Today, my girlfriend confronted me for forgetting to take the trash out. At some point during the argument, I tried to calm her down, and the words "I should of" escaped my lips. She spent the next ten minutes calling me stupid and laughing at how my grammar goes to hell when I'm distressed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my caring way too much about proper grammar got out of hand when I corrected my girlfriend during a talk about her dying grandmother. FML
Today, I yelled at my girlfriend because I thought she'd thrown away an important form I needed to fill out. I found it a few minutes later, just stuck to the back of another piece of paper. After apologizing for getting mad, all she said was, "I'm used to it." FML
Today, my wife yelled at me for being a bastard and not caring about her needs. I felt like an asshole and apologized for everything. It took me a few hours to realize I'd basically just apologized for unknowingly hanging the toilet paper the "wrong way" for her OCD. FML
Today, I found out my girlfriend starts fights with me over text because apparently, when I'm arguing with someone, I stop speaking in "annoying shorthand" and am grammatically correct. FML
Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML
Today, my wife and I got into an argument. She ran out, yelling. Later, at work, I felt guilty, so I picked up some flowers and a card. When I presented them to her, she looked puzzled. I made the mistake of reminding her about our argument. She is now mad at me, again. FML
Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML
Today, I had a massive argument with my boyfriend, in which he called me stupid repeatedly. I stomped out of his house and sent a very angry text to my best friend about him. She didn't text back. Then my boyfriend texted, "My girlfriend is so stupid, she can't even text the right number." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I had an argument. She admitted she didn't know why she was pissed at me, but still is, and now she won't talk to me. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
I have a feeling this will be one of the most grammatically-corrected threads in the history of FML. That should serve as fair warning to all the "ur" idiots out there.
happle 21
I think saying it is fine since it sounds like "should've." Your girlfriend sounds like a bitch, OP.
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Comments (161)
lmbachman 23
What a bitch.
om102907 4
I am a mental health professional and I am gonna say that if she is picking apart your statements and using them as a way to belittle you, she is an abuser and you need to get away from her.
Ppcorn100 7
I read this yesterday, not understanding it, and only realized today it should be "I should have..." Im becoming one of them
heyhooker 11
Your girlfriend is a bitch
BananerzFresh 12
I am sure she has her moments. If you ever catch one just say "and you call me stupid." Then walk away.
doglover100 29
They do sound alike.
dmac843 2
Dump her NOW. It's only going to get worse.
FizzyApple 3
I accidentally read this whole thing as "grandma" instead of girlfriend. It still works.
AtomicRebirth 11
But, in speech, "should of" would just end up being "should've" which is perfectly grammatically acceptable. Your girlfriend sucks, dude.
djjjsnsn 1
lololll