Today, my previously blond boyfriend dyed his hair dark brown and shaved his beard. When he got home, I thought he was an intruder and screamed. Now he thinks I don't love him because I didn't recognize him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home early to surprise my boyfriend. I walked into our bedroom to find him in dressed completely in my clothes, and in makeup. It took me a moment to realize it was him and not a female intruder. FML
Today, my girlfriend dyed her hair from blonde to brunette. An hour later, she found one of her blonde hairs on my pillow, and accused me of cheating. FML
Today, my husband won't shave his beard, despite the fact it grows in wiry and looks like pubic hair. He is now accusing me of "not loving him for who he is." FML
Today, my boyfriend of 6 months started a bitter fight with me. The cause was me repeatedly refusing to dye my hair the way his beloved ex did. FML
Today, I had my hair done for the first time in 3 years. I loved it. My boyfriend told me I look like his ex. FML
Today, after months of my (now ex) boyfriend telling me he wished I was blonde with big boobs, I finally retaliated with "I wish you were a redhead with a big dick, but you don't see me complaining." He cried and said I should love him for who he is. FML
Today, I saw my boyfriend coming up the walkway to our home. When I opened the door to greet him with a huge smile on my face, he scowled at me and angrily said, "I don't know why you have to do that!" Smile gone. FML
Today, my boyfriend freaked out at me because he found a couple of orange hairs in my bed and he knows my ex is a redhead. He also knows I have two orange cats. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me over for dinner. When I walked in the door, he asked why I was here; apparently he dialed the wrong girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me. Apparently, my nose hair scares him. FML
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Top comments
Angel Meadows 8
That's a huge change, what in the world did he expect?!
Charlie Given 28
Wow I'd be wondering why such a big change.🤔
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Comments (13)
Angel Meadows 8
That's a huge change, what in the world did he expect?!
Angel Meadows 8
I mean, have you ever actually seen him without a beard before? If you haven't that alone is enough of a change to prompt a double take but with dyed hair at first glance of course you wouldn't think it was actually him.
Charlie Given 28
Wow I'd be wondering why such a big change.🤔
real life problems 26
Tell him to find his balls, probably in your purse, and man the **** up.
Glowworm56 27
Trust me, I'm terrible at recognizing people when they dye their hair--it's completely understandable that you freaked out.
chosha_fml 27
Yeah, tell your nitwit boyfriend that CIA-level facial recognition skills are not a prerequisite for loving someone.
boopingsnoot 25
If he dyed his hair, then he wouldn’t even SMELL the same! I had enough trouble recognizing my mom when she first started wearing glasses!
ohsnapword 21
If you think this is a big change, wait until he completes his transition.
PsychoBillyGoat 23
You could have shortened this FML by simply saying today my boyfriend became my girlfriend
Cali 57
Because he shaved his face? Because he has emotions? Not sure what you're getting at here...
FishyFishy 12
Well, I guess you can claim he is still an intruder and throw him out.
Jose Luis Zaragoza 4
How you not recognize him lol