Anonymous
Findlay, United States
Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a Diet Coke?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
J
United States
Today, at lunch I ordered a Coke. The waiter replied, "Diet Coke?" and I corrected him saying, "No, regular Coke." He shook his head and said again, "Diet Coke." FML
goldendarkness
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to stop by a drive-thru on the way to his place. I asked him to order a Coke for me, at which point he asked if I wanted to make it a Diet Coke. FML
hadrienne's pall
Markham, Canada
Sorry, I didn't mean…
Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML
Hungryman
France
Today, I ordered a Diet Coke with my meal from a fast food restaurant. Turns out, they didn't give me diet. My blood sugar spiked and I was sick for hours later. I'm a diabetic. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Gloucester, United States
Thanks Karen
Today, I was taking a customer's order when she said she'd better go for a salad, because she was getting fat. She was actually very slim, so I told her she wasn't fat at all. She took one look at me and snorted, "Yeah, not compared to you, that's for sure." FML
first time at McDonald's in months...
United States
Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML
Anonymous
First impressions
Today, while on a date, I accidentally ordered "diet water" instead of saying "diet coke". FML
nerd
Singapore
Typecast
Today, I was on cloud nine when the beautiful waitress I frequently ordered takeaways from told me she didn't need to take my name as she remembers me from before. When I got my food, I saw the sales slip. On it she had written, "Cheeseburger - Fries - Coke - Nerdy guy with bad haircut." FML
Anonymous
United States
Mr Bean
Today, I was at a work lunch, and the waiter brought me a soda I hadn’t ordered. I thought it was a free mistake, so I took a sip. It was actually my boss’s drink. As soon as I noticed, I tried to give it back, but he just stared at me and said, "It’s fine. I’ve already seen you drink it now." FML
fatty
West Chester, United States
Assume the worst, huh?
Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML
Top comments
plasticsmile42 2
Wow, what an ass. dont let him/her get to you op!
MainPrism 16
I really hope you obeyed the cardinal rule of the food industry & waited til after you got your food before telling the waiter what you thought of them... If not, you ate something extra with your food... Pretty much gauranteed...
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Comments (265)
Dravite 9
No, but Ms. Pissed-Off would like to speak to your manager.
The_Thinker 18
And that's when you go, "Let me guess, Mr I'm-Not-Rude-I'm-Funny wants a knuckle sandwich?".
Octwo 16
Pay 85% of the bill and leave a note telling him you left him a 15% tip.
lastrael 3
Ask to talk to the manager, or whoever is in charge of the restaurant.
bubo_fml 11
"I'm not only fluffy, but extremely incontinent!" Proceed to urinate all over the seat, table, floor, the waiter...
Plaasmaa 4
So you're fat and got told so?
rock78_fml 6
You should have said " And let me guess, you're the jerk I was sent to spy on, you're fired!"
CassieBoo143 12
Gabriel Iglesias!!
Cryogenix 12
Gotta admit, fat people have a tendency to order crap and then a diet drink. And to the people that tell you you're not fat but beautiful: STOP BEING ENABLERS.
TheOtherNewest1 6
I've seen "fat" people who are sexier than some thin people I've seen. Just like I've seen older women who are sexier than younger women. I'm not saying this is the rule, but to assume that everyone is ugly because they're fat is stupid. Also, I found this to be somewhat funny, but if someone said that to me, I'd ******* hit them.