. Out of nowhere, it's beak clenched onto my nose making it gush blood on the carpet. I was hospitalized. FML
Face your fears!
Today, I decided to confront my fear of birds when my friend's pet bird was walking up to me. He got on my arm, climbed up, and attacked my face. FML
The zoo
Today, I was walking in the kitchen with my parrot on my shoulder and my dog running around. Something freaked out my bird and she bit my ear and started flapping her wings in my face. Surprised, I took a step back, tripped over my dog, fell, hit my head on the stove, and got knocked unconscious. FML
Today, I was asleep in my back garden and woke up when a bird landed on my hat and took a big shit right in my open mouth. FML
Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML
Today, I walked under a tree and heard birds chirping from above. I stopped and looked up, only to catch a face full of bird shit. FML
Today, just when I thought my day couldn't get any worse, a bird shat on my lunch. FML
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
I hope you mean ex-parrot! The only reason that parrot had been sitting on his perch is that he had been nailed there!
awildwhisper 30
On the bright side you might get internet fame with all those photos.
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Comments (5)
RichardPencil 32
I hope you mean ex-parrot! The only reason that parrot had been sitting on his perch is that he had been nailed there!
awildwhisper 30
On the bright side you might get internet fame with all those photos.
RichardPencil 32
Like that guy that got murdered on Facebook? So not worth it!
Manual_Manoosy 21
That's Amazing!!
Manual_Manoosy 21
It is an amazing picture, one of my favorites from that vacation.