Anonymous
First impressions
Today, while on a date, I accidentally ordered "diet water" instead of saying "diet coke". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
J
United States
Today, at lunch I ordered a Coke. The waiter replied, "Diet Coke?" and I corrected him saying, "No, regular Coke." He shook his head and said again, "Diet Coke." FML
Hungryman
France
Today, I ordered a Diet Coke with my meal from a fast food restaurant. Turns out, they didn't give me diet. My blood sugar spiked and I was sick for hours later. I'm a diabetic. FML
goldendarkness
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to stop by a drive-thru on the way to his place. I asked him to order a Coke for me, at which point he asked if I wanted to make it a Diet Coke. FML
Clairebear
United States
Maturity level
Today, I went on a date with someone I'd met online. Everything was going surprisingly well, until I knocked over my drink, spilling it all over my date's lap. In a panic, I blurted out, "Dude, did you piss yourself?" Needless to say, there will be no second date. FML
Kristie
Australia
NEXT!
Today, I went on a blind date. Everything was going great until I laughed so hard at one of his jokes that I snorted, choked on my drink, and accidentally slapped his face while trying to cover my mouth. We didn't order dessert. FML
Anonymous
Findlay, United States
Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a Diet Coke?" FML
pissypants
Maybe he's into that...
Today, at the movies on a date, I drank all my soda and waited too long. I couldn't take it anymore and quickly got up, knocking my date's popcorn on the floor, and ran to the bathroom. I didn’t make it and went home in shame. It’s better he thinks I stood him up. FML
Sara
Blackpool, United Kingdom
Klutz
Today, I went on a date with someone I really like. Midway through dinner, I felt something stuck in my teeth and, trying to be discreet, attempted to remove it. In the process, I flicked a piece of food across the table and it landed in his drink. He looked at it, then at me, then sighed. FML
Freddie
Chattanooga, United States
Cursed
Today, I went on my first date in months. It was going well until the waiter brought our drinks. I went to take a sip of my cocktail, but I misjudged the size of the glass and the stupid paper straw, and spilled it all over myself. The waiter said, “Well, at least it’s not a first date curse,” and I replied, “Oh, it definitely is.” It was, because I doubt I'll be seeing her again. FML
Anonymous
He's a keeper
Today, I went on a first date. He got so drunk he forgot what he ordered to eat ten minutes after ordering. He also had to text me later to ask if we kissed, because he couldn’t remember. FML
Top comments
Brightside86 31
Diet water sounds like an excellent business opportunity to me.
Sweetie 5
LOL I actually had a friend do this in a chinese restaurant. Poor little waitress was so confused.
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Comments (4)
RichardPencil 32
"Hello, my name is eating disorder."
Brightside86 31
Diet water sounds like an excellent business opportunity to me.
Sweetie 5
LOL I actually had a friend do this in a chinese restaurant. Poor little waitress was so confused.
Paul Storstein Anderson 5
I actually do make this order as a purposeful joke.