Today, my husband and I hosted Easter dinner. Since I was in my own home, I breastfed without a cover. My sister-in-law stormed out in a rage, screaming that I was being obscene, and equated it to shooting heroin in front of her kids. Happy Easter indeed. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my mom visited, and I left her for a few minutes while I used the bathroom. While I was stuck taking a crap, she went on one of her religious rants, telling my children that Easter was off this year because their precious "pagan" Easter Bunny had been murdered. FML
Today, what started as a fun family Easter egg hunt turned within minutes into my mother-in-law's big chance to be a dramatic cow by screaming at my 5 and 7-year-old daughters for participating in a "vile pagan ritual" and saying that we're all going to hell. They're still bawling. FML
Today, a woman started breastfeeding her infant in a restaurant. Disgusted, I told her to take it to the bathroom, as I was eating. In response, she squirted me with milk then went back to ignoring me. FML
Today, my in-laws invited us over to dinner. I decided to help out in the kitchen and watched in horror as my mother-in-law licked every utensil, sucked her fingers while making the plates and slurped wine straight from the bottle. My husband said I was rude for refusing to eat. FML
Today, my sister in law threatened to call CPS on me because I “starved” her children when they spent the night. I didn’t starve them. I made an actual home cooked meal instead of the microwaveable or fast food crap she constantly feeds them. They chose not to eat and threw tantrums instead. FML
Today, at work, I was taking a woman's measurements while she held her screaming baby. To silence the infant, she whipped out her breast right there and started feeding him. Moments later, he puked breast milk all over my desk. FML
Today, it was my brother's wedding so my mother-in-law was taking care of my 8-month-old son. When I came back to our room to check how things were going, I saw her "breastfeeding" my child. She said it was the only way to calm him down because he didn't have a pacifier. FML
Today, my wife opted for a home birth with a nurse and her mother. Her mother is such a baby-feral, men-are-bastards, hippie feminist dragon that not only did she yell at me when I tried to be in the room, she has now pushed me out of the house. I ended up sat in my car with only one shoe and no phone. FML
Today, my husband once again thought it would be funny to rage-bait our child during dinner. There was screaming, food being thrown around, and a whole lot of running around instead of eating. I already had a headache and was already overstimulated, so I had to fend off a meltdown. All this over chicken burgers. FML
Today, I was nursing my baby in the park while my older kids played. A man stormed over and started screaming how vulgar and disgusting I was being, and how he didn’t want his kids exposed to “all that”. He and his buddies were all shirtless and playing vulgar music loudly through a speaker. FML
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Top comments
09051308288 17
There is nothing wrong with feeding your own child. She should have known better than to do it because she is also a mother just like you.
RichardPencil 32
Is she the chairman of the Itty Bitty Titty Committy*? *Yeah, I know it’s really “committee.”
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Comments (23)
azouwa 26
I've noticed its only women who seem to have a problem with breast feeding. I've never met or heard of a male who has issues with it. A woman once gave me that look as I breast fed my baby in the back seat of a car, with a cover, in a parking lot. Sorry OP. FYL. :-(
Zekfen 17
I’ve read/heard stories where it is men harassing women for doing so. Down here in the Bible Belt it happens a lot, old, young, male, female. You’d think religious people would be all for it, that is how Jesus was raised after all!
WhatHappenedToIt 22
seriously? you've never heard of a women being told shes a ***** or a pervert for BF? trying googling it. one woman was verbally assaulted by a guy in a bookstore I think it was for bf her babe.
corky1992 33
It does happen. I saw a video a year or two ago that went viral about a man being nasty to a woman for breastfeeding in Target. He was escorted out by employees.
withered 30
Agreed. For some weird reason people get offended that something they ********** to is used for it's actual purpose. Yet having giant cleavage doesn't bother them at all. "How dare you attach a child to your breast in public!? I can't wank to that! Just show off your breasts without a child and let the child scream and be hungry!". I guess they have some ****** up view about human bodies.
RichardPencil 32
Is she the chairman of the Itty Bitty Titty Committy*? *Yeah, I know it’s really “committee.”
_ali__cat_ 14
as the president of the itty bitty titty commitee, I would be perfectly fine with a woman of any size feeding her baby
09051308288 17
There is nothing wrong with feeding your own child. She should have known better than to do it because she is also a mother just like you.
sumocj 14
Remember, don’t share nipples. I mean needles
bigdaddyeric 37
I genuinely LOL’d on your comment!
LAUGHINGKOMODO 25
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Did you at least offer her some? I can see why she would be mad of you don't share the tiddy.
RichardPencil 32
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You probably should have not done that on Easter. She was angry because your display made her husband “rise from the dead,” if you know what I mean ;)
A Frenchy in Eire 31
What type of man gets aroused by a baby getting their milk?
MaxLegroom 3
Oh, have you no idea of the absolute lack of a bottom to what human beings get off on?
RichardPencil 32
Boob guys. We like looking at boobs and don’t care about the context of how we see them.
mssileas 25
...and that is OP's problem how? Dude if your husband can't keep it in his pants because some woman is feeding her baby, sort his ass out. Also, if her SISTER-IN-LAW was upset, you think her own brother would have gotten a stiffy from watching his sister breatfeed his niece/nephew....??? But good job on just putting the blame on the woman in this story, you are the pinnacle of human development.
Cali 57
Good job identifying sarcasm!
sbhular 7
So, I’ve noticed that women who didn’t breast feed sometimes have an irrational anger or annoyance at breastfeeding because society makes them feel guilty. Although we all know fed is best!
Rabite 28
How do you know that she didn't brestfeed herself and cared a lot about covering up while doing so?
PenguinPal3017 19
She probably didn't breastfeed herself because her nipples can't reach her mouth.
Dark♡Twisty 8
Screw her!!! Feed the boobies!!! I breastfeed everywhere without a cover and could care less what people thought. It’s good for young kids to learn! FYL OP
Dark♡Twisty 8
*free not feed sigh.
Dave_Davington 35
*couldn't not could. Another sigh.
ohsnapword 21
How dare you allow your child to eat in the presence of others. Don't you know that children are supposed to eat in the bathroom? It's only civilized to feed your child while sitting on the toilet.
Dave_Davington 35
Honestly, people who get offended with breastfeeding need to shut the **** up. What I'm doing is completely natural and strengthens the bond between me and my dog.
sarkycow 25
This made me laugh out loud! thanks :-D