Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I started my job as a high school janitor. A student decided to welcome me by taking a dump in the urinal. FML
Today, I saw some pretty heinous graffiti on the urinal stall at school, so I opted to scribble it out. A supervisor came in the second the pen touched the stall. Now I have detention and have to scrub the entire stall clean as a "lesson". FML
Today, while at work, I saw a kid empty his bladder all over the floor. His mother walked over, looked at me, said, "Yep… that just happened," and dragged him away. I'm a 30-year-old man, four credits shy of a Master's, stuck cleaning up piss at a dead-end job. FML
Today, I'm a janitor at a middle school. Someone took a poo and placed it on the sink. FML
Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML
Today, someone (we don't know who) put a very massive and noticeable graffiti "mural" in the bathroom at my workplace. Guess who's job it was to clean it? If you said me, you'd be wrong. However, the guy whose job it was got distracted and didn't do it, so it became my job after all. FML
Today, I came back from school camp and really had to go to the toilet. I ran to the nearest one, which was by the principal's office. After I finished, I tried to flush the button. Turns out the water was turned off so it wouldn't flush. I bolted. The principal is now stuck with my unwanted present. FML
Today, my friend made the effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML
Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML
Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML
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Top comments
dianeface 0
Trust me, the high school kids will think its hilarious.
This_Guy 0
Just tell them that you actually did your job, but some kids drew that when you left.
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Comments (261)
Ihatecupcakes17 0
This is fake. Seen one just like it with a lawn most. Why the **** am I wasting my time here?
life_sucks_screw 0
thats awesome
jademariie 0
hahahaha omg.
nightheat 5
LIER!!!!! you stole this off the radio I heard the same thing you **** JK but still u stole this. :'(
MothsWings 4
That was silly of you! Just call it Senior prank.
Littlebrraatt 14
For everyone calling OP a guy... SHE is a girl.
gccobra 0
Holy crap rthe samething happened to me OP i drew a penis with bronzer on a basketball court and it wouldnt come off!!!!!!
Dflips 0
I agree that it sucks cuz I woulda done the same
msbrendabella 10
I don't know wuts funnier: ur fml or the fact that u r a janitor and u have an fml account haha XD
msbrendabella 10
Haha ok smart ass. When you think of a janitor what do you see? Most likely you will think of an older gentleman, right? I never said there was anything wrong with being a janitor, I was simply pointing out that it's unusual. Go troll somebody else! Your are seriously pathetic if you are trying to insult my spelling. It's not like this is some important online debate, it's a website where people submit stories of misfortune for ****'s sake! Get a life!
msbrendabella 10
And seriously your trolling a 17 year old? Your 39! Don't you have kids to take care of or a real job you should be doing!?
Trilogy 1
Lollol good one